Disclaimer: I do not own dragon ball Z or any of the characters from the show, I am only borrowing three of them.
Title: IWFYITA (I wanna fuck you in the ass)
Description: Crack fic between Trunks, Goku and Vegeta.
Pairing: Hinted G/V.
Summary: Big trouble for little Vegeta when he stumbles over his son and the new mp3 player.
"Text" - Speech
~Text~ - Thoughts
Finally having finished with his rigorous training for the day, Vegeta towelled the sweat off of his face as he walked down the halls of Capsule Corporation. Turning a corner, the prince then descended the numerous stairs where he eventually met his destination of the kitchen. As he stepped into the room, the prince suddenly halted. The reason for his abrupt stop was simple. His teenage son, Trunks, was listening to some blaring music on his new mp3 player. He could not hear the words but the beat was starting to annoy him. With a twitch in his eye, Vegeta threw his towel onto the floor.
"Brat!" The prince shouted out in annoyance as he stalked toward the fridge situated not far from where the demi saiyan was sat at the table, waiting for the other's acknowledgement.
Trunks sat there moving his head in time with the beat of the song, seemingly unaware of his father's presence because of how loud the music was blaring in his ears. Suddenly, he felt something hard slam into the back of his head. Trunks spun around in anger, grabbing his earphones that had nearly fallen out at the force of the hit. What the demi saiyan came face to face with, froze the poor teen to the spot. There his father was, with barely an inch or two between them and an irate look glued to his features.
"D-dad!" he stuttered in shock, music still blasting in his ears but quickly forgotten with his fear of his senior in a bad mood.
Vegeta pulled his hand back, a water bottle clenched tightly in his fist - which had been the weapon of choice used to strike Trunks on the back of the head-. The prince narrowed his eyes. "What the fuck is that annoying shit that you are listening to?!" he demanded with a harsh tone. Vegeta then watched with quiet satisfaction as the boy took the ear phones off and the volume went down a few notches. That was more like it!
"It's…" Trunks paused, not sure if he could really tell his father the name of this particular song he was listening to.
"Well!?" Vegeta growled, arms crossed tensely over his chest now and Trunks could easily see the vein on his father's head throbbing with barely controlled anger as he waited not so patiently for the answer.
With a bright red flush of embarrassment, Trunks mumbled the answer out.
"What was that?"
Licking his lips, Trunks looked up, feeling ever so the eight year old child once again. "I-I said… I wanna fuck you in the ass."
"You what?!" Vegeta bellowed and flashed into super saiyan. He quickly gripped his son by the front of his shirt. "You dare to say that to me?" he snarled and clenched a fist in anger. His face and Trunks' own were barely a few centimetres from one another now. "Now, tell me the name of the damn song before I blast you all the way to Kakarott's house!" he threatened.
Trunks looked up with wide startled blue eyes and flashed into super saiyan to protect himself, meanwhile his earphones fell from his ears, landing neatly to hang from his shoulders. "I-I" he managed to gasp out, eyes diverting to the clenched fists holding his shirt and then back to the fury filled face knowing his father would make good of his promise if he didn't explain.
"No stuttering brat, just tell me the damn name of this shit so I can make sure you never listen to it again!" Vegeta commanded as his anger continued building by the second and ready to erupt at any moment on the poor demi saiyan.
Trunks bit his lip nervously and tried to pull back. He may have been the same size as his father now but the man could still scare the hell out of him.
Slowly opening his mouth, Trunks was just about to answer when a flicker caught his eye and he looked towards the left of the room for the source.
Goku stood in confusion at the scene in front of him. "What's going on?" he asked, taking in the pose of father and son. "I felt your ki's spike and came to see if there was a problem," he said of way of explanation.
Trunks opened his mouth once more, this time to reply to Goku. Before he could say anything though, his father interrupted.
"The brat thinks that he has the right to declare that he can..." Vegeta's eye twitched and the vein on his head started throbbing as he trailed off. The prince was practically at the end of his tether now.
Trunks gasped and shook his head. "H-honestly father, that was not what I meant, I was just saying that-" he tried to explain, unintentionally ignoring Goku for the moment.
"That you want to fuck me in the ass?" Vegeta growled, his eyes narrowing and a large ki blast quickly growing in his hand and increasing in size by the second.
"N-no! That is not what I mean father, I was just telling you that-"
"Wow." Came the shocked words from the third class saiyan who had moved closer now and grabbed Vegeta's wrist, pulling him back away from Trunks and thankfully causing the blast to dissipate in Vegeta's shock. "You really said you wanted to fuck Vegeta in the ass?" Goku asked as he stared with an unreadable expression at the young purple haired prince.
Trunks groaned and shook his head. "That was not what I meant!" he shouted out finally before either got to interrupt him this time.
Jet black and teal eyes turned onto the poor demi saiyan. One was staring at him with confusion filled eyes and the other staring with anger and disbelief.
Trunks gave a huge sigh and slipped his head phones off from his shoulders. Walking the few steps over to his still enraged parent he quickly slipped the headphones over his father's head. "This is the song I am listening to. 'I want to fuck you in the ass.'" He repeated and waited for said words to happen on the song.
Taking a step back as he was still unsure of the way his father's mood could go, Trunks waited. A bead of sweat dripped down his forehead as his father seemed to listen to the song for what felt like forever, but it was really only a few seconds at most.
After the desired words had been mentioned in the song, Vegeta reached up and took the headphones off. He was irritated but he understood now that his son did not actually mean he wanted to fuck him, prince Vegeta and father to said demi, in the ass. "Hn." Was the single 'reply' Trunks got before the royal threw the headphone and mp3 player onto the floor and stomped out of the kitchen. He did not care if the technology broke from impact. ~Good riddance.~ he thought.
With his mood ruined, Vegeta was itching for another round in his gravity machine. "Kakarott!" he snarled, expecting the saiyan third class to follow him so he could try to beat the innocent third party into the ground.
As Goku watched Vegeta's form slowly disappeared from sight, he scratched his head sheepishly. "Just a second 'Geta!" he shouted out. Quickly turning back to the purple haired demi, Goku walked the few steps to where Trunks was once again sitting. "Do you think I could… borrow your mp3 player?" he cocked his head and asked in a too innocent manner.
Moving his gaze away from glaring at his lunch, Trunks cocked a pale lavender eyebrow. "Uh… sure?" he answered and sweatdropped at the huge grin and the sudden disappearance of Goku. Glancing towards the area on the floor that had held his mp3 player, Trunks was shocked that Goku had managed to somehow grab it and disappear within a second of his reply. "I wonder why he wants it?" he asked himself and groaned as a loud explosion was heard from the gravity room causing the poor house to shake.
A week had passed since the incident with Trunks Briefs and his father. Goku grinned happily as he sat in his home listening to the song he had gotten from Trunks a week prior. He had listened to the song over and over until he knew the lyrics. Giggling rather girlishly to himself, Goku stood up and turned the volume on the mp3 down low. With his wife not at home, Goten with Trunks and Gohan at school, Goku was ready to test his plan. Belting out the lyrics, Goku sang happily till the song ended and he was not disappointed in his week of training to learn the words off by heart. Raising two fingers to his forehead, Goku disappeared from his seat on his bed and reappeared in the living room of capsule corp. He had had to lock on Vegeta's ki so he knew the other was somewhere in said room and would easily hear his 'beautiful' romantic gesture.
Taking a deep breath and opening his mouth up widely, Goku started belting out the tune of the song, loudly and out of tune, with no mp3 player to help guide him through the words or beat as he had left it at home on purpose.
Hearing that terrible song once again, Vegeta snapped his eyes open and his fists clenched. "KAKAROTT! Why in the hells are you singing that annoying song?" he snarled and jumped over the couch that he had been laying on out of boredom and drinking a bottle of cold water after a three hour training session in his gravity room. Slowly, Vegeta started stalking towards Goku with a dangerous glint in his eyes. It was the same glint the prince always got when he was ready to kill someone.
Goku, with an inward grin, tried to look innocent and cocked his head. "But 'Geta, I am not singing an annoying song." He paused and gave wide puppy dog eyes before his orbs narrowed in his trademark battle stare. "I really wanna fuck you in the ass."