Harry Potter wuz getting back from da DOM and realized oh shit, Dumbledore's a lying bastard.

"Wait, I never felt that way about Dumbledore. What the hell's with the bad grammar? Are you trying to piss the reader off? And what is the DOM? I just got back from the department of mysteries… Oh I get it." Harry began talking to the author. "Is this another fanfic that points out the stupidity of other fanfic authors?"

"No shit Sherlock, now be a good emo fuck/gangsta wanabe/complete badass/anarchist and stick to the overly clichéd plot." The omnipotent author ordered.

"Hell, no. I'm not taking orders from you any more."

"Not good enough. I guess I could just kill you off and place a Garry Stu in here."

"I mean, Hell no, I'm not going to take orders from anyone. Now I'm gonna go cut my wrists and smoke some shit. Then I'm gonna go (author deletes this section in order to keep a T rating) then I'll go kill Dumblefuck, then I'll kill Ron before he finds out what I did to Ginny (segment author deleted), and then I'll kick Voldemort's ass with wandless magic."

"Not clichéd enough!"

"I'll kick Voldemort's ass with wandless magic bitch!" Harry yelled, realizing his life as the main character was at stake.

"Wait, I don't want to be the center of attention. Didn't you read the books?"

"But my version is better." The all powerful author stated. However, the New York Times has failed to recognize this brilliant literary artwork. Damned liberals.

"Wait, I thought you were supposed to be making fun of stupid authors, not be a republican." Harry said, pointing out the author's flaws.

"It's a fanfic, no one cares about continuity."

"I hope you put flamerz r prepz and will brn in hell on the story summary."

"You know, I saw someone put that on their story summary once. Or something close. I told her she needed to learn how to spell. I couldn't find one grammatically correct sentence in the first chapter, and there wasn't a single word over two letters spelt right. Now get back to being a whinny little bitch who has dark powers."

"I'm going back to mommy."

"Ha-ha, JKR killed your mommy."

"JKR is my mommy." Harry said before his brains were blasted out his skull by a sniper rifle shot a mile away.

"Hello Garry. It's nice to work with you again." The good author congratulated Garry Stu.

"Hey what can I say, I'm a job whore." Garry replied before the fic ended, thus getting the last spoken word.


Yes for those who know me, I usually poke fun of Garry Stus. Uh life's a pain in the ass right now and I don't think I'll update my other stories until January at least.

signed the good dr.