11Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter!
Author's note: When I listened to 'When you look me in the eyes' by the Jonas Brothers, I just had to write a Draco/Harry story. I've been listening to this song the entire time while writing this story. The beginning is a little sad but there's cute stuff too! I hope you'll enjoy it! The song did make me feel all mushy, haha. I entire blame this song for everything written below this, hahah.
Dedicated to: Jonni (.BloodyMarry.) because she is the sister that I never had, because she makes me laugh, because we have so much in common that it's scary, because she makes me a better writer, because she is the best friend anyone can ask for, because she is who she is! I love this girl!
When you look me in the eyes
Harry ran a hand through his messy black hair, barely aware he was doing it which was a clear sign he was in deep thought. He was sitting on the window sill of his dorm. The other boys were all asleep, their soft and not so soft snores filled the room. He was staring outside, watching the rain poor down heavily. There was a troubled expression in his eyes, there often was an expression like that in his eyes when he was thinking about the person he hated and yet loved more than anything. Not a day went by without him wondering why he had crossed that thin line between love and hate?
He was no closer to figuring it out now than he was five months ago when they had shared their first kiss. They'd been fighting, like usual but without an audience this time. Harry had been walking back to his common room and had happened to run into the Slytherin git he had hated from day one. They'd been shouting insults at each other within seconds. The hate in Draco's eyes had mirrored the one in his but at the same time, there had been a passion in the Slytherin's eyes and Harry had found himself unwillingly responding to the intense gaze. The next thing he knew was being shoved up against the wall with Draco's lips firmly locked on his and his hands sliding in Draco's silky soft hair without even being aware of doing it.
It had been the most intense kiss Harry had ever had. They'd been pretty much devouring each other's mouths, even trying to gain the upper hand in the kiss. Draco had pulled away first and he could still remember the sound of their harsh breathing and the look of pure lust in Draco's eyes that had made Harry swallow. He remembered Draco's kiss swollen lips and his messed up hair. He remembered Draco's firm grip on his hips. It was in that moment that he had fallen completely and utterly in love with the Slytherin. Instead of walking away like he should have, he had kissed him again, much softer and Draco had responded with equal gentleness.
The conversation after that kiss had been awkward and unpleasant but they had agreed they owed it to themselves to try and figure out if whatever they had going could turn into something. They kept up the façade of hating each other which Harry had found out to be very easy since his hate had in no way gone away completely. Sometimes he felt like he was stuck on that line between love and hate and that he just couldn't cross over to one side or the other. Unlike before, Draco could really hurt him by saying something mean. He hated that Draco had that kind of power over him and hated it even more that after all those years, Draco knew exactly what to say to hurt him. Their fights recently had become more intense, just because of that. If Draco really hurt him, he hurt the other boy right back and vice versa.
Ron and Hermione weren't blind, they had noticed their fights upset him more than they used to but Harry had just said that after all those years, it was getting harder. They had believed it but had been keeping a closer eye on him and had been trying to keep him away from Draco outside of classes. They were fairly successful. They would probably kill him if they knew he actually went to the other boy behind their backs. Sometimes when the two of them met up in private, they would continue their fights, leaving them so emotionally drained that they had to ignore each other for days.
If Harry was sure of one thing, then it was that their relationship, if it could be called that, was anything but healthy. They were destroying each other and themselves by putting each other through their whole love/hate relationship and yet they couldn't end it because for every bad moment, there was a good moment to balance it out. And every good moment made Harry realize how much he needed Draco and what they had. Sometimes they just talked for hours after everything and nothing. Their conversations were silly as often as they were serious. Draco made him laugh, was there for him.
He shook his head and returned to bed. He was losing sleep over this and his mood swings were becoming as bad as a girl on her period.
The next morning didn't start out very well. He managed to run into Malfoy and his gang of Slytherins even before breakfast.
"Potter," Draco said with that smirk that made Harry want to either punch him or kiss him. He still wasn't sure which was the better option.
"Can we do this after breakfast?" Harry spoke wearily. Of course Harry knew Draco wouldn't exactly say 'yes', especially not with his friends standing by and expecting an argument.
Draco opened his mouth to say something but Ron stepped in, glaring daggers at Draco and the Slytherins.
"Leave him alone, Malfoy. For like forever." Ron spat.
"Now now, Weasley, don't get your knickers in a twist this early in the morning." Draco said with an amused expression on his face.
Hermione ended what would have become an argument by just pulling Harry away and he was glad she did because he didn't feel up like arguing just yet. They joined Ginny and her friends.
"I'm so glad it's Saturday," Ron said with a happy sigh.
Harry managed to send a grin his friend's way. "Me too. I have so much homework to catch up on."
Ron threw him a look of total disbelief. "When did you start sounding like Hermione?"
Hermione gave him a kick under the table.
"Ow!" Ron muttered, glaring at his friend. Hermione threw him an overly sweet smile that made Ginny laugh.
"Sorry," Harry said, smiling, "But I do have a lot to catch up on." He took another slice of toast and ate it dry. He liked it that way.
Ron sighed defeated, "Yeah, me too. But that will not stop me from enjoying this Saturday!" he exclaimed in an overly dramatic kind of voice that had people at the Ravenclaw table give him funny looks.
Harry patted Ron's arm. "Good for you."
Harry's attention was drawn to the Slytherin table and he was only half listening to a discussion going on between Hermione, Ron and Ginny about whether it was a good idea or not to 'accidentally' make a potion explode all over Snape. Draco's eyes met his and he gave him a barely visible smile before looking away. Harry saw him say something to his friends before getting up and heading to the entrance of the Great Hall. Their eyes met again and the slight jerk of Draco's head told him to follow.
"I got to go," he said quickly to his friends and tried to walk slowly out of the Great Hall but his feet had other plans. He was just in time to see Draco round a corner and he followed, greeting Seamus as he passed him. He didn't have to follow Draco to know where he was headed to. The Room of Requirement had become their favourite go-to spot. He found Draco waiting for him outside the room.
"Good thing Granger pulled you away." Draco said as he approached with a little smile that looked sad. The same sadness was reflected in his grey eyes.
"Yeah, I didn't really feel up like another fight." Harry agreed while they entered the Room. It always looked pretty much the same. There was an oversized bed and a way too comfortable couch that Harry wished was in the common room. The room was decorated in both red and gold and green and silver.
Draco sat down on the couch and pulled down the shorter boy next to him. Harry rested his head against Draco's chest and toed of his shoes before resting his legs on the couch as well.
"My father sent another letter this morning, telling me how proud he is of me for doing so good."
"Well, that's good," Harry said with a smile as he looked up at Draco. He knew how much his family meant to Draco and while Harry didn't agree with their choice of career, he could only respect them for being there for Draco when he needed them. They definitely weren't the world's worst parents.
"Yeah," Draco said with a smile, "Doesn't happen often that he actually says he's proud. Usually he's just pointing out what I'm doing wrong."
"You know it is because he cares, he just doesn't want you to make the same mistakes or whatever."
"I know. I just wish he wouldn't be involved with the Death Eaters. I'm dreading the start of the war."
"Let's not worry about that yet," Harry said firmly.
"Yeah, you're right. Thinking about the war is just depressing."
"Tell me about it," Harry muttered. He shook his head. "Anyway, we're playing against Ravenclaw next weekend."
"I know," Draco said with a smile, "And I know who's going to win too. The Ravenclaw team is worth crap against the Gryffindor team. As much as it kills me to say it, you guys are good."
Harry had to laugh at the expression of disgust that crossed Draco's features upon saying this seemingly horrible thing. Well, he could believe it was for Draco, admitting that the Gryffindor team was actually good.
"Good? We're great! We even kick your butts!" Harry said jokingly.
"I'll let you in on a little secret, I let you win."
Harry playfully punched Draco's chest. "Yeah, in your dreams! Admit it, I'm just a better!"
"In your dreams. I could take you anytime."
"Oh, that I've noticed," Harry spoke with a wicked gleam in his eyes.
"You have a dirty mind, Potter, you know that?" Draco said, fighting the smile that was threatening to break out.
"You've told me once or twice." Harry said with a Draco worthy smirk. He'd learned from the master himself.
"You have a bad influence on me, really."
"Hah! Says mister cunning and sly. If someone is having a bad influence on the other, it's you that's having a bad influence on me!"
"Oh really?" Draco said, raising his eyebrow, "When's the last time I turned what you said into something dirty?"
"You do realize that's not helping your point, right? I mean, if I was rubbing off on you, you would be turning things I said into dirty things."
"You should rub off on me some more." Draco said in a low voice that sent shivers up Harry's spine.
"Man, I really am a bad influence."
"Told you so," Draco said, sticking out his tongue.
"Oh, very mature, Malfoy!"
"I know, isn't it just wonderful?" Draco said with a wide grin. Harry made a face but then couldn't help but burst out in laughter at how their conversation had turned out. It was moments like these that made him remember why they were actually good together. It was moments like these that made his heart swell with what could only be described as love. It was that simple. It was love.
He stopped laughing, noticing that the grin was still firmly plastered on Draco's face. He would have to do something about that. He leaned up and pressed his lips to Draco's. He shifted his position so that he was sitting on his knees next to Draco which made it easer to kiss him. Draco's hand was running slowly up and down his back. That and the kiss made Harry relax, all the stress of school and their fights falling away from him in that perfect moment.
"You know what you need?" Draco asked after pulling away.
"Another kiss?"
"No, well yes. But no, a massage!"
"That's the best idea I've heard all week." Harry said with a happy grin. "Bed?" Upon Draco's nod, he got up and went to lie on the bed after pulling off his shirt.
A bowl of massaging oil appeared on the bed for Draco to use. Harry closed his eyes and waited for Draco to start. Soon enough Draco's hands settled on his shoulders, working on the tight knots that Harry had no idea where even there. After a couple of minutes, Draco's hands moved lower, working on his upper back. Harry sighed happily. Draco was really good at this. He could feel himself relax completely in the mattress and he started to doze off slightly.
"Hey, no falling asleep," came Draco's voice. It sounded far away.
"'m not sleeping," Harry mumbled, voice sounding more asleep than awake.
Draco chuckled and his hands moved lower again. Harry was in that blissful state between dreaming and being awake where he was still aware of what was happening but was starting to dream as well. Reality and dreams merged together.
When Draco stopped Merlin knows how much later, he woke up again at once.
"Aw, it's over already?"
"I just spent half an hour working on your back."
Harry rolled over on his back which appeared to be quite a challenge with Draco's straddling him but he managed. "Half an hour? It didn't seem that long."
"You were asleep." Draco pointed out with a grin.
"I was not. I just wasn't completely awake either."
"Just admit I'm good at this."
"You're the best at this!" Harry replied smiling, "Now what about that other thing I need? … Another kiss." He clarified at Draco's expression of confusion. Draco's mouth formed 'oh' but it didn't come out. His boyfriend leaned down and captured his lips in another gentle kiss. Harry wrapped his arms around Draco's neck and lazily returned the kiss. He couldn't remember the last time he had felt this good. It was thanks to Draco that he did. Draco's tongue licked at his lips and Harry opened his to let Draco's tongue play with his own.
Harry was the one breaking the kiss, gasping for breath. Draco's eyes locked with his own and Harry saw so many different emotions in his grey eyes that it took his breath away.
"I love you, Harry." Draco whispered, in a rough passion filled voice.
A smile immediately appeared on Harry's face and he rested a hand against Draco's cheek, stroking the flesh tenderly.
"I love you too," he whispered. And it really was as simple as that. Moments like these made the fights seem almost worth it. As long as they had their love, they had the chance of surviving as a couple.
When you look me in the eyes,
And tell me that you love me.
Everything's alright,
When you're right here by my side.
When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.
I find my paradise,
When you look me in the eyes.
Well, this story pretty much wrote itself! I hope you liked it! Drop me a review and let me know!
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