Chapter 4

Time for another prank idea.

Disclaimer: The Marauders and all other characters came from the awesome mind of J.K. Rowling. And sadly, none of us are her.

S: I can't believe we got detention.

J: I know. Even after we told her it was Moony.

S: McGonagall's prejudice really isn't fair.

J: She can't hold the past against us.

S: She needs to move on. Forgive and forget.

J: I wouldn't be so offended if she had punished him at all.

S: She didn't even yell at him. Let alone give him detention.

J: No detention for precious prefect Moony.

S: That would look awful after she selected him for the job.

J: Actually Dumbledore did that.

S: That is beside the point Prongs.

J: Sorry.

S: Someone needs to teach those prefects a lesson.

J: They think they know everyth… Wait! That's a brilliant idea.

S: What is?

J: About teaching the prefects a lesson.

S: But they know everything. How are we supposed to teach them anything?

J: You know that's just a figure of speech right.

S: Oh… I mean, yeah of course I knew that. So how are we teaching them this lesson?

J: How do we teach anyone a lesson?

S: Are you suggesting a prank my dear friend?

J: Of course.

S: Brilliant. But how do we target only the prefects? We'd hate to have innocent bystanders get hurt.

J: That is not the Marauder way. Remember?

S: Oh yeah. The more people…

J: The better. But I think our targets should only be the prefects.

S: Anyone else who gets involved is just a bonus.

J: Agreed.

S: But how do we do it?

J: Prefects bathroom.

S: Perfect. We could summon the giant squid from the lake and put it in the bathtub. Or we could put stink pellets in all of their robes. Or we could…

J: Those are so typical of us Sirius. Besides we already did the giant squid thing.

S: Oh yeah. That was definitely the highlight of first year.

J: Good times. Good times. But that's enough reminiscing.

S: If you don't like any of those ideas, then what's the plan?

J: I think we should use the Muggle way.

S: Of course. But which prank should we use?

J: Shall we consult the book?

S: We shall my partner in crime.

J: Keep an eye on McGonagall.

S: Why?

J: To make sure we don't get caught dumb ass.

S: I was lookout last time. Let me see the book.

J: No. You don't even know what to look for.

S: Neither do you. Give me the book.

J: No.

S: Yes.

J: No.

S: Yes.

J: Let go Padfoot.

S: Why are we writing this all down?

J: Doesn't matter. Just give me the book.

McGonagall: (speaking) What is going on over here?

S: James won't let me read the book.

J: That's because I'm looking at it.

McGonagall: You two are fighting over… a book?

S: What happened to her?

J: I think she fainted.

S: I think we took her by surprise.

J: Yeah. Can you believe we were fighting over a book?

S: We've been spending too much time with Moony.

J: So what's the detention rule on if your teacher passes out?

S: Don't know. It's the first time it's happened to us.

J: No. It's the first time that we didn't use magic to make them pass out.

S: True. Well I think its wait 5 minutes and if they don't revive, then we ditch.

J: Has it been 5 minutes yet?

S: Probably about 2.

J: Close enough. Let's go.

A few minutes later.

J: Alright so the book has a couple bathroom prank ideas. There's blocking all the toilets, taking melted chocolate and spreading it all over the walls to make it look someone crapped all over, or covering all the toilets with saran wrap.

S: What's saran wrap?

J: Some sort of Muggle contraption.

S: That does what?

J: Well judging from the well drawn picture at the bottom of the page…

S: That is a very good picture. Who's the illustrator of this book?

J: Well it looks like it's… wait it second… it doesn't matter.

S: OW! Why did you hit me?

J: 'Cause you're not focusing on the task at hand.

S: So you hit me? That hurts my feelings. *sulks*

J: Focus!

S: Fine!

J: Saran Wrap is this clear plastic stuff.

S: What the heck could Muggles use that for?

J: For covering toilet seats apparently.

S: I'll never understand Muggles. Why would anyone want to cover a toilet seat with plastic stuff?

J: Because when someone tries to use the toilet, it wouldn't go in. It would just go everywhere.

S: That's disgusting. So when do we attack?

J: Well the prefects normally hang out in the bathroom until midnight on a Friday night.

S: Just to show that they can stay out later than us normal people and not get into trouble.

J: Gits. Besides who hangs out in a bathroom?

S: Gits. So we should do it after they've gone to bed.

J: Do you know how late that would be? I've got Quidditch practice in the morning.

S: Prongs what is more important, your reputation as a great Quidditch player or giving the prefects what they deserve?

J: I'm gonna have to have to say Quidditch. Being a great Quidditch player is part of my plan to impress Evans.

S: It's never going to work.

J: You wait. I'll win her over yet.

S: So are you helping me or not?

J: Not. You can cover this one on your own.

S: Can you at least get me the Saran Wrap?

J: Oh yeah. I'll just go into my trunk and pull out my supply of Saran Wrap.

S: Why do you have… wait are you being sarcastic? OW!

J: Moron. Just transfigure something into Saran Wrap.

S: Stop hitting me!

J: No.

S: OW! You'll pay for that.

J: OW! You can't hit me.

S: Watch me.

J: OW! Knock it off.

S: OW!

J: OW! Oh crap. Lily saw that.

Lily: What are you two doing?

J: Nothing Evans. So what are you doing out so late?

Lily: I am a prefect Potter. I'm going to hang out with the other prefects in our bathroom. And what are you doing out so late? I should give you detention.

J: Sorry Evans. Sirius and I are actually on our way back from detention.

S: There's nothing you can do to us now. So ha ha.

J: Shut up Sirius! So what are you doing tomorrow Evans? Want to come watch me at Quidditch practice?

Lily: I'd rather go swimming with the giant squid.

S: What is it with you in the giant squid?

Lily: Shut up Sirius!

S: You guys are both so mean to me. I'm going to bed.

J: Good. So Evans…

Lily: Good bye Potter.

S: That totally failed dude.

J: I thought you were going to bed.

S: Yeah. But it's more fun to watch Evans turn you down. Besides I'm pranking the prefect's bathroom in a few hours. I can't go to bed now.

J: Right. Well have fun pranking the… Shit! Lily is a prefect.

S: So you want in?

J: No. You can't prank the prefect's bathroom. She could involved in it.

S: Yeah I know mate. But the prefect's need to be taught a lesson.

J: So you're going to do it. No matter what I say.

S: Right now you're not saying anything. You're writing it.

J: Shut up! Are you going to do the prank?

S: Of course I am. It's bloody brilliant.

J: It is isn't it. I mean for a Muggle idea… no. You can't do this. She'll know that I'm behind it and she'll never fall in love with me.

S: She'll never fall in love with you anyways.

J: Shut up! She will. Eventually.

S: Well I'm doing the prank. Just keep her out of the bathroom if it's so important to you.

J: How?

S: Figure it out.