DISCLAIMER: I don't own D. Gray Man.

Rating: M

IOU

xXx

Just why was I stuck here? Normally, I wouldn't of given a flying fucking shit, but this was bull.
No screw that, I still didn't care, but someonewas blackmailing me into doing it for him. It wasn't my fault the stupid beansprout is oblivious and dunderheaded, and down right dense. It wasn't my fault he didn't have a father to tell him, or a guardian! He had CROSS, Cross fucking Marian! You'd think he'd learn a thing or two!

"Why in fucking hell would I do that!?"

"Because you're nice?" Lavi tried.

"Try again." If he didn't come up with something soon, I was going to strangle him.

"You secretly adore Allen?" I cracked my knuckles.

"You secretly are in love with ME?" I pulled Mugen of out it's sheath.

"Because-"

The rest is fucking history, because regardless of what he said, I still have to fucking do it. It's not my fucking job!

"Kanda, I already know that!" Allen said blushing. Fucking twat, what is wrong with him? All I told is where it goes!

"Listen, you need to put it in there, or else you just look stupid." Allen stuck his tongue out. Immature brat!

"No I don't, I could put in there!" Allen pointed at the other hole. Damn that kid is a retard, it wouldn't fucking fit there.

"No, that's wrong! It needs to go there, or else it's not the same."

"Not the same, but still works!" I growled, and he glared.

"Damnit, if you're not going to listen to me, you can just figure it out your self!"

Allen snarled, but called me back. Idiot. "Fine, just don't be so mean!"

"I'll do whatever I fell like doing."

"BaKanda..."

"Okay listen you dumbfuck, this lace goes through here, like this" I pulled the lace through hole, and twisted the other lace around pulling it into a bow.

"Oh. I get it now." I pulled it out, and he, miraculously, tied it correctly.

"If you ever need help again. Stay the fuck away from me."

If you must know what Lavi had said, it was this.

"Because-" Lavi paused, "IOU, that's what, anything you want."

"Anything?"

"Anything! Just please, he's so difficult!"

"Head." Lavi looked puzzled.

"What the hell are you talking about?"

I repeated "HEAD." A moment later it clicked, and Lavi blushed. "F-fine."


A/N: There you go, a yaoi not being a yaoi, and a not yaoi being yaoi. If I had the authority to contradict myself, it wouldn't of happened. But it did. YAY Contradictions!