Summary: All a girl really needs to cure her heartbreak is her best chick friend, jammies, liquor and a radio.
A/N: Okay, so I figured after the whole Stella's apartment burns down/Lindsay realizes Danny is dicking around thing, they totally needed a girls night. Plus, I like making people laugh.
Dedication: To Peanut Butter, I'm still calling your emo, Bob. -Pickles
Disclaimer: I, like, don't own them. .gee.
It was the close of shift and Stella Bonasera saw Danny Messer storm out of the locker room like a angst riddled teenager. She sighed, wondering how Lindsay was holding up -while she had known Danny longer, part of her was overtly protective of their newest team member. Some days she wondered how men could be so stupid. If she had her way, any guy who acted like Danny was, would be unable to sit down from the high heeled shoe permanently lodged in their colon.
Closing her locker and swinging her bag over her shoulder, Stella left the locker room ready for a nice long bath in the hotel room Mac had booked for her. On her way out, she passed the office Danny and Lindsay shared and saw her friend staring blankly at her computer screen, she walked in, "An arsonist burned down my apartment."
"My boyfriend is screwing his neighbor." Lindsay monotoned, not even looking away from the computer.
"You win." Stella fell into Danny's chair, "What are your thoughts on getting insanely drunk?"
"If it also involves pajamas and cheezy eighties songs, I am so in." Lindsay sighed, then growled. Her hand connected with the computer monitor, "I hate this thing."
"Okay. C'mon. We have got to get you out of here." Stella stood up and grabbed Lindsay's arm.
"But...Stell...the..." Lindsay fought back but gave in and let her friend drag her out of the building.
They took a cab to Lindsay's apartment. Once inside, Lindsay checked her messages.
"You have two new messages.." Lindsay hit 'play'.
"Hey, it's Danny.. look-" She pushed 'delete'.
"Lindsay, I just got home-" 'delete'.
"That was a little harsh." Stella said, falling down on the couch.
"Him. His neighbor. The screwing." Lindsay raised an eyebrow, "And I'm unfair?!"
Stella held up her hands in surrender, "Did I mention my apartment burned down today?"
"Didn't Mac put you up in some really sweet new motel though?" Lindsay asked, collapsing into the recliner and toeing off her boots.
"And I want to listen to honeymooners doing it?" Stella made a disgusted face.
"Probably Danny and some girl off the street. Oh wait, that's what his pool table is for. I am such an idiot." Lindsay put her head in her hands.
"Linds.." Stella said softly.
"Stay here." Lindsay let out a muffled offer, "You won't have to listen to anyone doing it. I can promise that."
"Okay, where is your liquor?" Stella asked, standing up, "You need a Funky Monkey."
"Wha-" Lindsay scrunched up her face.
"Trust me." Stella laughed, "Now point me in the direction of the booze!"
"Thataway." Lindsay directed.
"Go put your sweats on, that's an order Monroe." Stella gave her a mock glare and Lindsay giggled and saluted.
"I LIKE THIS!" Lindsay declared on the third cup of 'Funky Monkey', "What is it again?"
"Whatever was in your cabinet. You can really taste the Boone." Stella laughed, nursing her second cup.
"I like this." Lindsay repeated herself and giggled.
"I think my cup is starting to melt." Stella laughed, "I want more."
"None for me." Lindsay said, but Stella was already grabbing her cup, "STELLA!"
"Live a little, Linds." Stella called from the kitchen.
"There are jalopeno poppers in the freezer." Lindsay got up and walked into the kitchen, opening her freezer.
"Thatta girl." Stella gave her a half-hug as she handed her another plastic cup full of the punch.
"I hate you." Lindsay said, taking a sip.
"Mhmm." Stella walked over to the radio, "We need music."
"Yes please." Lindsay tore open the package of jalopeno poppers and dumped them on a dish. She shoved them in a microwave and turned it on.
Stella was surfing through stations when Lindsay heard the opening beats to her favorite song, "THAT ONE!"
"What?" Stella laughed.
Lindsay bounced over to her, "This is my jam!"
"Oh dear." Stella grabbed her iPhone.
Danny Messer was laying in his bed -alone. Letterman was rambling about President Bush and Danny was sulking in his own stupidity. The phone on his bedside table viberated and he grabbed it, sliding it open. It was a video text from Stella. The title said, "Don't be stupid, you know she loves you."
He hit play and laughed as he saw a very drunk Lindsay dancing around to some song in her pajamas. She sang into a wooden spoon, "Baby, I got plans tonight, you don't know nothin' about, I've been sittin' around way too long, tryin' to figure you out."
Lindsay danced around, "I'm going out toniiiight in my red high heels!"
Danny felt his heart drop -this was a break up song.
"Oh you can watch me walk, if you want to, want to, I bet you want me back now, don't you, don't you, I'm about to show you just how missin' me feels in my red high heels." Lindsay belted out, reaching over and turning the music up louder.
She fell to her knees and screamed along with Kellie Pickler's newest hit. Danny sighed, this must be payback.
And the worst part, he knew he derserved every bit of it.
"I just kicked you to the curb in my red high heeeeeeeeeeels!" Lindsay yelled and he heard Stella laugh in the background.
"Shake it girl." Stella spurred her on.
"I'm about to show you just how missin' me feels, in my red high heels, in my red high heeeeeeeels. In my red high heels!" Lindsay finished and the song faded out.
Danny couldn't figure out why Stella had sent the video to him, was she drawing a line in the sand? That she was on Lindsay's side? Danny frowned and then he heard the words that broke his heart.
"I miss him." Lindsay spoke softly in a broken hearted voice. The video ended and Danny fell back against his pillows, he had to fix this.
The next morning, Lindsay Monroe and Stella Bonasera woke to the smell of coffee and eggs cooking. They had sacked out on the couch and the floor. Lindsay and Stella looked at each other in confusion, "What the hell?"
"I have no idea." Stella whispered harshly.
"Uhm...hello?" Lindsay called out and then held her head, "Damn. I hate Funky Monkeys."
"I know. I feel like I sucked on a key." Stella groaned.
"Ladies." Danny walked in carrying two glasses of water.
"What are you doing here, Danny?" Lindsay glared at him.
"After Stella's video message last night... I feel like I had some pennance to do." Danny put the water down and reached into his jean pocket, "Tylenol."
"What video?" Lindsay asked Stella.
"Uhm." Stella grabbed her phone, "I have to go. Out there. In the street. Witnesses."
"What video, Stella?" Lindsay demanded.
"Here." Stella handed her the iPhone, "Give it to me later. I'll see you at work."
"Sit." Lindsay demanded.
"May I open with I'm sorry?" Stella offered.
Lindsay found the video and hit play, "Oh my God! I am gonna kill you! Stella!"
"You're the one who tossed in the surprise ending!" Stella exclaimed, "Don't shoot, I'm just the messenger."
"Uh Stell.." Danny spoke softly.
"Oh yeah. I'm getting lost." Stella grabbed her phone and her bag, running out of the apartment.
"I'm gonna kill her." Lindsay began to pace, holding her head.
"Montana, sit down before you puke." Danny urged.
"I was drunk Danny, really drunk. I'm still really pissed off at you." Lindsay glared at him.
"Well, you still need to eat. So sit, let me fix you a plate." Danny told her, directing her to the chair and disappearing into the kitchen. Lindsay sat silently and he came back in with a plate full of food, "Here, Montana. Your favorite."
"Just.." Lindsay moved her eggs around with her fork, "Did she touch the pool table?"
"Our pool table?" Danny clarified, "Never."
"I don't want to lose my best friend, Danny."
"I'm sittin' right here, Montana."
Lindsay leaned in and kissed him lightly, "I think you need a word added to your vocab, Cowboy."
"Enlighten me." Danny whispered, his head resting on her shoulder.
"Monogamy. It means you and me and only us."
"And sometimes Stella."
"Only when you need your ass handed to you." Lindsay laughed.
Stella Bonasera stood on the other side of the door cheering and squeeing into her hand. She hit the first number on her speed dial and when the line clicked open, "Mac, I won. Pay up."
A/N: I know, I know. They never talked about the Rikki situation and that Lindsay "knew" but whatever. That's what fanfic is for. :) Reviews are welcome, encouraged, framed and manteled.