A/N: A girl at school gave me this idea. Thanks for it – Don't think you realised you gave me the idea! It will be a letter per event, but I will be slow to update as I have to watch the series again to remember certain parts of an episode/event. Any ideas are welcome. This is the prologue, tell me what you think and if I should continue! Please!
It is different to my normal writing style – so points, hints or constructive criticism is expected!
Warnings: Various spoilers throughout for episodes of Higher Ground. Possibly Criminal Minds. This chapter contains spoilers for 1x07 episode of Higher Ground.
Wow, it's been so long since I last wrote to you. I'm sorry. Been caught up in work and been extremely busy, unable to find the time to write. Not surprising with my work schedule. I missed writing to you during that time.
The reason I'm writing… I honestly don't know. I guess I just needed to get some things of my chest, and talk to someone who could understand.
I've started thinking about my past recently. How long has it been now? Ten years? There is so much I miss, but mostly, I miss you guys. My team whom I wrote to you about recently; their great, sure, but their not you. Their not cliff-hangers. No body can be like you guys. We were inseparable, and, even though we didn't show it, the best of friends, family even, and we knew each other better then we knew ourselves.
Remember all the things we did, as a group, individually, or, you and me together. Remember what we used to get up to? Some things are crystal clear to me; stick out like a sore thumb. One memory in particular is more clear then others. I could almost swear it happened yesterday.
"But if God just wanted us to say no, then why'd he make it feel so good?" Ah, good old Auggie. Great comment, which is so true and I actually happen to agree with it. Why did he make it feel so good? (Yeah, ok. I know I'm not one to talk, I mean, look at my track record. But…) By the way, remember our acting before the comment. I couldn't keep my hormones in check, even for a class project. Sorry. Oh and, Peter just had to add another of his "learning tools" in didn't he. Making you and Auggie be gay, and trying to adopt. And then making me married to Friekin just because I laughed at you. I didn't even have enough money to flee the country.
Poor Daisy. "At least you know the joy of having kids. Try being childless!" This was what she said to me, and how did I reply? "I am!" That must have hurt her more then actually being childless. I had a chance to enjoy it but I refused just because of who my partner was.
At least now I have a chance to enjoy it for real – yes, I'm pregnant. I won't get mother of the year, but I will try my best to give my child a great childhood. Don't want him ending up like me.
Don't worry. It wasn't a one night stand like Princess. No, not at all. Poor Queenie, raising a five year old by herself. By the way, do you remember how desperate she was to find a father? The posters. She even got the year books out and searched through them. I think all she found out, was there was a fear or commitment.
I have to go now, work calls. I promise to write again to your during the week so it isn't so long between letters.
I love you always, Shelby