Chapter 4

A whole month had passed by since I had accepted David's proposal and I had not even so much as crossed paths with Doctor MacNeill once during that time. I had heard through the grapevine that his wife, Margaret, had decided to go on to Atlanta. There were many times when I wanted to go to him and talk to him about it, but I had no idea what I would say to him or if he would even receive me and that kept me away. The wedding was also only one month away and the planning for it kept me extremely busy. Fairlight had been over everyday helping me with preparations. We were now sitting on the front porch sipping lemonade and taking a break from working on my dress.

"A penny for your thoughts Mizz Christy."

"Oh Fairlight," I responded, "I don't even think my thoughts are worth a penny."

"I bet I could guess what you are thinkin. You're thinkin of Doc MacNeill."

I opened my mouth to protest, but Fairlight waved her hand in the air and continued on. "Your feelins for the Doc ain't gonna go away just because you're gettin hitched to the preacher."

"Fairlight my feelings for Doctor MacNeill are purely admiration for his skills as a doctor."

"Who are you tryin to convince, me or yourself?" I knew the answer to that question, but I was afraid to answer it. Farilight could see the struggle that was going on within me. "Christy, the kind of love that I have with Jeb only comes along once in a lifetime. The man you marry needs to be your best friend, the person you tell all of your deepest thoughts to and the person that you trust more than anyone else on the face of this earth. When that person comes along you have to hold on to them and fight for them. Remember God works things out in his own time and sometimes we just need to be patient enough to wait for them. Anyhow, that's the best advice I can give ya and it's gettin late. My youngins and their pa will be wantin their supper before long." With that she rose from her chair and headed down the steps of the mission house, pausing at the bottom she looked back at me and smiled with deep blue all knowing eyes, "I have a feelin that everything is going to work out just fine so don't you fret none Mizz Christy." I wished I had her confidence, but it just wasn't there. I had to find a way to get my thoughts away from Neil MacNeill, but it seemed the harder I tried the more my heart would just not let me.

Chapter 5

That night I found that no matter how hard I tried I just could not sleep. I tossed this way and that thinking of all the events that had unfolded in the last month. My sleep was restless so I finally sat up and threw my legs over the side of the bed. Fearing that I might wake the others I slowly got up and tip toed across the wood floor to my clothes. I hurriedly dressed myself, being careful not to make a sound. I then grabbed my shoes and silently went downstairs and out the front door. I wanted to take a short walk in hopes that it might help my elusiveness towards sleep. As soon as my shoes were on I headed for the river. I needed to hear the calming flow of the water as it gurgled over the stones and made its way downstream through the tall trees that had stood on this mountain for thousands of years. It was a warm autumn night, but there was a nice breeze flowing through the trees and rustling their leaves. It almost seemed as if the trees were whispering secrets to one another while their long branches danced in the wind. I looked up to see the stars twinkling like small diamonds in the backdrop of an otherwise dark sky, the only other light coming from the illumination of the moon. How anyone could say there was no God when surrounded by such beauty was a mystery to me.

All of the sudden I heard a twig snap and I whirled around to see a pair of hazel eyes staring at me with intense longing. A small smile spread across Neil's face, "Miss Huddleston we really must stop meeting this way. Remember the trouble we caused last time?"

"I remember very well Doctor. I didn't realize I had walked so far down the river." I knew in my heart that was a lie. I knew exactly how far I had come, but I had not anticipated finding anyone awake at this hour. We stood there as if frozen in time staring at each other for a moment. He was tall with rugged good looks and the moon cast a brilliant glow over his curly golden red hair making it stand out more then it usually did. The smile lines around his sparkling hazel eyes made him all that more attractive. I finally broke the silence between us. "I miss you Neil. I miss our friendship and the children miss your science lessons. I don't want to lose you as a friend." I noticed he was staring at the ring on my finger. It made me feel very self conscious and I quickly folded my hands behind my back to hide it from him.

"Christy, you can't always have everything you want. It would not be proper for you and me to be close friends when you are engaged to another man. I will not compromise your integrity that way." His voice sounded sad and it touched me that he was more concerned about my reputation then satisfying his own personal desires. There was something different about the Neil MacNeill that was standing before me now then the one standing before me over a month ago.

"Your reputation is at stake too Doctor. You are still a married and the people of the cove need you. If they don't trust you, you can't be of any help to them."

"Christy," he began slowly as if he was trying to formulate in his mind the words he wanted to say. "I got a letter from a hospital in Atlanta about a week ago. It came from a doctor there who specializes in Tuberculosis cases."

"Margaret?" I questioned.

He shook his head yes, his eyes having a faraway look in them. "She did not make it. She died there. They sent me a copy of the death certificate and her wedding rings back to me. He said she had to told him to send them to me and that she wanted me to be happy."

I didn't know what to say so I said the only thing that I knew to say for situations like this, "I'm sorry Neil." My heart really meant it and it ached for the man standing in front of me. I couldn't help but want to reach out to him and somehow shield him from all of the pain and regrets that Margaret's death must have caused him.

"Don't be Christy. I had settled my issues with her and had forgiven her already. I realized I had to if I was ever going to have peace with my past and be able to move forward. I found my old family Bible shortly after our last meeting. I was very distraught over your decision to marry Reverend Grantland and I had no one to go to so I opened it up and began to read it. I read about what it meant to forgive and to be truly forgiven. That night I prayed that God would forgive my stubbornness and that he would help me to forgive others the way He forgave me. When I was done I felt as if the weight of the world had been lifted off my shoulders and a sense of peace enveloped me like none other I had ever felt before." He paused for a minute as if deciding whether he should continue or not. I could see the agonizing turmoil playing out in his eyes. "Christy, you have to know that I love you. I have for a very long time now and I want you to be happy. If there is anyone that I know that deserves it, it's you. If marrying Grantland is what makes you happy then I will not stand in your way."

I stood there staring at him, astonished by every word he had just spoke. He loved me to the point where he was willing to sacrifice his own happiness for mine. He really was a different Neil MacNeill. He had a peace about him that I had never seen before and it was genuine. I was trying to hold back the tears that desperately wanted to flow from my eyes, but one escaped anyways. I felt my cheeks blush as Neil's eyes connected with mine, locking me in an intense gaze. He then lifted his hand to gently cup my face and wipe the lone tear away with his thumb.

He finally broke away from me clearing his throat and flashing me a teasing grin. "It's late Miss Huddleston. You should probably get back to the mission before someone notices you are gone and sends a search party out. We certainly don't want another scandal on her hands do we now?" He gave me a quick smile and a small chuckle escaped his lips that completely warmed me on the inside. On an impulse I reached up and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and without daring to look for his reaction I hurriedly scampered back to the mission house.

To be continued…..