16Sirius sat in the kitchen of Grimmauld Place. He was alone and for that he was grateful. He was sick of Remus and his endless justifications for why he should sit here instead of going out, and Tonks flashing him sympathetic looks. Then there was Molly and her constant parade of food in front of him; she was convinced that the best way to lift his heart was with food. He soon found himself avoiding the kitchen when he smelled her cooking something up it there. Arthur wasn't much better. He was so jovial around this time of year, and Sirius never did understand how he could keep such a jolly demeanor. Christmas no doubt strained his vault this time of year, and Molly feverently worked on sweaters around the clock. He was slowly going mad listening to the needles she jinxed to knit be themselves in the corner.
Dumbledore was the worst. He was in a great mood all the time, but this time of year it was intensified greatly. When he arrived at Grimmauld Place, Sirius could smell the fresh cut pine trees on him, and the smell of ginger wafted off of him. It brought back memories of Christmas's in the past, ones whiled away at Hogwarts, plotting with his friends. As much as he tried to get rid of them, they were there, something would trigger his memory and it would start like an old machine, throwing him images that only served to make his heart just a little colder and harder.
Some were funny, like the time they had slipped a poinsettia potion into Peter's pumpkin juice. They were aiming to turn his skin a brilliant red, but having obtained a muggle poinsettia on accident, the prank had gone horribly wrong. But the look on Peter's face as he had to ask Madame Pomfrey for a quick and much needed Stool Stopper potion was priceless.
Others made him nostalgic; there was an image of Lilly and James's first kiss. No one else knew that he had seen it; he was on his way to the kitchens and ducked aside as he spotted them. As James pointed to the mistletoe, Sirius wanted to laugh at him so badly, but there was magic in the moment that Lily looked at James. Sirius was awestruck and revenant as he watched his best mate plant a kiss on her scarlet lips. Time stood still as James passed a hallmark in a wizard's life. Sirius never told anyone of that memory, Sirius kept it guarded as a testament to the special relationship that Lily and James shared.
Some memories confused him, he felt as though they were foreshadows of what was to come. There was the Christmas party in the Gryffindor Common Room and the marauders had exchanged their gifts to each other. Boys never knew the proper gift to give, and they were mostly gags and sweets. Peter had passed a small box to Sirius and he lad laughed when he opened it. Peter had always had a deranged sense of humor, despite the awkward façade he presented. Sirius opened the box and found a single cherry cordial chocolate finger, purchased at a joke shop. Peter had completed the gag by making one of his own fingers invisible for the night. They had all shared a hearty laugh over it, but if only they could have seen what was to come! Sirius was disgusted by it now.
Sirius paced from room to room, anger over the holiday brewing in him. It just wasn't fair. He desperately wanted for this to be a happy time again, but so much weighed on his mind that he simply couldn't find it in himself to join the festivities. When he did make the effort, it was strained and shallow. Harry seemed to notice his reservations and tried to goad him into happiness, but this time of the year meant nothing but despair for Sirius.
Arthur found him contemplating the tapestry and quietly approached him. Sirius was startled by his appearance and turned on his friend harshly. Arthur had looked abashed for a moment and tentatively asked him if he wanted to join them at the table for a family meal. Sirius declined, he felt his bitterness creeping up on him, but instead of the words escaping as regretful, they came out tinged with anger. Arthur silently left the room and Sirius made his way to his room. A good sleep would clear these cobwebs from his mind; he knew that that was the thing he needed. A good lie in would do him some good.
He walked into his room and shut the door. He latched it, not wanting to be disturbed for the night. As he turned and gazed at the bed he was startled to see a man seated at the end of it, boring his pale eyes into Sirius's. The man had shaggy hair and a gaunt face and was almost the image of Sirius.
"Regulus! But you're dead." Sirius was not happy to see the image of his dead brother perched on the edge of his bed. Maybe the stress of the holidays was getting to him.
"I have warnings for you, brother. Things that you need to hear. I have to teach you something." Regulus's voice was a haunted rasp of what it used to be.
"What is there that you could possible teach me? We went separate ways, brother." Sirius paused after spitting out the last word. "Please leave. I have nothing to discuss with you." Sirius pulled his robes off and changed into his nightclothes. When he turned, Regulus was at his heels, standing so close that Sirius could smell the grave dust sifting off him.
"Do not make the same mistakes that I have, brother. Do not let your bitterness dictate your actions. If you are intent upon ignoring me, if you will not hear what I have to say to you, I understand. I am damned to tell you these things, relive all of my most shameful moments for all of eternity, do not let your path meander in the wake of mine. Three will come to you this night and make you aware of the seriousness of the situation you have fallen into." With that, Regulus vanished, and nothing was in his place, save for a small trace of dirt.
Sirius shook his head. He blamed the vision on his stubborn refusal of Molly's food, his weariness and his foul mood for the last few days. Surely the visage of his brother had simply been his subconscious mind telling him to cheer up. What a dry sense of humor his mind had to send a corpse of his brother with the message. He closed his eyes and a wave of fitful sleep engulfed him.