"Ryohei's Thought Process Cannot Be Breached" – Kiba Inubake


I love and loathe myself at the same time... Oh, Ryohei~


Chapter 2: "The World According To Ryohei"

"Kyokogen!" You hear me say it all the time, but what does that word mean to me? Hi, I'm Ryohei Sasagawa. And today, I'm going to tell you what it's like to be me.

First, I'll extremely tell you how I start off my extreme mornings. I wake up at 4:00 AM, extremely crack a dozen eggs and drink the egg yolk, and then I go on an extreme jog for 3 extreme hours. I like to take an extreme jog in the woods sometimes. Occasionally, I see bears and I can't help but feel the urge to box extremely! In some cases where I can't contain my extreme emotions, I fight the bear right there and then. Some people call me extreme. Others call me extreme. What will you call me?

Once I've finished my extreme jog, I head down to the local gym. I then work out for 4 extreme hours. They have a boxing arena there too, so I'll extremely fight anyone who's also there. I go by the ring name "Ryohei of the Extreme Lion Punch". I usually win, thanks to my extreme left hook.

After I've spent 8 extreme hours exercising, I hit the showers. I shower so extremely, other people just can't seem to keep up, in terms of extremeness. And then once I've finished my extreme shower, I go out to eat an extreme lunch, mainly consisting of elephant, rhinoceros, and sautéed eggplant with mushrooms on top. The only thing not extreme about this lunch, though, is the bill. ;D

To finish off an excellent first half of my extreme day, I like to wrestle a Mexican fighter bull. I wear red just to taunt them. (A/N: I know color doesn't really affect a bull's rage, so don't tell me what I already know.) Then I take a break and go to watch extreme boxing matches. Once I start to get hungry, I go home and cook myself boars' skin with creamy gravy and egg and tuna salad for dinner. It doesn't get any healthier than that!

By now, you're probably thinking, "Ryohei, you must be tired! Aren't you ever gonna stop?" Well, the answer is an extreme NO! I can't let that happen! I must be vigilant! Perseverance is key to extreme victory~! So what I do is, I beat on a punching bag in my garage for 20 extreme minutes without stopping, and then I do 300 extreme crunches. Why do you think my extreme body is as hard as a rock? Anyway, after that I take another break and watch more extreme boxing videos to learn new extreme tricks and techniques. Then I run over to the nearby boxing arena and test out the new extreme attacks I picked up.

Once I finish my boxing, I hit the showers again, and like I said earlier, my showers are very extreme. Extreme temperatures, extreme temperature changes, extremely short time…you get the idea (and hopefully, extremely). Then I head home for an extreme slumber…of 5 hours, before I wake up again to repeat the extreme process. Now you know what it's like…to be me! –End of Extreme Story!


Is anyone willing to count the number of times Ryohei said "extreme"? :D