Ya-dizzle! (My odd way of saying Hello)

Anyways, this is the next chapter of my story, which I was meaning to update sooner but... I was lazy and randomly got into watching Desperate Housewives. Don't ask, just don't ask...


"Sparrow? Can I ask you a question?"

"Yup"

"Why is there a woman with us. More importantly, why is there a woman with us who actually smells like she's had a bath?"

"Good question Gibbs... Good question..."

I rolled my eyes (impolite, I know. But this is neither the time nor place)

"Nearly there my darling" The main pirate said, directing the statement to me.

This did not reassure me.

We turned the corner,the main pirate stopped and smiled proudly "TA-DAAAAAA!"

It's a dingy.

It's a flooded dingy.

It's a flooded dingy stuffed to the brim with rum.

"Is this used as some sort of device in order to get us to the ship?" I asked. Both pirates shook their heads.

"Well, actually... We had...Difficulties with the last ship..." The main pirate looked as if he was about to cry.

"What? Was it a bad ship?"

"NO!" He screamed "It got... Got..." He burst into tears.

"Jack doesn't like to talk about it" The shorter, fatter pirate said, patting him on the back.

"SHE WAS SO BEAUTIFUL!" Jack sobbed. The other pirate started to cradle him.

"Oh..." I nodded.

This is my chance.

"ESCAAAAAAAPE!" I screamed, making some sort of warped attempt to run away.

"NOOOOO!" Jack yelled "WE NEED TO USE HER FOR BLACKMAIL!"

"AFTER THE POSH LADY WHO CAN'T RUN PROPERLY!" The other pirate yelled.

I could hear them both running after me.

DAMN! (First ever time I've used that word) Why did I decide to wear the most uncomfortable shoes of all time on this ONE day?!

I turned the corner, where a drunk vagrant was being sick onto the pavement, I screamed and turned around.

"GOTCHA!" Jack screamed, grabbing onto me "THANK GOD FOR WOMEN'S HEELS!"

"NOOOO!" I yelled, "I CAN'T GET ONTO... ONTO... THAT HELLISH PLANK OF WOOD THAT YOU PEOPLE HAVE DECIDED TO CALL A BOAT!"

"DO NOT INSULT THE MINI PEARL!" Jack snapped, dragging me back to the dingy.

"Stop struggling!" The fatter pirate said, trying to grab onto my kicking legs "We'll put down some paper or something, okay?!"


If there is such a thing as hell. This is it.

The "boat" is disgusting, and the two pirates are now drunk, and attempting- and failing, to row it.

"Does anybody actually know where we are planning to go?" I said, holding a hankie to my nose (They smelled)

"If we knew that, my darling..." Jack said, leaning towards me "We would be even drunker by now" He flopped forwards.

He flopped forwards, and fell asleep onto my lap.

"Momma" He mumbled, sucking his thumb, "Momma"


La TA DAAAAAAA...

That's the next chapter.

I noticed how in several stories, Jack had the Pearl back, and it could at least do with some explaining as to how he got it back, even if it was just a sentence or two. But in this one he doesn't have it back yet. (and he's named the dingy the Mini pearl)

Please R&R