Part Two

April 22nd 1932

9:23 p.m.

I opened my eyes carefully. Opening them up, I hoped what had just happened was just a dream. A dream that was a wish my heart didn't make. As my pupils adjusted and my eye lids fluttered, I stretched. My hands hit something hard. I looked up to see a book on a pillow. I then realized that I was on a bed. I sat up, but too quickly because I started to get lightheaded. I stayed in that position until the queasiness was over.

Finally, I picked up the book. And felt the texture of it. It felt like… it felt like… It was. I looked at the cover of it and it read: DO NOT TOUCH MY JOURNAL/DIARY/FEELINGS OF CONSENT BOOK. This is Minnie's. I laughed silently. This was mine. This was my journal or diary or feeling of consent book. I remember when I wrote that and what I wrote in it. It was all a lie what I wrote. Just to make my life seem more interesting, even though in the end it became the most interesting.

There was a soft splatter of knocking on the door to my dormitory room. I got up and inched it open. There looking at me with worried eyes and lips ready for condolences were my best friends, or so I hope. I sighed, exaggerating the end of it and let them in. They gradually walked in and sat on the bed where they just stared at me until someone opened their mouths to talk.

"Minnie, Albus ran after you. He's the one who carried you to the dorms. We then carried you up here to your bed. After that, we decided that you need to review the year, since you know…you're leaving," Marian said slowly.

"OH MINNIE!" My other best friend Miranda ran to me and we hugged.

Marian joined us eventually and tears started to come from each and every one of us. We stopped, sniffed, and disjointed. We looked at each other's faces and laughed. I looked at my two best friends whom I thought had abandoned me when I needed them the most. Now, I saw that they didn't abandon me, just didn't know what to do. They were lost. They were just being… humans. That's all they were being.

Marian brought the feeling of consent book over to me and placed it in my hand. I sighed and she nodded. I nodded back and looked at Miranda. She smiled a smile of encouragement. Telling myself to do it, I opened the book and grinned goofily at the smell rising from it. It smelled like it has always smelled. It smelled… I dunno… it just smelled good to me. I looked at the two women standing in front of me and smiled at them; they smiled back.

I reached out to hug them again when something fell out of the book. I picked it up and it was a picture. It was a picture of us. The 3 M's, they called us and the three M's we'll stay. I felt my cheeks go wet and I saw that theirs had gone wet too. We laughed, again. And this time, after we finished the raindrops from our eyes, my two best friends left. They knew I needed some time alone, knowing that tonight was my last night here at Hogwarts.

10:00 p.m.

I flipped through the pages slowly, reminiscing over the way I wrote and how excited I was. I blinked back the unwanted tears. I was unsteady on my feet, so sat down. I turned back to the first page. I breathed in and out like the breath I took earlier at the prognosticated meeting. My hands trembled over the page and indented words of ink. My eyes wandered back up to the first line, the first date, the first lie.

What I had written was the basic truth with some twists. How I met Albus was right, but how he talked to me as a lie. Within the entry I had said that Albus winked at me and gave me a sly smirk. He said he loved my name and Malcolm Malcolm's name was weird but in a good way and that it could be cooler than ice in the future. That Albus could be so corny at times.

I continued to read on to a part that sent my senses flying and churned my intestines. It was the part in which that told how attracted I was to Albus, the new Transfiguration at Hogwarts. It told how he had an assistant, Bob, who was a best friend and that I thought they were two peas in a pod, a total package.

I closed my eyes and swallowed my vomit that had built up in my throat. I started to think about my foolish and girlish accusations about the new teacher in the beginning of the year had led me to where I was now. I am not proud of what I did now. Though, I do not regret it.

I reopened the books lowly and came to an entry within the same month the first one was in, September. This one was about a week or so after, the week I started to notice that the other girls were getting attention than me and I thought that they weren't his type. These girls were the girls with curls, the girls that pranced around in front of his face. It was the entry I had started to get jealous in. Jealousy was the trait that drove me to the next thing I did.

Within the next entry I read, I had asked my best friends to make me over. They enjoyed redoing my hair, my style, my look. I remember back in the summer I noticed that they were becoming one with the fad that I had implored them not to give in to. And now that I think about it, maybe they got into it the same way I did, through jealousy. They were jealous of how the guys were looking at the other girls, jealous of the way the other girls got treated and jealous…jealous of everything.

I felt a tear trying to break through my strong barrier I had built while reading my old journal. So many old feelings were rushing back. So many old confusions, confessions, lies, and deceptions! Before I had known it, I had let out a lonely sob. I looked around the room to see if I had woken anyone up, there wasn't a soul in the room. I smiled knowing that my best friends had cleared it out for me.

My tears had suddenly cleared up and I started to read my journal again. It had seemed that the next entry I wrote was full of excitement. Most of the handwriting was in scribbles but I could understand it.

My scribbles were telling of how zealous I was. I had just found out that Albus was having tutoring for people who were having trouble in Transfiguration. I then start to notice that my handwriting was becoming clearer. I had said that I couldn't go to tutoring because I was one of the top students of my class. Then, I had said I was going to start to fail on purpose just to get close to him.

When I read that I got furious with myself. I stood up and kicked my bed sending immediate pain shooting through my whole body.

'Stupid, stupid, stupid', I thought.

The tutoring sessions is what started it all. But on October 31st was when things got out of hand at one the helping lessons. That tutoring period, I had kissed Albus. I could remember it like it was yesterday…

Flashback

The cup had finally turned into a book with feathers on it. I opened the feather-bounded book and doves flew out. I jumped as they continued to flow out of the book and fly around the room in white waves. Albus laughed at me and clapped.

"Well done Minerva."

"Thank you Albus."

"Well, I think we're done for today."

Albus closed the book and turned it back into a cup full of feathers. I just stared at the cup as he continued to talk. Before I had known it, I had zoned out. My mind was completely somewhere else and my eyes were glazing over. My brain was entering another world, full of doves and imagination. There were fairies and talking animals. Our houses' mascots were real and we were nymphs of some kind learning from them. I was looking directly at a lion with a face of Albus. So beautiful he was. I could hear him calling my name: "Minerva…MINERVA!"

I jumped out of my trance. I blinked and saw Albus looking at me strange, like he was pondering about something. He sat down next to me and felt my forehead with the back of his hand. He looked into my eyes and asked me were I okay. I nodded. And then something happened that I thought never would happen.

Albus cupped my cheek. I felt how soft and smooth his hands were as he rubbed his thumb against my cheek lovingly. I closed my eyes and sighed, leaning into his hand. He whispered my name again, this time his voice was soft and husky. I whispered his. I heard him lean in and I did too. Before I could think, I acted. I was kissing my professor like we were lovers.

"Hey, Al! Oh…oops. Sorry."

We quickly jumped apart to see Albus' friend and teacher assistant, Bob, run out of the classroom. I looked at Al who looked worried and got up. I stumbled and tripped while running out of the classroom. I can't believe what I had just done.

End of flashback

1:05 a.m.

Thunder interrupted me and my reminisce of the past. I shook my head and looked out the window. It was starting to rain. I walked over to the window with the diary still in my hand. My fingers touched the fogged up glass. It was ice cold. I leaned my head against it and looked out towards the lake. There was so much rain pouring down that you could hardly see it or the baby willow tree.

I sat on the small chair next to the window and reopened the book. I came to the entry that was dated November 13th. It was the Friday that we went to Hogsmeade and Albus and I first speaking since the day we had kissed back in October. That day we expressed our feelings towards each other.

I had no idea that the conversation was going to lead us to other secret meetings and non-mundane conversing. And that there were going to be cryptic messages every time our eyes met. The only people that knew about all of this were my friends and Bob. They were actually the ones who helped us keep it underground; they were cheering it seemed like it…well, at first.

2:35 a.m.

It was almost 2:40 in the morning and I was still reading my little journal. I had covered all of our secret dates and lies to our acquaintances that surrounded us. I was on the entry before the last. It was the day we got caught. It was the day all of our hard work started falling down slowly. That day was the slowest day of my life. From the moment we got caught to the moment I was called to the office to get reprimanded was at a slow pace. That day I was the worst day of my life.

Flashback

I was meeting Albus at our usual spot, in the classroom that had gotten burnt up before the first Hogsmeade trip. Everyone had forgotten about it, even the teachers that were supposed to repair it. I was running late. I had a gut feeling this was going to mess us up, but I wanted to see him so bad. I jogged into the classroom, not seeing that Valencia Robertson was following me.

I closed the door behind me once I got in. Albus rushed up to me and started kissing me everywhere on my face. He held my face in his hands.

"Where have you been Minnie, my love?"

"I'm sorry, I woke up late and-"

"That's okay. We need to talk Minerva."

"What?"

"Minnie, I think someone's on to us."

"What!"

"I know…it's just…be careful when you talk and where."

"Okay."

I leaned in to give him a kiss. He gave in quickly to the kiss. I could feel the passion in his kisses. It made me melt. Right when I was beginning to get into the symbol of affection, the door slammed open. I gasped and hopped out of Albus' grip. I looked behind us and saw Valencia Robertson with her mouth open and a furious facial expression upon her face. She was full of rage.

"I KNEW IT! YOU ! I'M TELLING HEADMASTER MCKINELY!"

And with that she slammed the door. I was pretty sure she was running towards the headmaster's office at full speed. All I could do was stand there and stare at the door that was burnt so many days ago. I felt a soft sob come from me. Albus held me, not even running after is infuriated student that was going to ruin our whole relationship. I don't want us to be broken apart. I love him.

End of flashback

2:40 a.m.

As I fell back out of the flashback, I couldn't help but wonder if Albus would've ran after her, what would've happened. There were millions of questions popping into my head. What if…Why…When… But now, it doesn't matter. In a matter of hours, I will be leaving Hogwarts, forever.

I silently closed the diary, not wanting to see it for a moment. I looked outside again. It was no longer pouring, it was just drizzling. The rain might've stopped, but my tears haven't. Memories flash through my bran of the past year. The pain, the miscommunication, the tears, the love, the joy, the friendships, the backstabbing, the everything as racing trying to be the last to pop into my brain to make me feel worse.

And one of the memories did. It was of the first time at Hogsmeade. The one moment in which everybody who was part of the whole complicity was at one place, at one time. I wiped my tears with my robes and reopened the journal to the last entry, April 12th:

April 12th 1932

Yesterday, Albus and I got caught in the act. Today, we were called to the Headmaster's office. There the Headmaster told us when the punishment was to take place for our actions. During all of this I stayed silent. I don't' even think I breathed. I just took the reprimand like a woman.

Ever since yesterday, my friends haven't talked to me. I can't believe they would turn their backs on me like they have. How am I supposed to stay in one piece without them or without Albus? I don't know. Today, I thought I was going crazy. Now, I realize, I am.

3:00 a.m.

Closing the book, I sighed. That was the last entry. I stood up and stretched. I slowly walked over to my bed and lied down. I laid the book right next to me. I snuggled up to my pillow and cried. I remembered the past week and a half and remembered feeling lonely like I do now. I remembered the rumors about me being pregnant and wanting to take Albus' money and that's why I started flirting with him. There were so many rumors going around about what was happening that only a third of them were close to the real thing.

Tears were flowing unto my pillow so quickly that it almost matched the pouring rain from the earlier rainstorm. I thought about the agony I will face tomorrow. I thought might as well fall asleep until the Dawn opens her eyes and comes out with her rosy cheeks. I continued into think until my thoughts took me to sleep.