Gotham's Got Talent! Episode: 1
Joker: Good evening ladies and gentlemen! Tonight, is the season premier of what is going to be the, uh, greatest show this Summer. Right kiddies?
*hostages nod heads*
Donna: You know, we could have easily gotten an actual audience instead of kidnaping Dr. Arkham and his staff.
Bruce: *panic attack* This, this is awful! Batman's not suppose to do suff like this! My career is going down the toilet!
Joker: No need to worry, Batsy! *puts glasses on Bruce* No one will recognize you now!
Alfred: Shall I introduce the first contestant, Miss Donna?
Donna: Certainly Alfred!
Alfred: Here we have a young man and his pet whale all the way from the south side of Gotham City. He has been waiting for a chance to prove himself a winner and show his talent off to the world. Ladies and gentlemen, please give a warm welcome to our first ever contestant!
Crane: Hello, my name is -
Crane: I haven't done my act yet!
Bruce: That is one freakishly big jelly bean.
Donna: That's a whale, stupid. Now, what do you and your whale do?
Crane: Mr. Po Po and I are professional stunt doubles and we will be performing an act so deadly, only a handful of people have survived.
Bruce: Well, I look forward to seeing this. Good luck.
Crane: Hit it Alfred!
Alfred: *starts CD player - dramatic music starts playing*
Crane: *has long staring contest with Mr. Po Po*
Bruce: That was amazing! You have my vote!
Joker: In all my long year in Gotham, I have never seen anything so utterly...Chaotic. Really, you had me on the edge of my seat. I say, Yes!
Donna: *shocked look* What - I - Why - FINE. You have my vote too.
Crane: YAY! We're going to the next round, Mr. Po Po!
Mr. Po Po: Moo.
Alfred: ... *Ahem* Our next contestant tried to destroy Gotham not too long ago. He personally trained my Master, Mr. Bruce Wayne, and he somehow managed to survive a train crash. Don't ask me how. With a new chance at life, he wants to destroy civilizations with style. Contestant number Two.
Bruce: Hey, Al!
Ras Al Ghul: I told you not to call me that.
Joker: Is there some reason why you're wearing my, uh, Nurse Outfit?
Ras Al Ghul: It is part of my act. I believe that when destroying a great city, one must tear it apart not only physically, but mentally as well.
Donna: Uh, okay then. Show us what you got.
*Ninjas dance out playing violins*
Ras Al Ghul: *Starts tap dancing - does an elegant jump in the air - skips around tossing flowers*
Donna: I'm speechless. Your dancing is so amazing, yet brain damaging at the same time. I vote Yes!
Ras Al Ghul: *sob* Thank you.
Joker: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHH! That, that was hilarious. You have my vote.
Bruce: YOU NEVER TAUGHT ME HOW TO DO THAT!
Ras Al Ghul: If you vote for me, I'll teach you how.
Bruce: Deal. You're going to the next round!
Ras Al Ghul: BWHAHAH!
Alfred: Our last contestant of the evening was once known as "Gotham's White Knight". Because of a certain make over however, this DA decided that he had a new calling in live. Sir, don't touch those cookies. *punches Harvey*
Harvey: Hello, all!
Joker: Oh, crud. It's him.
Bruce: What brings you to Gotham's Got Talent, Harvey?
Harvey: I believe in world peace.
Donna: Other than that.
Harvey: Oh, uh...I've always wanted to go into modeling for underwear commercials, so that's what my act's going to -
Harvey: Oh, cruel world!
Alfred: Thank you for joining for our first episode of Gotham's Got Talent. Please join us soon for our next one, some time in the future.