A/N: I'm sooo sorry everybody! I know you are probably not too happy because I haven't updated in a while but I do have reasons. Over the weekend I was swamped with homework because all of my teachers just love to assign that stuff. And then on Monday I had an asthma attack and I spent my entire afternoon at the doctor and when I got home I wasn't exactly up to writing. Basically all week I have been swamped with work. I know that that's not a good excuse but I really am sorry… forgive me b/c its my birthday? (The 13th)… anyways here's the chapter… I hope you like it…
Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight… even though I wish I did.
It had been a week since my family and I had arrived in Forks and it was also my first day of school. Since that first day in Forks, I couldn't bring myself to look further into my past like I had intended to. That day in the meadow, feeling Edward there with me, seeing him, it had really taken a toll on me. I couldn't bear the pain of losing him and that's what ripped through me when I realized he wasn't there.
Since that day, I have been hanging around the house, keeping to myself. I knew that it was hurting my family because they could see my pain, or at least some of it. But I never let them see my full pain. I never allowed myself to let them see how much I missed my Edward, how much I really needed him.
So today was the first day of school. It was the day when I would have to be brought back into my memories of Edward. I knew that this would be most painful, since we had spent so much time in those dreaded halls. It was where we met and I wasn't sure if I would be able to take the memories that would come with being back there. I knew I had to go though, for my family.
With that thought, Gina and Molly charged into my room.
"Come on Bella! Get up! We need to get ready for school," Gina yelled at me while pulling me out of bed. I looked over to see Molly digging through my closet, set on finding me something to wear to school. I was pretty sure that I wouldn't like what she picked out for me either.
"Guys, do you really have to dress me for school today? I don't care what I look like. It's not really that important anyways," I complained, knowing I was fighting without any chance of winning.
With that, Molly came out of my closet saying, "Bella it is important! We need to make a good first impression! Especially since we are meeting all of the Cullen kids today at school. You wouldn't want them to think you're a slob, now would you?"
I was about to say that I didn't care when Gina cut me off. "Don't even say it Bella. Now take this and go get dressed! No complaining! Hurry up!" Gina handed me my outfit, which consisted of a cute long sleeved dark blue V-neck top and a mini skirt. I knew there was no point in arguing with them further so I hurried and got myself dressed and went back into my room. Although I protested, Gina and Molly applied a little makeup to my face, but not much. When I looked at myself, I couldn't find it in me to complain. I really did look good after all. With that we met Nicholas and Chris downstairs and headed off for school.
We all got into Nicholas' Chevy Malibu, the least extravagant of the cars, and headed off for school. Molly sat shotgun next to her mate while Gina, Chris, and I all climbed into the back. Because of Nicholas speeding down the roads, we arrived at school only a few minutes after, when it should have taken us at least ten minutes.
As I stepped out of the car, I looked up at the school that I had attended 90 years ago and was not surprised to see it looked the same as it had back then. You could tell there was a little remodeling where it was needed but it still looked the same. I felt the memories of the school coming back to me and almost took off back for home again.
No. I thought to myself. You cannot just leave. Think of what it will do to your family. Think of how hurt they will be to see you hurt. You can do this Bella. You can do this. He would have wanted you to do this.
With that, I took a deep breath and headed with my family for the school. The place I had been dreading going back to the most.
It was the first day of school at Forks High. Great. I couldn't imagine going to that dreaded place without my precious Bella but I knew I had to. I had to for my family because I knew that if I didn't, they would regret coming here even though I requested it. I knew a few of them already did, they just hadn't admitted it out loud yet. Not that that mattered when I could read their mind.
I knew that this past week I had put my family through the most I have in a long time but I couldn't help it. Being here was harder than I thought it would be. I'm remembering her more than ever now and it's getting hard to bear knowing that she will not just show up and be here. I was pulled out of my thoughts when my pixie of a sister shouted up at me.
"Edward come on let's go! We need to get to school already! We can't be late on our first day and besides, the Nelluc's are going to be at school with us today! It's their first day too now COME ON!" she shouted up the stairs at me. I climbed off my bed and headed down the stairs, getting ready to leave for my day at school with my siblings.
When I came to the landing, I realized that everyone was waiting for me so we all started for the car. I took my Volvo, which Alice and Jasper climbed into along with me, while Emmett and Rosalie decided to go in Rose's M3. We arrived at school quickly and as soon as I set my eyes on it, I was taken aback by the pain I felt. Jasper was quick to send me a wave of happiness and calm which I thanked him for. Knowing that I would have to go into the school eventually, I climbed out of the car and went along with my siblings inside towards the main office to start our day at our new school.
Emmett, Jasper, Rosalie were posing to be seniors while Alice and I were juniors. We all made our way to the office where we were met with the lustful eyes of the secretary as she gave us our schedules. I quickly looked over my schedule, comparing it with Alice and realized I had math and Spanish with her. The rest of my classes I would be by myself—great—that means outrageous teenage girls with their hormones lusting for me. I shuddered at the thought. The good news was that all of my siblings had lunch together so we would be safe then.
We all parted and I made my way to my locker. I looked down at the number and froze.
"What's wrong Edward?" Alice asked me when she noticed my tension.
"It's nothing… I just… I have her old locker," I explained to her.
"It's ok Edward, everything will get easier and better soon, I promise," she said to me while giving me a hug.
"I don't think so Alice. It won't be ok as long as I can't be with my Angel." After I said this Alice just smiled and headed the other way.
I wonder what she knows that she isn't telling me. She still is blocking her thoughts from me. Ugh. You know how much I hate that Alice! I thought bitterly to myself as I put my books away and headed to my first class. As I walked into my class, I noticed every girl stop and stare at me. Without even looking into their minds I knew they were undressing me with their eyes and fanaticizing about me.
Great! This is going to be a long day!
This was how my next few classes went as well. The bell rang to signal the end of my last class before lunch and I hurried out before I could be ambushed by the group of girls who were already fawning over me. That was when I saw it. I looked ahead of me and I saw someone who looked exactly like my angel, only she looked miserable. I stared in awe for a moment before I saw her run off at a human pace.
No. it couldn't be her. She's not here anymore. Wow Edward! You must be seeing things. Ugh. I can't take this anymore! I can't stay here. This is just going to get worse.
And with that thought I headed out away from the school. I knew that Alice would know that I left so I didn't bother to tell my siblings I was leaving. I had to get away from this place before these memories overwhelmed me. I had been seeing people who looked like her all day. They looked like her, but only until they turned around. But what did I just see now? She looked so much like my angel. But she couldn't be. My Bella was gone, taken from me. I knew this. Maybe I just need to prove this to myself in my mind.
That is when I made the decision of where I was going. I decided to go and see Bella. I decided it was time for me to visit her grave. Maybe this closure would help me from seeing her all over this town while we were here, while I was looking for answers. I hope so. And with that I started running towards the cemetery, not bothering to take the Volvo.
This day was going on forever. Not only was almost every guy in this school hitting on me and lusting for me, I was seeing him everywhere. I saw him in different people throughout the day. To make everything even worse, I had his old locker. I knew I would be missing Edward a lot at this school.
Finally my morning classes were over and it was time to meet my family for lunch. I was happy to finally be able to see my wonderful family after having to deal with these humans all morning. Plus I believe that we were going to see the Cullens today. I know Nicholas was extremely excited about that because he wanted to see that man he found again.
I was heading towards the cafeteria when I saw him. I saw his beauty and grace but I was surprised to see that same pained expression on his face, as it had been in the meadow.
This is just another memory of him… the most powerful of all of the memories, but still a memory nonetheless. But why is my memory seeing him so sad? Usually I see him smiling that crooked smile I love so much. I can't take that look on his face. I just can't.
With that thought I headed out of this school, away from the memories, away from the pain. I had to get away from it all. I started running and I knew where I was going immediately. I wasn't sure if it was the best thing for me at the moment but I needed this. I was headed for the cemetery. I needed to see Edward—at least as much as I could.
After running for a few minutes I was at the cemetery. Now it was only a matter of finding him. I knew this would be painful but I also hoped it would help me put this a little more behind me. I reminded myself why I wanted to come to Forks in the first place—I needed the closure. I needed to see if I could live without Edward since he wasn't coming back and to do that I needed to say goodbye. Maybe finding his grave would help with my goodbye. I was hoping so.
Finally I came across his grave. It read:
Beloved Child, Strong Heart, Greatly Missed
I fell to my knees as I saw his grave but what really put me into shock was what was next to it—it was my grave.
True Angel, Loved Dearly, May She Rest in Peace
I started sobbing at this site. Our parents had put us next to each other. I looked to the other side of my gravestone and saw that my parents were on that side while Edward's parents were next to him as well. I knew at this point that it was really over. My Edward was really gone. I couldn't handle this fact any longer so I took off towards the house, knowing that my family would be getting home from school soon. As I left the graveyard though, I could have sworn I heard my angel whisper in a troubled voice, "Bella."
I arrived at the grave yard at started looking for my angel's grave. When I finally found it I gasped as I read the inscription and saw placed next to her graves, not only her parents, but me. I was touched that our parents had put us next to each other but I found myself wondering why they buried an empty coffin. I fell to the ground at the site of my angel's final resting place and started sobbing.
"Bella," I whispered. "Bella, no, please." I knew it was no use but I could not help myself. I missed my Bella, now more than ever. I knew at that moment that I would not just get over her. I would be cursed to always walk this earth alone thinking about Bella—the only one I ever have and ever will love.
I stayed at the graveyard for a little longer until I realized I needed to get home. I vaguely remembering Carlisle telling us that the Nelluc's were going to come and see us tonight so that I could catch up with Nicholas and everyone could meet them. With that thought, I pulled myself up and headed home. All I really wanted to do was bask in my depression but I knew I couldn't. I owed this to my family so I headed home and readied myself to meet our new—or maybe old—acquaintances.
I got home in just enough time to put on a fresh pair of clothes when I heard the Nelluc's car pull up. Knowing they would be here soon, I headed down into the living room to ready myself for another night of torture without my Bella.
When I got home, I was greeted by Gina telling me to get ready to go see the Cullen's. I had forgotten in my sorrow that we were going over there tonight. I readied myself and we headed out toward the Cullen's. As we pulled up toward the house I prepared myself for another night of "happiness" with my family (and now our new acquaintances) all being without my love, my Edward.
So that is my chapter. In case you didn't catch it, Gina, Bella, Molly, Chris, and Nicholas's last name is Nelluc… see where I got it from? :D also I know you probably want Edward and Bella to meet up… don't worry… that's all to come in the next chapter… if you have any ideas for me I would love to hear them.
Ok so what did you think? Was it alright and everything? I hope I didn't disappoint you too much. Please let me know your thoughts by reviewing… the reviews really are a great inspiration… they inspire me to write. I know this sounds greedy after I just didn't update for a while but I'm asking for 10 reviews before I continue… can I get that? Thank you to everyone who is reading this and thank you for all who have reviewed. You guys make my day with your reviews! :D Thanks! Review please!
PS… Also I need some special abilities for the Nelluc's. I already have Bella's power but I need some for the rest of them. Any Ideas? Please let me know and if I use your idea I will give you full credit for it. Thanks :D