Title: Champions of Lilith

Chapter1 – It's Santa! Steal His Bag!

Ship: H/Hr/L, Nev/Susan

Key: "Speech", 'Thoughts', "Speech laden with magic", §Parsletongue§

Genre: Dark Comedy – This will be filled with comedic moments, but have a darker tone of story.

Rating: M – Mature: Harry, Hermione and Luna will take proactive measures to kill the bad guys, sometimes in very messy ways. They were all three in a relationship before going back, so will be as soon as they return and will have sex (though not immediately). There will be assassinations, executed by the trio. The story is meant to have a darker history, but more comedic second go-through and be a fun, fluffy, romantic and even naughty romp.

Challenge: Yes


[Full Summary and Details:] - This is the first chapter I've written for my own challenge "Champions of Lilith". Details can be found on the forum in my profile and anyone may take up this challenge, even taking this first chapter to use. The Harry/Hermione/Luna relationship must remain the same, as must everything brought up in this chapter such as Ron's betrayal and the marriage, which should be done within the first month of summer.

This is set ten years after what would have been Harry's seventh year at Hogwarts. Voldemort has taken control over the wizarding world, and the muggle from behind the scenes, killing off and testing on any magical creature he could find for various reasons, mostly for immortality and making himself better, physically and magically (get all the benefits from all races and none of the drawbacks.)

Lilith, the Fairy Queen, sends Santa, her most powerful fae in relation to controlling time after imbuing him with with the magic and life force of all of her children, to meet with Harry, Hermione and Luna; the last known survivors of any form of resistance against Voldemort. With that much power, he sends Harry, Hermione and Luna back in time under Lilith's orders so they can stop Voldemort and save her children, as she is only alive while they exist, and they were nearly extinct.

This is a strictly gray story, for sure, where Harry, Hermione and Luna were forced to stay in hiding for eight years, only coming out to kill Death Eaters when they could. Hermione's parents tortured, killed and left as a message to Hermione, even from Australia after Ron turns against them.

Slightly Manipulative!Good!Dumbledore, Evil!Ron, Evil!Ginny, Evil!Molly, Good!Asshole!Snape

WARNING: Slight changes to Canon book seven and then everything that happens from the point of Ron leaving Harry and Hermione. Lots of lemons, assassinations and murder. Some torture of bad guys and lots of sexual innuendo, pranks and scaring the heck out of baddies. I say no forced naughties with the main characters, that doesn't count towards when Luna plays rough and wants to tie up Harry. Changes from Canon will be explained in-story in chapter. Mostly, it's that Ron never comes back and Luna is saved by Harry and Hermione before the Snatchers get her.

Full explanation of time line and their "history" in the last half of the chapter when they give full disclosure.

The idea for the Potters to have been burglars borrowed from Rorschach's Blot.

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any other crossover I may intentionally or unintentionally create. By reading this story, you understand this disclaimer and understand that it holds true for this story in whole, and in part, throughout the entirety of the story from this location or any other in which the story itself is placed, regardless of a disclaimer being on future chapters.

Recommended Story of the Chapter: "Partially Kissed Hero" by Perfect Lionheart (H/Hr/L, about to turn Harry/Hermione/Luna/Susan Bones)


Hermione stretched her neck and cuddled against Harry, her lover of the past seven years as they read one of his family's books on enhancement rituals. It had been a book that they had found underneath of Potter Manor, hidden in a large vault filled with antiques and ancient tomes far beyond what she had ever seen even within the vaunted library of Hogwarts before its fall.

"It's a shame you took our virginities a long time ago," she groused to Harry, pointing at the book with a sarcastic frown. "This one would have increased our power nearly ten times."

Harry nodded and squeezed the lovely brunette in a hug. "Yes, it's certainly one of the more powerful ones we've found. But I wouldn't have given it up for anything."

Hermione smiled up at him and they kissed deeply as she hummed. "Smooth, Potter. Talk like that may make you lucky tonight."

"Lucky?" A curious voice called out as its owner, a blonde woman with pale, blue-gray eyes fell into their laps with a smile as she sprawled out on top of them. "Who's getting lucky? Can I help?"

Harry laughed and kissed Luna while Hermione scoffed and pulled out the book from underneath the younger witch. "Oh, honestly! You know very well you're helping," Hermione huffed, placing the book over top of the lounging witch and smiled down at her. "I've been a very bad witch today and will need to be properly punished, after all."

"Actually, we found more ritual books in the Vault and was just looking this one over," Harry said, using the adopted name for the hidden room they had found and stroking Luna's hair as she closed her eyes and listened.

"We?" Hermione asked with a raised eyebrow. "I specifically remember one of us fiddling with the enchanted rope and trying to climb it to the ceiling." Hermione eyed Harry as she felt Luna giggle underneath her arms. Both girls knew Harry had found that silly rope to be amusing. He had even conjured a wicker basket for it to rise out of so he could play the flute he had received many long years ago from Hagrid and then climb the bloody thing.

"Well, Hermione may have been the one to find it," he amended, "but still."

"Who would have thought your family had so many books on rituals and power-boosting magics?" Luna asked rhetorically. "They had always been hailed as some of the most powerful of the light families. I suppose now we know why."

"That, and the fact that the Vault was like a hidden lair where some rather powerful magics and magical items were stored," Hermione agreed. "I still can't believe your family was a secret bunch of cat burglars." Hermione shook her head while Harry shrugged.

"Hey," he said, looking down his nose and making his eyes twinkle. "That cache of books and goodies goes back a couple dozen generations. It's kept us from going bonkers for the past year. I'm willing to hold a little family pride in exchange for that."

Luna giggled as she pulled out a small box she had shrunk. "I even found the precursor to today's animated children's toys. There was a whole chest filled with dozens of races and even more of each one and all of them were literally begging to be played with." She looked Harry deep into his green eyes, ensnaring him with her wiles. Granted, she could ask from the other room and get the same answer, but it had to be done in a more fun way.

"Will you play with me? I can be the evil dictator bent on world domination and you can be the Hero."

Hermione snorted and flipped her page. "You just want an excuse to drag out that huge, golden throne Harry found down there so you can have a reason to sit on it."

"Every Dark Lady needs her pretties," Luna replied primly, causing Harry to laugh.

"Sure! I'll play with you, Luna. It'll be like that game of Risk we stole from Oakham after it fell. Wanna play Hermione? You can be the spy in both our ranks," he asked with a cheeky grin.

Rolling her eyes, Hermione sniffed and turned the page of her new book resolutely. "I'm very much entertained here, thank you. You may enjoy reading about only a few interesting topics, but I enjoy reading much more."


Harry stood and watched in no small amount of terror as creatures that he had never seen before demolished his entire army after a calm and ominous order of, "Release the Snorkacks," from Luna. As if apparating onto the expanded game board, the creatures that he learned had a penchant for remaining invisible appeared and began to decimate his army.

"Whu?" He spluttered as Luna calmly walked towards him with a 'liberated' scepter, that looked suspiciously like an original piece of the Crown Jewels when there had been a theft scare, that she had found in the Vault. "How did they use magic? I thought all we could do were give orders!"

"There's a wonderful tome in the Vault about Snorkacks that I've already read three times, actually," she said as she quietly conjured a large bed and then, as his last man fell, she magicked him onto it and conjured bindings on his wrists and ankles. "But enough talk. It's time for the fallen to learn their place." Finished speaking, she gagged him and began to unbutton her yellow shirt, well, it was his shirt, but pilfered for the occasion and worn for just this occasion. Hermione had learned six years ago that Harry enjoyed watching them undress. Hated it when they stopped, though. Odd that.

Harry silently thanked Luna for the ease in which she got bored. They had all gone through the large library within Potter Manor when they first arrived eight years ago and had focused highly on their knowledge in a vain hope that they could learn enough, fast enough, to help those who they could and destroy Voldemort, who had taken over the Ministry at that point. But it had been fruitless.

Well, almost fruitless. By the year and a half mark, they had all but run out of things to do aside from learn, and that got boring rather quickly, even to Hermione. All three had been spending so much time alone with each other that natural feelings progressed and mere months after arriving, they had all begun an odd sort of relationship filled with cuddles, friendly kisses and the occasional not-so-friendly kiss that was a little more heated after so many months of close confinement in a small tent during their Horcrux hunt. When they began to get bored, it had not been much longer for them to learn there were other fun pursuits men and women got to.

Of course, Luna's sudden question of, "why do we huddle at the table at night instead of having sweaty, dirty sex, anyway?" had probably got things going much more quickly, if he were to be honest with himself.

Just as Luna got half way down her buttons and began to stalk towards Harry with an impish grin, the fireplace in the foyer that they played in, so that the Risk board could be expanded to a proper size, grew and Luna spun while getting rid of the bed and gag while Harry wandlessly summoned himself a spare wand that worked best for him from the Vault. He did not need it, but it did help with most spell casting, so it was good to have. He still missed his Phoenix and Holly wand though.

Both stood and waited as Luna summoned a warning bell through the house, alerting Hermione that they may be under attack, this particular one letting her know where to go. When they had arrived at the house eight years ago, they learned that even the Ministry could not find them, much like Grimmauld Place, and had begun to do weekly drills to make sure they could handle an ambush as efficiently as possible. Even now, they did not let their guards down. It was actually Hermione who constantly yelled out "Constant Vigilance!"

Mere seconds after becoming ready, a large man in a red suit fell onto his butt in the middle of the fireplace and then literally bounced outwards to land on his feet. He was a little shorter than five feet and had a long, white beard and white trim on his suit with a large sack thrown over his right shoulder and wore a pair of glasses with black boots and gloves. The two muggle-raised children blinked in wide-eyed shock as Luna growled in the back of her throat.

"Santa!" Without a moments' hesitation, the blonde ran and launched herself at the man, much to his surprise, and landed squarely on the sack over his shoulder so that both legs and arms were firmly wrapped around it, glaring at the man who looked at her in confusion.

"Quick!" Luna yelled at the other two. "Get him while I've got his bag!"

"You're the brat that kept laying traps for me a few years ago!" Santa said as recognition flashed through his eyes.

"And you're the elf with the bag! Now gimmie!" Luna still had not released her grip on the sack and had fully attached both arms and legs around it by locking her hands and ankles so as not to be shaken off.

Santa sighed, rolled his eyes, and let go, letting the sack drop with an indignant squawk of protest from the blonde who was now underneath of it. Just as he was about to take a step away from her, a bludgeoning hex flashed by his face and hit the wall, obliterating a large section of it and going through at least one more wall from the sound of it. Oh yea! These guys were jumpy!

"Hold it right there," Harry growled as Hermione continued to scan the room and reached out with her magic to check the wards against any other intruders. Luna cackled madly as she began pulling numerous goodies out of the sack so thoughtfully purloined from the Jolly Man.

"It's okay," the ex-Ravenclaw said. "Santa's a fairy creature. That's how he could get past the wards. His alignment is also naturally good, so we don't have anything to worry about. And if we did, we couldn't stop him," she finished, falling in to her waist into the bag to reach for something else and muffling the rest of her words.

While neither of her lovers were willing to trust the new person who had just waltzed right in, they did trust Luna, so they lowered their wands, even if they did not put them away. "So, what are you doing here?" Hermione finally asked.

"I'm on a mission from my Queen, Lilith," he responded, his baritone voice filling them with happiness and good spirits while his actual words caused Luna to look up in shock, blue tensile strung around her ears. "If you'd like to listen, she has a proposal for you that would help everyone out and fix a lot of problems."

Neither of them knowing nearly as much about fantastical creatures and the like as Luna did, though Hermione recognized the name vaguely, she and Harry looked to Luna who shrugged. "Lilith is the Queen of all fairies. She's known by many names, but frequents parts of Ireland and enjoys the name out of fondness for the people. She's directly tied to all other fairies as their Queen Mother and is, quite easily, one of the most powerful beings on the planet."

Harry turned to Santa and asked, "are you alone?"

Santa nodded. "In more ways than one," he said quietly, confusing the others. "Perhaps we could speak in a more comfortable location? I've had to travel long and hard to make it here without being caught, followed or tracked."

"Oh!" Hermione said in surprise. It had been so long for them to have seen anyone but each other that neither three of them had remembered to entertain guests. "I'm so sorry! Right this way! Dobby!"

Luna followed the others, making sure to keep his sack out of reach of Santa and glaring at him any time he so much as looked at it while Hermione requested drinks from Dobby; tea for them, milk for Santa, and cookies all around. When they reached the sitting room, they all sat down, though Luna stayed in the floor to look through the spoils of war. She only called them that because there was no way in hell he was getting that bag from her without one now!

"You've gotten worse," Santa said to Luna, but smiling all the same. Being around her right now filled him with more good cheer than he had felt in nearly a decade.

"I'm sorry? How do the two of you know each other?" Harry asked a breath away from Hermione.

"Oh, I never told you?" Luna said, honestly surprised. "He visited me as a child and I knocked out one of his elves and stowed away on the sleigh."

"You nearly took over the North Pole, too!" Santa said, frustrated as he recalled the majority of the visit. His own elves had laid out traps for him! He had been forced to hide out in the reindeer stalls with Blitzen, and that little bugger farted like nobody's business!

Luna waved him off airily. "Only a little," she mumbled before diving back into the bag.

"What can we help you with?" Hermione asked, wanting to get to the heart of the matter.

Santa sighed and tilted his head back, deciding on where best to begin. "This war is over, no matter how we want to look at it. Voldemort has been capturing fairies these past couple of years and experimenting on us, trying to find the exact secret to our longevity. He and his cohorts have decimated over eighty percent of my kind while doing similar things to other magical races."

"That's horrible! What on earth could he want that for? He's got horcruxes!" Hermione asked, outraged.

"It's as much our magic as our longevity, I think," Santa responded. "Regardless, we are being rounded up and he's doing the same to all magical beings, hoping to find a way to mix them all together for their strengths while removing their weaknesses. We think he is hoping to make that new body he plans to inhabit truly immortal."

"I'm sorry, but what has this got to do with us?" Harry asked, looking at Hermione and then Luna, who had finally found something highly reflective and with lots of baubles to play with while she sat next to him and got into the conversation herself.

"Tell me. My stories about going around the world and gifting children with toys are true. What would that take to be able to accomplish?" Santa asked.

"Well, in theory, you'd need to move at incredible speeds or, since we know you don't hit every child's home, you don't have nearly as many as is shown in stories," Hermione said, looking thoughtful.

"Or, you'd need to move through time, rather than within it," Luna said, trying to balance her new toy on her nose.

"Oh! That's right!" Hermione gushed. "There's a book in the Vault written by a man who called himself Perfect Lionheart! In it, one of his characters actually stated, 'time has virtually no meaning around the fae. It can flow backwards or forwards, fast or slow or even sideways sometimes'." She paused only a moment to scrunch up her nose. "How can time move sideways?"

Harry chuckled as Santa nodded and continued his story. "That's right. I am my Queen's most powerful fae in matters where Time is concerned. Moving sideways through time is liking having two time streams in one, where something is duplicated or where I am one being, but in several places at once at that same time, even though it looks like there are many of me. I'm here to do something very similar to that. What my Queen proposes is that I send you back as far as I can to allow you to right wrongs and fix this story from ever happening."

"Are you absolutely mad!" Hermione shrieked, her hair standing on end and her eyes wide with her skin having paled drastically. If Harry did not love her, he would have shrieked and ran. "Messing with the flow of time could cause a paradox or the utter destruction of the Space-Time Continuum! That was drilled into me constantly in my third year when I got a time-turner!"

"Sideways, Hermione," Luna softly chastised with a finger in the air and a knowing smirk. "The fae travel through time constantly, even sometimes sending people back and forcing them to live new lives in what should be their pasts. They are exempt from such rules. It is one of their ... unique properties."

"The little hooligan is right," Santa said while nodding. "My Queen gets her power from her children, which are all of the fairy creatures. The more there are, the more powerful she is. However, all of the others get their power from the positive emotions and good will that are broadcast by humans and drifts around the world, eventually getting soaked up by us children fairy. We are creatures of beauty and pleasure. That's why I even bother with presents at Christmas time. That is when some of the strongest, positive feelings come from and some of the darkest as well. That boost in spirit gives us a massive surge in our own sustenance."

"I didn't know that," Harry said. "I just always assumed you eat things like others do. Veggies, fruits, maybe some flowers or what not for the smaller ones."

"We do eat other things, but they do not sustain us alone. When muggles began to expand and destroy our homes and with the murder of our brethren by Voldemort and other wizards, we have been forced to find ways to increase those positive feelings. With the advent of technology, less people believe and there is less and less to go around."

Hermione winced as Santa sighed, having noticed how raggy and worn he looked. "It can't be very ... appetizing ... for you with this war and the many that Voldemort has killed. Especially after he authorized The Purge and they began killing muggles as they found them. I mean, the muggle population is nearly extinct now, to say nothing of the lines of magical people that have been hunted down for not being pureblooded or following Voldemort."

Santa nodded sadly. "Even worse, the more of us die, the weaker the rest become, which means the weaker our Queen is. She creates new fae directly proportional to her levels. She can't make but a few a week right now, and we're being exterminated much faster."

"So, what does this have to do with us? You said you wanted to send us back?" Harry said again, noticing Hermione square her shoulders to become more highly informed and ask questions.

"The three of you, yes. You've learned so much and have some kind of tie to fate with Voldemort that my Queen is allowing me to do this. She will pull the power from all of her remaining children and gather it unto herself, and then feed it to me, along with all of hers. I will live only moments longer after she sacrifices her life for power, but it will be far more than enough to send you back once I get it all."

"She's going to kill herself?" Luna asked, looking frightened beyond anything Harry could ever remember. And that was after having found her underneath one of the Snatchers at her home who were planning on using her for their amusements while her father watched. Harry had officially killed intentionally for the first time that day. He was surprised he did not regret it, even then.

"I thought the Fairy Queen was supposed to live in all times at once! If she dies here, what will happen to her there?" Hermione asked, remembering that little bit of lore from somewhere she honestly could not remember.

"She will be alive when you return," Santa assured the bushy-haired one. "While she is alive in all times and fully cognizant of them at once, this is just one of the many time streams she is aware of. She will know this path leads to her death. But because this is after then," he said, referencing the present and the past as best he could for those who didn't look at time the same way he did, "she will be aware, but alive. This will stop any of this from happening, assuming you don't fail, of course."

"What will happen to this reality?" Luna asked.

Santa shrugged his shoulders and frowned. "I have no idea. You'll be in the same time line, but you will be earlier than the current present. So, once you change things, this time line should fade away and become the new one. Or just continue on. My Queen cannot see beyond a little bit from now, so she dies one way or another. But, it will be the exact same in every way to the past you knew, the people will be the same, circumstances and the like. But, it is like you would have wakened from a very long, very horrifying dream that you remember in every horrid detail."

"Can items go back with us?" Hermione asked. "Will we have our same magic levels or the benefits of the rituals we've performed on ourselves? What about if we wanted to take any of the expensive things from now to help pay our way in the past?"

Santa shook his head. "There are multiple ways of sending you back. The one that requires the least amount of power, allowing you to go back further, will be sending back only your minds and nothing physical or different than need be. You can perform those rituals again and gather all of the things you have now again. You know what you may do."

The three looked at each other helplessly for a moment, wondering if this was really too good to be true.

On one hand, they could say no. They could go on about their lives, allowing the remaining millions to die and guarantee that the war will end in Voldemort's favor. They will be tucked safely away, or as safely as possible, in their home and continue to love each other, play with the toys they found and learn things. Unless Voldemort actually created a fae body to inhabit, since they could apparently find them.

On the other hand, they could go back in time, if this was to be believed, giving billions a new chance at life. They could save Hermione's parents, Luna's father, the Order and countless others and all of the things in the home would be there if they arrived. The only threat was of them dying now, rather than in a century and a half or so.

"I am sorry to tell you this, but I have almost no time left. We must make our decision quickly. More of my kind are dying by the minute, which keeps me from sending you back further each time. As it is, I don't even know how far you will go. I've never sent a non-fairy back before and certainly never three of them at once."

Silent communication flashed through their heads with looks and touches and they all agreed. "We'll do it," they said as one.

"Alright. Then remain there," he said, closing his eyes and communicating with his Queen through a mental link all fae shared. That odd blonde still had a hold of his sack, too.

Almost immediately, fairy around the world, what was left of them, dropped from where they were and died in the middle of experimentations as their power was pulled from them and convalesced at a single point in Ireland, only to get sent to Santa who began to glow a bright white. Power hummed in the air and light began to shoot out of his eyes and mouth as it sought a way free of its prison.

The trio of humans hugged each other, silently saying final I-love-you's in their heads as they felt themselves pulse once and then there was a purity of nothingness. No sound, no light, no touch and no thought. Each was aware, but not consciously, as they drifted in nonexistence and shadow until a rush of reality came and enveloped them.


Harry clutched at feathers in his hand as Hermione screeched behind him in terror, raising a few octaves in pitch as his Hermione came back and realized they were in the air and heading downwards. He had only a moment to catch himself as they landed in the darkness, quickly noticing that they were at Hogwarts some time and ... riding a hippogriff?

"Get me off of this bloody thing!" Hermione screeched and leapt away from Harry and the foul-smelling man that had been behind her.

Harry dismounted Buckbeak and quickly realized what this was. With wide eyes, he turned to the fugitive on the back of the hippogriff who slipped and fell on his ass with a smile. "Hermione! It worked!" He yelled, running to the girl who finally realized what was going on as Harry rushed at her and wrapped her in a huge hug and kissed her soundly on the lips, swinging the two around in circles much to Sirius Black's amusement.

"Harry!" She squealed happily as he set her down.

"Thank you, you two! I was sure I was a goner that time!" Sirius said, smiling warmly at the two and coming up to them slowly. He had only just met them in person a few hours ago, really, and did not want them to get jittery around him now.

Harry, however, had memories of the man that extended beyond that point in time and rushed up to grab the man in another hug, careful not to kiss him. The man stank something awful! "Padfoot! God I missed you!"

Still smiling, but confusedly so, Sirius hugged Harry back for several seconds before Harry pulled away quickly and adopted a serious expression. Suddenly realizing things had to change quickly. "Sirius, I need some help from you. I know you're going to hate going there, and I don't blame you, but I need you to go to your family's home at Grimmauld and find a locket with a shiny, ornate 'S' engraved on it and then wait for me there until I come to get you. Don't touch it with you hands and don't try to open it and for the love of Merlin, don't put it on! Your house elf will try to stop you, most likely, as well, so you need to take him out of action."

Sirius looked confusedly between Harry and Hermione, wondering what the hell his Godson was talking about. "What? I don't understand. Harry, I don't like that place. I'd rather-"

"No buts, Sirius. I need this. Make sure you tell your house elf there to not leave the building without your permission, and be very, very specific about not letting him talk to anyone while away. Do you understand me? Please, Sirius," Harry finished, looking as pleading as he could.

Sirius was confused as all hell, but willing to help. The boy had just saved his life, along with what appeared to be his girlfriend. He could offer no less. Finally, he nodded his assent. "Alright, Harry. Whatever you need."

Harry nodded and then barked out, "Dobby!" Instantly, a tiny house elf was by Harry's side and then grasped by the shoulder by the boy. "Dobby, this is Sirius Black. He's my godfather and innocent of all charges. Can you help him get to his family home unseen by muggles or wizards and make sure to help with anything he needs? I'll be coming in a few days to hire you into my family of myself, Hermione and Luna, who will be your mistresses, their families and Sirius. Is that okay?"

Dobby listened and received it all with gradually widening eyes. His one dream ... come true ... "Dobby would bare Master Harry's love child to be a part of his family," Dobby said in worshipful tones, making Hermione snort as she tried to hold in her amusement. He had said the same thing the last time around, too!

Sirius had no such restraints. "BWA HA HA!" The man was rolling on the ground and only the fear of straggling dementors kept him from actually yelling the words.

Harry sighed and shook his head negatively. "Er, that won't be necessary Dobby," he said sheepishly.

Dobby nodded frantically and hurried the laughing convict onto the hippogriff, setting them off and to get the first Horcrux to be destroyed that they could not get themselves. After watching them fly away, Hermione heard the first chime from the bell tower and practically had a heart attack. They were going to be late!

The duo rushed to the hospital wing, silently amazed they could make the run of such a large distance so quickly and entered just as their 'past' selves disappeared. The irony of reaching that very point in time was not lost on them.

"How did you two get all the way over there, when you were just over here," Ronald Weasley said, looking like he thought he may have taken a blow to the head. They were close to giving him one themselves. He would need to be given one chance to not become what he was in their time line, or he would need to be eliminated.

"Do you know what he's talking about, Hermione?" Harry asked with a smirk as Hermione smiled back.

"Not a clue, Harry." Chuckling, the two closed the door with half-hearted comments to Ron, telling him to take it easy and recuperate. They were almost down the stairs when Dumbledore found them.

"Ah, lovely night for a stroll, isn't it?" Dumbledore asked with eyes twinkling away like crazy. The two children smirked and agreed, managing to not have to say anything else as the Headmaster walked into the Infirmary.


Luna looked around herself and noticed she was in the shower and looked around confusedly. Okay. So she was back. But to when?

Looking down, she noticed her breasts were only little more than mounds on her chest, so it was before her third year, since she had grown two full cup sizes in the summer before her third year alone. And she had nothing there to speak of for her entire first year. Looking down further, she saw her pubic hair was fully untrimmed, but still not overly thick, so that meant it was not the beginning of her second year, which was the year before she had developed a bit faster and almost fully blossomed into womanhood and had begun to grow it. Or at least the growth spurt that year had certainly made her think she had. Either that or Nargles were tricking her again. They were odd like that.

So, it was some time during her second year and in the last half. Not seeing anything else she could use, she checked to make sure she was clean and then got out, quickly using a drying charm on herself. She absolutely loathed the things as they made her feel overly dry, but was willing to use it for the emergency. Seeing there was no one around, as she learned long, long ago not to bathe around her house mates, and that it was well past night time as she entered her dorm room after donning her night robe, she knew it was after her first year. She had not been able to get away with bathing alone until she was in her second year. So that had confirmed her earlier suspicions.

Running the puzzle through her head, she found her trunk and opened it, looking at the title of her course book, only one as the others had all been stolen, and then finally at a calendar to get the date.

"Oh! Goody!" She clapped her hands and then left her dorm room with a smile before she looked at her empty hands and cursed in her own unique way. "Snorkacks! He didn't send me back with his sack!"

Growling in the back of her throat and transfiguring her night robe into her usual sleeping attire from that particular period of time, she continued to stomp out of the Ravenclaw tower in her footy pajamas, not even bothering to latch the back flap closed. As she told her loves multiple times, it simply breathed better this way.

And Harry absolutely loved it.

Still, she marched up to the Hospital wing with a disillusionment charm over herself, partly so she could not be seen by Filch and partly because only Harry was allowed to see that wonderful, flapless back. As she turned a corner, she bumped into the very two she was looking for. Only they could not see her.

"Oomph!" Hermione grunted as she fell on her backside, looking suspiciously at the air in front of her. "Luna, I presume?"

A gentle, disembodied and ethereal voice floated from nowhere ahead of them. "You may assume, Hermione."

Harry and Hermione grinned as Luna materialized before them, smiling warmly and all three spoke as one, "It's good to see you, Love." Unable to help it as delirious happiness bubbled up within all of them, they began to laugh and hold onto one another as it really only just kicked in that they were, indeed, back and that it had not been some weird joke or trick or even nightmare.

It was not long before those laughs became crying and Harry looked around, realizing they were in the middle of a hallway. "Let's get to the Room for a bit," he suggested, getting nods from his companions.


Harry held the door open for the two girls as they entered the Room of Requirement and then shut it softly behind them, entering into a room identical to the sitting room that they had all enjoyed at Potter Manor. It was an expansive room, but everything looked and felt warm, welcoming and comfortable with a warm fire burning in the fireplace and a few small bookshelves dotted about for their favorites and whatever they were reading at the time.

"I almost can't believe Hogwarts was ever this calm and peaceful," Hermione said with a sniffle as she and Luna sat down on the couch in front of the fire, just far enough apart for Harry to wedge himself between them and pull both girls under his arms and hugged them tightly.

"It's such a different place without being under Voldemort's control," Luna agreed, burrowing under Harry's arm further.

"I guess the most important thing is to decide how we're going to go about this," Harry said after a comfortable silence enveloped the recently-become-children. "Do we go in at full assault or do we try and play it as close to the original as we can or what? Santa said things could be changed without problems. There's a phrase I never thought I'd say..."

As Harry yawned tiredly, he felt the two girls nod underneath of him. "No matter what, I think we need to go ahead and try to get your parents out of the way. Maybe even give them full disclosure. They can stay at Potter Manor. I'm sure as hell marrying you two before it gets too late this time around, so it's going to be your home now as well," he said firmly, getting giggles and thankful kisses on his cheeks for his concerns.

"I know Daddy will be willing; he would do pretty much anything I asked of him," Luna said as she stared into the fires, finishing in a whisper. "I'll be happy to see him again."

Hermione shuddered under Harry's arm and cried softly. "I would appreciate that, Harry. Thank you. I have to stop them from having the same end again."

Harry squeezed her shoulders comfortingly, knowing Hermione needed it. Voldemort had found her parents in thanks to Ron having betrayed them and telling the Dark Lord where Hermione's parents had been hiding out and what she had done to their memories.

The Death Eaters that had found them tortured them for hours, raping her mother while her father was forced to watch and then torturing him while she watched before eventually killing them both. And then, to top it all off, they had sent the memory strand to Hermione while they were on the Horcrux Hunt and without a Pensieve, so the only way to view it had been to absorb the memory into her own mind.

Ron had actually been the one to send it; his owl, his handwriting and his own note, so Hermione had trusted in it and then was subjected to the memory of the man who gave the memory strand up, thereby forcing the girl to suddenly become aware of how it felt to rape, torture and kill her own mother. A mother who did not even remember their daughter and was only killed as a message to Hermione.

Ron had looked into a mirror and into his own eyes, speaking to the brunette he knew would accept the memory strand just as the note had suggested and told them about his double crossing them; "This happened because you didn't come with me, Hermione. I wound up not having you, so I had the woman you would become. Tell Harry I said 'hi', and when I find you, you'll be mine. The Dark Lord promised you to me in exchange for Harry. You cannot run from us forever. We'll find you."

Hermione had been inconsolable for a week, stalling the hunt. She had nearly lost herself while in a severe psychotic breakdown, but Harry had managed to get through to her and finally asked her about removing the memory strand.

Ron had taken a long time to die after Hermione had found him. Harry felt no remorse as he watched his best female friend, who had been his lover for only a month at that point, slowly and methodically, as with all pursuits, kill his oldest friend in the wizarding world, Hagrid excepted.

"What do we tell them if they don't want to hide?" Harry asked, regretting having never truly met the parents of the two girls. While it had been nearly a decade since they had known them, the girls still knew them far better than he could.

"My parents will be the hardest, I think," Hermione said. "But, I think we should offer full disclosure. To them, Luna's dad and Sirius at least. We'll need his help, most likely, and my parents have been willing to go outside of their comfort zone for me since they found out I was a witch. This may be more than they can handle right away, but I think it would be for the best."

She continued on, using the planning as a distraction from her earlier thoughts and memories. "We should also see about getting you emancipated so Dumbledore can't do his thing again."

"He's already blocked those routes, if I remember correctly. I can't get emancipated until I'm fifteen, so I've another year and a half yet," Harry replied with a sigh.

"Not if you get married," Luna said, grinning at the other two. "It has always been tradition that a boy would be considered an adult when he married and took up control over his household. It's been that way since before the Middle Ages as girls were expected to marry around twelve to fourteen. While it was more about the low life expectancy, it has never been repealed as many found it useful." Luna just didn't say it was from perverted old men who wanted their young bodies.

"That's still allowed?" Hermione asked incredulously. By the time they had made it to Potter Manor, anything based on law was ignored as Voldemort was in control over the government at that point, so it was pointless. And even Hermione freely admitted that books regarding the laws of the wizarding world were beyond boring. She had tried. It was disgusting to see what kind of bigotry was in the books, much of it recent and before Voldemort added the truly heinous laws in. Thankfully, Luna grew up in the culture where that information was considered 'basic' knowledge.

"Yes. I would need Daddy's permission, and you your parents'," she said, nodding to Hermione, "but once he is married to at least one of us, he will be fully emancipated and even the purebloods will not fight it as it goes against very long-standing traditions. They constantly use that little loophole to allow their sons to marry into another family and take control at a younger age."

"What about me?" Harry asked.

"You would need your guardians' approval. But if you tell them that it will get you away from them, they are sure to sign the documentation," Luna said with a shrug.

All three grinned and Harry kissed both girls deeply before the events of going back in time and then remembering some of the more horrid events of their lives caught up to them and the three of them passed out on the couch together, which turned into a bed by the Room's intent.


The next day, relatively early in the morning, the Room of Requirement acted again of its own accord and woke the sleeping trio early, knowing they had much to get done. Tinkling bells made their appearance and all three woke up, looking about themselves curiously until everything came back and happy grins formed on their faces.

Giggling like mad, all three used the Room's abilities and created a shower to clean each other off, memorizing their newer, 'old' bodies and practicing with their smaller forms, each expecting longer reaches and greater strength than they now had, both physically and magically.

"I can't believe my reserves were ever this low," Harry said with a hint of wonder as they dressed in their previous outfits, magically cleaned of course.

"Well, it stands to reason. We did some of the power-boosting rituals from your home and they naturally grew on their own as we aged. I'm more worried about bad memories bleeding over and causing trouble," Hermione replied, not having to say she was talking about Ron.

"Didn't you find a strong power-enhancing ritual only hours before we came back?" Luna asked, hoping to change the subject to keep Hermione from thinking murderous thoughts. It worked.

Hermione stopped just before they reached the door and turned to Luna with shock written across her face and promptly launched herself at the girl, kissing her firmly and then pulling back with a silly grin on her face. "Luna! You're absolutely brilliant!"

"Yes, I know," the blonde replied with a smile.

"Not to be the naysayer, but wasn't that a sex-based ritual for virgins? Aren't we a little young for that? And three of us instead of two?" Harry asked.

Both girls giggled and kissed Harry on the cheeks simultaneously before opening the door and walking into the hall to head down for breakfast. "Harry, if we get married, then we will have a wedding night where we consummate the marriage. And only the woman had to be a virgin in all technicality, since it is the blood sacrifice of losing our hymen that is the final component of the ritual. Since the blood will be on both of us, we both gain the benefits. You doubly so, now that I think about it."

"Oh," Harry said, blinking rapidly.

Hermione smirked smugly. "Now aren't you glad I like to read more than you?"

Harry spoke in parsletongue and then grinned wickedly as the girls look at him curiously. "Not as happy as the two of you will be," he said, making them both blush profusely.

In an odd sort of synchronization, the two girls spoke as one, "bloody puberty."


"What's Loony doing here?" Ron asked grumpily as he sat heavily at the table for breakfast. The trio had brought Luna to the Gryffindor table so they could talk and eat together, seeing no reason to split up now and had forgotten Madam Pomfrey had released him the next morning because she had not wanted to keep hearing his complaints about being hungry even though he had eaten his breakfast. And hers.

"Her name is 'Luna', Ronald!" Hermione hissed furiously, both sticking up for her soon-to-be co-wife and friend and remembering very horrific events that, officially, hadn't even happened yet.

Ron jerked as if she had slapped him and then hexed him with everything she knew for several seconds, opening and closing his mouth wordlessly as he recognized her venomous glare and angry tone of voice. "Geez! Sorry Hermione!"

"Don't apologize to me, apologize to Luna for being such a bastard," she ordered, not letting up on her glare. Seeing she was actually serious about it, Ron mumbled an apology and quickly went to eating, not looking up from his plate.

"It's okay," Luna said, setting her fork down. "I have an owl to send off anyway. I've got a few papers to request from Gringotts and Father." She gave a pointed look to Harry who recognized her intentions and then left, getting fond farewells from Harry and Hermione. Ron's ears turned pink, but he didn't bother even looking up from his plate.

"Well, we leave tomorrow. Are you two packed, or nearly so?" Hermione asked, doing her best to sound normal even though she was ready to kill Ron from across the table.

"Actually, I am going to pack up later tonight," Harry said. "I'm going to ask Moony a couple of questions about Sirius and my parents that I'd like to find out."

"I'll pack tomorrow," Ron grumbled, refusing to look at Hermione. The blasted girl was nutters!

Hermione's lip curled in a silent snarl as he spoke, but she refrained from moving and then nodded. "I'll be doing some work in the library, I think. Maybe copying a few things for reading over the summer," she said. Harry knew she was going to copy some of the spell books from the Restricted Section that they had, as far as they knew, not been able to get while on the run or already at Potter Manor.


"Ah, Harry! It's good to see you," Remus Lupin said as he packed away all of his belongings with a small air of sadness and misery. Being a werewolf, he was almost constantly looking for work. His tenure as a Hogwarts professor had actually been the only steady job he had held in probably a decade.

"Your secret got out then, I'm assuming?" Harry asked, knowing it was true.

"Yes," Lupin answered, giving a self-depreciating smile. "It would seem someone let slip the nature of my condition."

"I'm sure I know a few pranksters who can make Snape's life hell for him next year," Harry offered with a warm smile, getting one in return. "But I'm here for a few reasons. One, I actually wanted to offer you a job for the summer, at least, and probably longer. Second, I've got some questions about my family I was hoping you and Paddy can answer after you accept the third and final request, which is to go to Potter Manor and wait for me to bring Sirius there so we, and a few others, can have a very important talk."

Remus blinked for a moment before shaking his head, not even realizing Harry wasn't supposed to know about the residence as of yet. "I'm sorry, Harry, but I can't access the property. I've never been there. Your dad never officially took up the title of Lord Potter and never took me there. Your father and grandparents never lived there because it was too large for just them."

Harry nodded and grabbed a loose parchment from Lupin's desk, writing 'Potter Manor' on it and tapping it with his wand. "Portus," he encanted, making the paper glow a soft blue for a fraction of a second and then fading. "This is a multi-use portkey that will take you into the main foyer. Make sure you take enough food for a couple of days or use this somewhere you can use it to go back. It will memorize the original location and go back and forth."

Remus spluttered for a moment, looking at the parchment being held out to him in confusion. "How did you learn to make this, Harry? That's very advanced and I don't even know of a version that memorizes the original location. You have to put in both locations. It's very advanced magic, besides!"

"That'll be explained later. Are you game or not?" Harry asked with a little more annoyance showing than he would have originally. Having spent so much time with only Hermione, Luna, Dobby and Winky, he had fallen out of the habit of interacting well with others. He hadn't exactly been too suave to begin with, but that had been due to isolation as much as anything. He had still met and interacted with people. The past near decade had been with Hermione and Luna and, anyone else they met just about, were enemies.

"Yes, Harry. I'll be there," Lupin said quietly, taking the parchment. The inner wolf within him had backed down when Harry became obviously annoyed, which was not something that happened often. The only time it happened was when another werewolf defeated him in a fight and proved its dominance, or whoever was before him was much more powerful. It had happened only one other time, and that was when Harry had learned the Patronus and nearly created a fully corporeal one.

"Excellent! And, the conversation is a doozy, so you may want to pack a few bottles of firewhiskey. I'm sure Sirius will need one, you'll probably need one and, well, everyone, really," Harry said, frowning as he realized how 'out there' the conversation was going to become.


"I don't bloody care," Hermione growled out, dragging Harry behind her. "You deflowered me once and if you want any chance of doing it again, you're damn well going to make sure you meet my parents properly first!"

Behind them, Luna giggled. "Should I be worried, oh fiancé of mine?"

"Only for my health," Harry muttered darkly as Hermione's parents came into view through the crowd. Immediately, Hermione took off like a rocket and latched onto both of them in a fierce hug. A decade of knowing her parents to be dead and then having them alive, hale and healthy took away years of pain.

Hermione's parents laughed and hugged their daughter, not knowing where the affection came from, but willing to take it. After hugging her back, they looked at the two that stood a respectful distance back and watched with smiles on their faces. "Are you going to introduce us to your friends, honey?" Her mother asked.

Hermione stepped back with suspiciously shiny eyes and nodded, wiping at her eyes and indicating each in turn. "Mum, Dad, this is Harry Potter and Luna Lovegood. They're my best friends."

The two shook the elder Granger's hands and said their hello's while Hermione looked up to her parents, silently wondering if she had really been that short compared to them before. "Mum, Dad, we've got some things to talk about. They're very, very important. Would you mind if we got Luna's dad, let Harry get a chance to get his relatives to sign something and then go to his place?"

Instantly, Hermione's parents' instincts kicked in and their faces grew worried. "Is everything okay?" Her mother asked as her father looked suspiciously at Harry, details of a father's worst nightmare haunting the forefront of his mind and wondering exactly what kinds of talks his wife and daughter had held together the past few summers. It certainly didn't help matters that all of Hermione's letters were about the boy and that they had to get another girl's father involved as well. Two girls, one boy. Dan was sure he was going to commit murder before the day was out.

"Yes, of course," Hermione said with a small laugh, fresh giddiness at her parents' voices coming back to her as music to hear ears. She could almost swear she felt their concern and that alone made her want to cry in relief. "But it's still very important and we need to have this conversation soon."

Dan couldn't help himself. His mind was already filled with thoughts of baby booties and dirty diapers and the sure knowledge that whatever was wrong, the boy was at the center of it and the words were already leaving his traitorous mouth before he could stop them. "Soon as in nine months soon or something else?"



"LUNA!" All of the Grangers and Harry looked curiously at the smiling Luna who had begun to feel left out and decided to join the fun. "What? I wanted to play too."

Hermione and Harry chuckled, used to the girl's antics by now, though that one still caught them off guard, and Hermione turned back to her parents wearing an amused, but reproachful scowl. "No, Daddy. It's nothing like that."

"Well, we've taken the next three days off so we could spend some time together, so I think we have the time."

As Hermione's mother finished speaking, Hermione turned to Harry. "Would you like us to come with you to Grimmauld?" She asked.

"May as well. We can all go from there to Potter Manor. Luna, why don't you find your dad and introduce everyone? I'm going to get signed off and find you guys. Be right back." With that, Harry took off to where he knew the Dursleys would be waiting while Luna went off to find her father, having been looking at her memories of the day several times the past two days thanks to her occlumency lessons and Hermione was left to ease her parents' fears, most especially her father's.

Harry took a deep breath and walked up to Vernon and Petunia, thanking the Fates that Dudley wasn't going to be there that day, and held up a hand, stopping the man before he could even speak and then started explaining before the man got downright angry. "Hello Uncle Vernon. I wanted to let you know about this," he said, holding up the parchment and a transfigured pen that he would be familiar with, "and let you know that it's a form that agrees to allow me to get married. If you sign it, I will be officially engaged and out of your hair forever. If you don't, then we're stuck together for another four years."

Vernon looked at the boy and narrowed his eyes, confused, but internally dancing over the prospect of getting rid of the freak for good. "Why would anyone wanna marry you, boy?"

Harry barely resisted the urge to roll his eyes. He had expected a little resistance, but that was a nicer tone than expected. "My world is very backwards compared to yours. This is just so I can be legally considered an adult, which means you won't have anything to do with me after it's signed. Once I'm married, I'll belong to another family."

Vernon snatched the paper and made a grunt as he read it quickly, skimming most of the words and allowing Harry to continue. "I know you want me out of your house and life, and I'm giving you that option now."

Taking the proffered pen, Vernon motioned for Harry to spin around and then put the paper on Harry's back and signed with a happy smile on his face, giving Petunia the pen to sign with. She hesitated only a moment, but decided arguing wasn't worth the effort since Vernon was obviously only too thrilled to be rid of the kid. He was supposed to be there for their protection as much as his, but no one had come for them yet, so it must have been fine after twelve years, right?

"This is fully legit then?" Vernon asked gruffly, not wanting this to come back to bite him in the ass later. "I don't have to see you any more?"

Harry immediately took the paper before anything could happen to it and nodded. "Yes. You may get one last visitor, but that should be it, two at most." He didn't feel inclined to tell them the second was most likely to be someone to kill them slowly and painfully. He would let them find out later. They had literally been treated like royalty for a week when Voldemort found them. Their every wish fulfilled and their every desire granted. After a week of making them happier than they could possibly have imagined, Voldemort had pulled the proverbial rug out from under them and then tortured them for a month for sport, having fed them potions and a good many spells to make sure they would survive it all under the guise of the first week.

Vernon clapped Harry on the shoulder like a man parting ways with a friend, spooking the bespectacled boy more than a little. "It was a pain in the ass knowing you, kid. Now get the hell out of my sight," he ordered, making Harry's face go slack.

'I'll miss you too, Uncle. Oh! No! Don't worry about me, I'll be fine! Why yes, I DO love the girls I'm going to marry! No, it isn't because I've gotten her pregnant. Bastard. What the hell is wrong with this guy?' Harry thought, even as he responded. "Later, Uncle Vernon, Aunt Petunia." Spinning on his heel, he walked over to the baffled-looking Grangers who were talking to the animated form of Xenophilius Lovegood and Luna, who was stuck like a leech to the man's side.

"Get everything you needed, Harry?" Luna asked.

"Yup. All done."

"To the car!" Hermione called out, making her parents blink. There were six of them!


Harry allowed Hermione to get off of his lap and stepped out of the car after her once they pulled into Number Twelve, Grimmauld Place. Liberal use of shrinking charms, courtesy of Xenophilius, had allowed them to sit comfortably in the car, much to the Grangers' shock and amusement, and Luna sat in her father's lap while Hermione took Harry's. Her father was not amused, but was put in his place by Emma. Rule number one, which Harry had learned very early in; do as you're told. Dan Granger seemed to know the rule too.

Harry was about to knock on the door when Dobby opened it with an excited grin and bounce. "Welcome Master Harry! Come in! You can be bringing the Mistresses in, too! And your friends!"

Harry smiled and thanked his little friend, being engulfed in a hug from the side faster than he would have thought from a washed, shaved and dressed Sirius Black. "Hello Sirius," Harry grunted out with the little air he had in him. He also noticed the house looked better than it had even in the past while the Order of the Phoenix had been using it.

"Hello Pup!" The older man said happily as the rest of the group piled into the house. "Eh?"

Harry stepped back and began working from his side and then closest to the door. "Sirius, this is Hermione Granger, Daniel Granger, Emma Granger, Xenophilius Lovegood and Luna Lovegood. They're going to be going with us to Potter Manor in a few minutes to have a discussion with Remus. Everyone, this is Sirius Black. Did you find that locket I asked you about?"

Confused as all hell, Sirius nodded as Dobby brought in a large ball of leather and handed it to Harry. "Master Harry, that be having the bad locket inside. It be making Kreacher do bad things, so Dobby wrap it and seal it."

"Thank you, Dobby," Harry said, pocketing the locket and pulling out a large roll of parchment that he unraveled and held out, Hermione and Luna grabbing a hold of it immediately. "If you could all touch this, it will take us to Potter Manor. It's a method of magical transportation known as a Portkey," he explained to the Grangers.

Hermione could see her parents' apprehension, so she spoke up to help them. "It is a little uncomfortable, but it's also the only way to get there right now. It's also the safest place. You'll feel a pulling sensation at your bellybutton, and then we'll be there. Just hold on, alright?"

Once everyone had a hold of it, including Dobby, Harry tapped it with his wand and activated it, sending them all to Potter Manor.

The group landed in a heap in the main foyer, Dan and Emma checking their stomachs to make sure they were still there. "That was certainly unpleasant," Emma said, getting up slowly and looking around the room, seeing an expansive floor made of what appeared to be marble with many wooden and metal accents, pictures of people in rather outdated fashions and ... those pictures were looking at her. "Hermione? Why are the pictures pointing at us and talking?"

Hermione smiled cheekily and pointed the pictures off, telling her mother their names and a brief history about them from memory. They had been nearly invaluable conversationalists when the group had been practically stuck on house arrest for fear of getting caught.

"Harry?" Remus asked from the doorway leading the the center of the house as he saw the large group of people the boy had brought with him.

"Hey Remus. How's it going?"

"Good," the werewolf said confusedly.

Harry ignored the tone of his voice, knowing he would be answering most of his questions soon enough. "Alright everyone. Let's head to the lounge and we'll explain everything that's going on."

Without being prompted, Hermione took the lead and everyone followed her through a few different hallways and into the original sitting room the time-traveling trio had called from the Room of Requirement their first night back. The seats were already in position to seat several more than had come with them that day and so everyone sat while Dobby went off to make refreshments and snacks for everyone, knowing the stasis charms on the pantry and chill chest would have kept things in proper order.

Harry remained standing in front of the group, however. Neither girl wanted to sit away from her parents and, having followed Harry in the war for nearly twenty years in total, relatively speaking, of course, were willing to let him talk.

"Harry? Why's everyone here?" Remus asked, not having known anyone but himself, Harry and Sirius would be there.

"I'm trying to think of the best place to start," he replied with a sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair, a habit he had never been able to break.

"I've always found the beginning of whatever tale to be the easiest," Emma offered. "The rest just seems to flow out of its own accord."

Harry smiled appreciatively and nodded, deciding to take her advice and pulled out his wand, "I, Harry James Potter, do hereby swear on my magic and my life that everything I say while at Potter Manor until midnight tonight is, to the best of my knowledge and memory, true. So mote it be."

After an intense flash of light, Sirius leapt to his feet and and yelled at Harry. "What in the bloody hell do you think you're doing! You could kill yourself just by saying something that could possibly be taken the wrong way!"

Harry nodded calmly, already knowing that. "Yes, I know. But I needed all of you to believe what I had to say."

"I'm sorry," Dan asked, looking between everyone and realizing only himself and Emma appeared to not understand what was happening. "What exactly did he just do?"

Sirius whipped his head back and forth between Harry and Dan and growled at his godson, far from pleased with the boy. "He just took an oath that his magic made binding. If he lies in any way until midnight tonight, he will lose his magic and die."

"What!" Emma screeched. While she didn't understand what was happening, she understood the explanation clearly enough. "How could you be so irresponsible!"

"Mum! It had to be done, otherwise, you wouldn't have believed him!" Hermione explained, making everyone look at her.

"You mean you're in on this?" Emma asked, looking shocked.

"Yes, I was. But there's no helping it. What we have to tell you is so beyond anything rational, even in the wizarding world, that we had to have some way to prove we were telling the truth."

Emma searched her daughter's face and then to the adult wizards and asked, "there's no way around this?"

"No," Sirius said angrily, falling back onto the couch and glaring at Harry who remained unaffected. "It's done already. You had better be very careful, Harry."

Harry nodded as Dobby set down four bottles of firewhiskey, several of butterbeer, water, juice and a small assortment of other goodies. "First, I am going to say that I am Harry James Potter. Son of James and Lily Potter. While my physical body is currently thirteen, my mind is actually twenty-eight. Luna's is twenty-seven and Hermione's is twenty-nine."

Sirius and Remus both dropped the butterbeers they had back on the table and reached for a bottle of firewhiskey each, much to the surprise of the Grangers who recognized, and smelled, it as alcohol, very strong alcohol, after they handed a bottle to Dan. Sirius shook his head and sighed. "Trust me, you two are going to want the strong stuff. Whatever the hell they're about to tell us, it apparently has to do with time-travel."

"Harry!" Remus spluttered, looking between the children frantically. "You can't tell us anything! You can't even change anything! If you do, then you're create a paradox or something else equally horrifying!"

Hermione shook her head and gathered everyone's attention. "No. Normally you would be right, but the Fairy Queen, Lilith, helped us. The rules of time aren't the same as they would be for us and, since they are the ones who sent us back, we followed their rules. We'll get there in a little bit, but we have nearly fifteen years to talk about here. Just listen."

Dan decided to pour him and his wife a bottle of the stuff they were just handed and decided to sit back. Whatever the hell it was, it was better than a pregnant daughter.

"Okay," Harry began anew. "I'm going to give an abridged version of events for now. Once we have the major stuff explained, we can go more in depth with it later." He got a chorus of agreements and so he continued.

"Originally, next year there would be a tournament known as the Tri-Wizard Tournament. It hasn't been done in a long time due to the death rate. Most of those who compete in it die. I was forced to enter by someone entering my name illegally and no one stopping the tournament."

"What!" Sirius shouted, getting pulled back down by Remus and waved off by Harry.

"Let me continue. You can ask your questions later. Anyway, near the end of the year during the final task, I was kidnapped and used in a necromantic ritual to revive Voldemort. Did Hermione tell you about Voldemort," Harry asked the Grangers, not having asked the girl before about it. Getting nods in the affirmative, he continued on.

"The Ministry spent the whole next year discrediting me and Dumbledore and Dumbledore was actively keeping me weak and in the dark about almost everything so that he could use me against him as a martyr, which is what led to the downfall of anything that was good in the world. At the end of the year in which Voldemort was sending me visions, he made me think he had captured and was torturing Sirius," Harry said, pointing at his godfather. "He's my godfather and he knew I'd want to save him. I didn't know what Voldemort was after, but it was a prophecy about me and him and only the two of us could pick it up. He couldn't go in himself for fear of being seen or caught, so he tricked me into going. It was a trap, and Sirius came to rescue me, Hermione, Luna, Neville Longbottom, Ron and Ginny Weasley and then died while fighting his cousin, Bellatrix LeStrange." Harry was forced to ignore the wide eyes and gasps from the wizards in the room, but the elder Grangers were beginning to fall behind.

"Wait," Emma asked. "You're saying all of this is from the future? Is that what he mentioned a moment ago?" She asked, pointing at Sirius who had brought up time-travel.

"Perhaps I could best answer that," a new voice said from the fireplace that was to the side of everyone. Looking over at the newcomer, all eyes widened except for one quirky blonde's, whose narrowed as she growled in the back of her throat.

"Santa!" Like a bat out of Hades, the blonde had ran and leapt the majority of the distance between the couch and Santa, attaching arms and legs around the sack that was tossed over his shoulder as he moved to get out of her way, thus moving the bag directly into her path, which was her entire plan. "Quick! I've got his bag! Get him!"

"Deja vu," Hermione mumbled, blinking at the scene before her.

"Hey! Get off of my sack you little hooligan!" Santa yelled, shaking the bag furiously and making Luna giggle madly as she made surprised sounds with each movement and getting dizzy. It was oddly fun.

"I won this thing fair and square last time, now gimmie!"

With an aggravated moan, Santa let his bag fall, landing on top of the surprised Luna who grunted as she landed on her bum before cackling madly and taking off with the booty.



Rating: M – Mature themes, Violence, Nudity, Language, Adult Situations, Lots and lots of innuendo (see section on lemons and limes for more detail.)

Genre: Action, Adventure, Comedy, Drama, Fantasy, Parody and Romance


Fairy Queen Lilith sends Santa to Harry, Hermione and Luna after ten years of losing the war to Voldemort and they go back in time to fix it all. Proactive!Gray!H/Hr/L, Nev/Sus B

Lemons: This story is planned to have naughties, but not really much. They're simply too young to make it realistic, though the use of aging potions could make it work out. This is what is planned for the wedding night.

Limes: Expect lots of limes. My plans are to describe plenty of flirting and innuendo and sexual acts up to 'heavy petting', kissing, etc to the extent of anything found in a rated 'R' movie. And a whole lot of suggestive themes. Basically, anything but out-and-out sex or any penetration. Oral sex, without descriptions, detailing that someone is nude and their reactions and the like are probably the extent of what I write. Sex-based humor is easy to write, funny and they're thirty-year olds in thirteen-year old bodies. Hormones shall be their arch nemesis!


Technology is going to be up-to-date. Therefore, I will not go back to check release dates on movies, music (artists or songs) and the like.