Chapter 1 – Lying Is The Most Fun A Girl Can Have Without Taking Her Clothes Off

Is it still me that makes you sweat?
Am I who you think about in bed?
When the lights are dim and your hands are shaking as you're sliding off your dress?
Then think of what you did
And how I hope to God he was worth it.
When the lights are dim and your heart is racing as your fingers touch his skin.
I've got more wit, a better kiss, a hotter touch, a better fuck
Than any boy you'll ever meet, sweetie you had me
Girl I was it, look past the sweat, a better love deserving of
Exchanging body heat in the passenger seat?
No, no, no, you know it will always just be me
(Panic At The Disco)

Someone was banging on my front door rather incessantly actually. I groaned and rolled over brushing my long curl from my face and meeting the glaring red numbers reading 3:30. Whether it was night or day I couldn't tell you since my apartment hadn't the slightest sliver of light filtering in.

My head fell back on my pillow but the banging continued. I groaned and tossed my thin sheet off me and snatched a pair of huge pajama bottoms my boyfriend, Johnny leaves here, and slid into them. I pushed my curtains back and drew up my blinds to be met by the glaring California rays glaring in. Even blocked by the stupid cloud cover it was so freaking bright.

Okay, it's day then. Good to know.

As I sauntered through my apartment over the cool smooth hardwood floors pushing back curtains and drawing the blinds to let some light into my apartment the banging continued.

"Hold on a sec!" I yelled. "I'll be right there!"

I got to the door and flung it open. "Did you try the door turning the door knob because honey, honestly I never lock the damn thing?" I said sarcastically as Nicole flung herself into my arms. Chris was standing right behind her and grinned when he saw me.

"Just wake you up sis?" He asked cheekily.

"Yeah, my job kept me out really late. I don't really have any marked hours. But I've got this week off to spend time with you two."

"It feels like forever since I've seen you last Jessie, I missed you so much!" Nicky squealed.

"Yeah it has seemed like forever, huh? I missed you too, my darling little sister." I laughed. "C'mon, let's bring your stuff inside."

The three of us started unloading the U-haul when our lovely Aunt Jillian decided to make an appearance. I never really liked the woman; she tried to milk me for a ton of money for my place. Which is big enough for three with its three bedrooms and all, but was a total crap whole before my friend Kevin put up drywall, wood floors, fixed the plumbing, replaced the sink, ripped out the cabinets and put up glass shelves, and helped me paint the place. Basically think of anything that was in the apartment was replaced. Man I love having a carpenter as a close friend. That I slept with like twice, but we stayed cool after that.

"Jessie, I see they're moving in with you. Hello Nicole, Hello Chris." She said in her fake pleasant voice. Nicky and Chris smiled in her direction. "So with these two here, I assume your rent will have about 300 dollars extra a week, correct?" She more demanded than asked.

"Aunt Jillian, 150. We agreed on 150, I'm not charging for Chris and Nicky, to stay with me remember. They need to have time where they aren't burdened by a bill hovering over their heads. I can't afford 300 dollars more. You know that. I'm not only paying 1050 a month to rent this place that I fixed up, but I'm paying my college tuition." I rolled my eyes explaining the same thing I had when we discussed this months ago.

"Oh, right." She said disappointed I was more financially sound than she thought. "I remember now. But if there are any damages from parties or…" She began to ramble.

"Aunt Jillian, you know well that I don't have parties here." I grinned. I always had any parties not in the apartment, but the beach out back. "Plus if anything were to happen to any of the things Kevin put in for me, I could call in a favor and it would be fixed." I told her calmly and grinned insolently at her dumbfounded expression.

We carried all the boxes in and placed them in their respective rooms. Nicky and I hung out around my house and watched some celeb's life story and how totally screwed up it got after that initial taste of limelight. Chris headed out disappearing as always and leaving Nicky and me laughing throwing popcorn at each other.

Chris came in the front door and plopped down on the couch and stole the control from me. Nicky was in the shower and I was just sitting in cut off short shorts, a black bra, a sheer cream peasant top over it, and my black boots. I munched on popcorn and glanced at Chris. "How ya doing Chris?" I asked.

"Fine," he said really unconvincingly.

"Sure you are." I replied sarcastically.

"Jessie…c'mon that's not fair. You know what's been going on, I'm not in the best mood, sorry!" He said agitatedly. I leaned my head on my brother's shoulder when he finally found a channel with surfing on it. Honestly, how the hell does he find this stuff?

"You, need to get out and have some fun, Chris." I told him. "You've had the weight of the world on your shoulders for a while now since mom and dad died. I want you to take it easy and have fun. You're nineteen live a little." I said and laughed and he joined in.

"Hey what are you guys laughing about?" Nicky chirped with her wet hair wrapped in a towel.

I shrugged. "That Chris needs to stop being a constipated old bastard and have fun for a change. What else?" We all burst out laughing.

"So, what were you doing out so long anyways?" I asked.

It was already getting dark out. I mean me and Nicky got the packing done, put away her ton of clothes, leaned Chris's surfboard against a wall in his room. Put out some random pictures to add to the ones that I already had. Some photos were of Chris, Nicky, and me and a few of our parents.

Oh and I neatly put all Chris's clothes away in the bureau. When it came to his porn collection I pretended not to see it…just kidding… Chris isn't into that stuff. At least I hope he's not, cuz who wants to think of their little brother watching some virtual action…ew. But there were some posters of scantily clad women in something I don't think covers enough to be called a bathing suit or underwear. Yeah, those I misplaced. I have no idea how they were torn into pieces in the garbage.

"I was out by the docks. I kinda just lost track of time." He paused. "I got invited to a party."

"Ooo, by who?" I asked.

"Shane Powers. That dude was a great surfer and then he just disappeared. And he was weird."

"A party, can I come?" Nicky asked Chris.

"No," he said with finality.

I kneeled on the couch, "Shane Powers. As in The Shane Powers? How bad can he be Chris? Honestly and I know where this party is I've been to one before…they're cool."

"You had a poster of him on your wall in high school. You need to get out and have fun!" Nicky said.

Chris looked at her cocking an eyebrow and she relented. "Okay, I need to have fun! Now get up!" Nicky said and grabbed Chris's hand and attempted to pull him off his lazy ass and have some actual fun.

"I'm not going to that party and neither are you." Chris said watching the surfing on the T.V.

"C'mon Chris, why don't you just go?" I admonished.

"There was something off about the dude. I mean he was one of the greatest surfers and then he just disappears? Who does that?" Chris said skeptically.

"Yeah, c'mon Chris? What could happen?" Nicky said tugging on his arm.

"You could have fun, that's what could happen, right Nicky?" I said smiling.

"Yeah, listen to our big sister Chris!" Nicky said. He just shook his head not relenting that's when my front door slammed open and the three of us jumped. The most terrifying thing stood in the doorway.

Aunt Jillian.

"You three are in for a treat." I Jillian said and the three of us looked at her like she forgot to take her meds today, she probably did. "The Goonies."

Nicky and Chris looked at her blankly and I stopped myself from rolling my eyes.

She said it like it explained everything. "Don't tell me you've never seen The Goonies. You are in for a very special treat." She said pulling out a DVD copy of The Goonies and a bag from Duncan Donuts.

"Um, we're going to a party." Chris said and Nicky and I both nodded our heads and that's how I ended up dragging my reluctant brother along with me and Nicky into a crowd of gyrating bodies.

"Well…Look who it is. Did you follow me here Chris?" I heard an obnoxious voice say and I glanced to the side and saw the owner of it and groaned. Jon.

"How's you're knee dickhead?" Chris taunted.

"Alright, enough!" I said. Chris rolled his eyes annoyed and Jon smirked.

"Long time, no see, Jess. Still leading your little brother around? When are you gonna drop him and have some real fun?" Jon said suggestively.

I shook my head and rolled my eyes, "Somebody's gotta be responsible. And you wouldn't know the first thing about fun since your head is shoved so far up your ass."

"I still know how to have fun. But I forgot you're not a little prude anymore." Jon leered.

I rolled my eyes, ignoring his eluding to me being a slut, which is the pot calling the kettle black, if you ask me, since he's a friggin manwhore. "Oh, so your hand has gotta be killing you. It sounds like you've been getting a lot of hand action since you're so very happy." I said and laughed.

"C'mon," I said to Nicky and Chris. Chris was ready to dive over the bar and rip Jon's head off. I gripped his arm and tried to pull him away.

"Hey Coley, you've really grown into yourself!" Jon called.

"Fuck off asshole!" Nicky called back to him.

"And keep up the Daisy Duke look, Jess!" Jon yelled over the music. I ignored it, being the bigger person.

"Okay, guys have fun. My boyfriend said he's here so I'm gonna go find him." I told them.

I pulled Nicky into a hug and whispered, "Just don't sleep with anyone tonight, 'kay, Nicky?" I said and kissed her cheek and she slapped my arm and laughed and I walked away.

I weaved my way through the crowd and looked around for Johnny. "C'mon, where are you," I whispered to myself.

"You know the first sign of insanity is talking to yourself?" Someone said from behind me and I turned around and was faced with that hot guy from the beach the last time I was here, Kyle.

"I'm okay with it. Without a little craziness, I would be soooo boring." I smiled at him. "I really gotta find my boyfriend though. I'll see you around I guess." I said walking away.

I pulled my phone from my back pocket when I felt it buzzing. I read it, sry babe the boys won't let me leave after the race. they wanna celebr8. c u l8er. ily

"Of course they wouldn't." Having my motorcross boyfriend constantly absent and being constantly reminded he has fucking girls always hanging all over him on these outings makes me feel just peachy.

And he's great to me. Tells me he loves me so often, but I know… really know… that he's fucking other girls. For a while it was amazing, but I think tonight was the final straw.

Someone bumped into my shoulder and I jumped. "Sorry," the guy said and he was looking straight toward Nicole.

"No problem, you like Nicole, huh?" I asked the guy. He was clean cut enough. His hair was on the longer side, but he looked like the type to be a cute dork, one you would meet in high school. He probably just graduated.

"How did you know?" He asked.

"I can tell. She's my baby sister." I informed him and he stiffened.

"Oh…um…I—" He stuttered out.

"No worries, I'm not gonna kill you or anything for going after my sister. But if you try anything she isn't diggin'," I paused my finger poking him in the chest, "you're gonna deal with me. And believe me; you do not want to mess with me." I threatened.

He nodded, looking like a scared puppy.

I linked my arm with his, feeling a little bad for scaring him. "So what's your name, kid?"

"Evan."

I smirked. "You're cute. Go get her before someone else does," I couldn't resist what I said next in an eerie sing song voice. "But, I'll be watching."

He nodded and I gently nudged him in her direction where she leaned looking at the ominous waters below. He carried two margaritas and a hopeful expression.

I turned around to be faced with, "Kyle," I gasped. "Jeez, are you trying to kill me?" I mocked holding a hand to my chest, because it was obvious by my accelerated heart beat that he surprised me.

"Nah," he said offhandedly. He had a video camera strapped around one of his hands.

"Getting anything interesting?" I asked.

"You could say that," a wicked grin spread across his face.

"A guy, being a perv, never fails, does it?" I tilted my head to the side.

"I don't know you tell me," he asked in a low husk.

"I'm gonna guess from the ample time you've had that camera focused down my shirt, I'm gonna say you have taste. But honey, if you wanted to see…"

I stopped. I stopped myself. I looked up into his eyes and well, danger is exciting. It's enticing. It's the reason you do what your parents tell you not to, so you can live and be free, and not care. I saw it shining in his eyes.

But I'm not carefree. I can't throw caution to the wind, Chris and Nicky live with me now… flirting, is whatever, but I can't do this… him with that incredible fire in his eyes. It'll be disaster.

I want to… oh god, I wanna fuck him until I can't remember my own name. That goddamn danger… I'm a junkie for it… but I can't have it because I need to stay rational. I'm not a hormone driven teenager anymore; I'm an adult that needs to provide a stable environment for my brother and sister.

"See what Jessie?" Kyle leaned forward.

"…through my shirt." I finished with something that definitely was not what I was gonna say. "It's easy enough being translucent with only a black bra beneath."

"That was not what you were about to say." He said matter-of-factly.

He got closer and whispered with an ever present grin, "you were gonna invite me to see just what's under that black bra."

I laughed, loud. "Kyle, I have a boyfriend."

"One that apparently ditched you tonight."

"Because he had plans." I made an excuse.

"To fuck some slut." He countered.

I looked down; knowing Johnny unfortunately had a weakness, for anything in a skirt. "Stop." I said softly.

"No, Jessie." He held onto my shoulders, his eyes boring into mine.

I pulled away roughly. "I'm outta here." I said and I pushed through the crowd and my friggin' luck who do I get confronted by but the dickhead, Jon.

"Where're ya goin' Jess," he leered at me. "The party's just warmin' up. Little Jessie afraid of the dark and gonna go home and hide?" He taunted.

"Terrified." I droll and roll my eyes. "Is it an impossible task to ask you to move, since I know being polite doesn't work?"

He stepped out of my way and then called after me, "Gonna leave without them?" He yelled over the pounding music.

I groaned. Damn, now I have to find them first lovely.

I heard squeals of disgust and horror behind further in the crowd. I rolled my eyes. You would think someone was gutted like a fish from the way they were screaming. These people.

I turned around and Jon was still there and had that sleazy smile plastered on his face. I stomped up to him and asked in a strained voice, "Have you seen Chris and Nicole?"

"Nope. Haven't seen them since you guys walked in." He said and I seethed. The lying bastard.

I glanced around, maybe I can find that kid, Evan, I think his name was. Maybe he would have seen at least Nicole, and then I could track down Chris. Oh, c'mon, where are you Evan, it would be nice if you—

"Wonder boy isn't here if that's who you're looking for." Jon said and I glanced up at him annoyed that he was still there, taking inventory of well, me, and it was freaking creep and gross. Sleazy, skin crawling worthy, grossness.

"Evan?" I asked and Jon just smirked and shook his head.

"Yeah, that kid you were intimidating a bit before he was going for Nicole—"

"I thought you didn't see her!" I said and crossed my arms.

"I guess I did. What'd ya know?"

"Asshole," I mumbled.

"She took a ride with Shane on his bike." Someone said from behind me. I looked and it was Kyle.

"Great." I heard the rumble of motorbike and followed the sound to the front. Nicole was getting off the back of the bike with Chris instigating a fight with Shane I could see it brewing. Chris has some built up aggression and is being incredibly overprotective, he's gonna end up hitting Shane if I don't do something.

"Chris," I said approaching my brother.

"Stay the hell away from my sister, asshole!" Chris looked like he was about to burst with rage.

"Chris," Nicky said, warning him, trying to calm him down but he just kept letting it build up.

"Nicole can take pretty good care of herself." Shane said and Chris punched him.

Kyle grabbed me from behind, restraining me from getting Chris. "Christopher," I glared at my younger brother and he glanced at me and my furious expression.

"Hey fellas why don't ya let us go and forget this all happened. It was all a big misunderstanding." I said loud and clear, I heard Kyle chuckle and felt his breath on the nape of my neck.

"Let 'em go." Shane said.

I walked up to Chris grabbed him by the arm and whispered in his ear, "You are gonna cool off. You're gonna take your car and drive you and Nicky home. Now!"

He grabbed Nicole harshly by the wrist and walked toward his red car. Nicky turned around glanced at Shane and then at me and mouthed 'thank you.' Chris needs to take a chill pill.

I turned toward the group of guys still there. "Sorry, about Chris. He's just a bit over protective of our sister… and if anything ever happened to her—" I shook my head, I couldn't think about that. "Just don't hurt my baby sister."

"You don't have to apologize for him," Shane started.

"Been doing it my whole life it's what big sisters are for," I smirked.

"Ah, well I won't hurt your sister." He said in that gravelly voice of his.

"Thanks." I said.

I walked backward toward my car and smiled at Shane, "Nice, to meet you by the way! I never thought I would actually meet you, Shane Powers, never mind watch my brother punch you in the face."

He laughed. "Nice to meet you too, Jessie."

"And I'm gonna reiterate this: don't hurt my sister, because I can guarantee, you'll regret it." I said lightly with a shrug, but despite my laid back way of speech, it was so fucking serious. If he hurt Nicky, the dude was as good as dust.

I turned around and was walking toward my car and getting in, only to turn the key and have my car stall. I hit my head on the steering wheel multiple times.

Perfect, just fucking perfect.

There was a knock on my window and I rolled it down. Kyle was standing there with a smile on his face the kind that never goes away. "If you messed with my baby you're dead." I growled and he laughed.

"No, but since you're having car troubles, do you need a ride?"

"Leave her here?"

"Your baby will be fine." He assured me.

"She better be. Hold on, let me just take a look under the hood first, maybe it's somethin' simple and I just having random car trouble." He moved aside and allows me to get out of the door. I opened the hood and the mechanics I knew from autoshop in high school were useless. You wanna know how to methodically do an autopsy, I'm your girl, but all that autoshop might as well been a million years ago.

"Ya know what I only live a few miles away. I can just walk no big deal." I said nonchalantly.

Kyle laughed. "What are you scared?" He taunted.

"No." I leaned back on the now closed hood of my car, "I just don't wanna be trouble."

"No trouble at all. And It's just a motorcycle." He shrugged with a smile.

"Ok, but if I die, I'll come back and take you with me." I threatened and climbed onto the back of his bike.

He laughed, "Can't argue with that." He sped off and I had my arms wrapped firmly around his waist. "You're hot as hell you realize that?"

I heard him and groaned. "Kyle…turn here." I have never chickened out in telling some dude to back off while I was with someone. But to be honest, Johnny screws me and goes out and screws the rest of the women that are all over him in every place he competes.

"That would be my stop. The house with the wrap-around pouch on the beach." I said and he pulled to a stop.

"So…" He said that ever present smirk was there, a shadow on his face.

I tilted my head to the side, "Maybe, we'll see each other again sometime. I don't know if Johnny and I will last much longer, but… I guess I'll see you around." Wow… so articulate, what am I in high school?

"See ya soon, Jessie." He said and stupid me did something really stupid. I leaned down to where he was on his bike, and I kissed him full on the lips. It wasn't just an innocent peck, full lip lock, tongue and all. Hell of a kiss.

"I am definitely gonna see you soon." He said and took off and glanced back with a wicked look in his eyes and a smirk on his face.

"Are you now?" I quirked a brow.

"Well, I know where you live, now don't I?"

"That was your plan all along. Find out where I lived so you could track me down?"

"Exactly." He was totally unashamed. And he smiled that sharp white smile.

"Goodnight, Jessie." And he took off on that bike.

I stood there for a minute. "So fucking hot."