The Christmas Party is underway as everyone see's what they got. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach. If I did, I would probably be too busy drawing instead of writing Fanfictions


7: The Best Christmas Party Ever

The party was turning out good.

Well, as good as a party involving arguing arrancars can be. It was held inside Aizen's throne room and everyone was invited. There were Espada, Fraccion, numeros, the Exequias (well, only Rudobon), and even Iceringer and Demora showed up for a little bit.

Aizen sat upon his throne with a pleased look on his face. He was flanked on both sides by Gin, who was drinking what appeared to be eggnog from a flask, and Tosen, who just stood there motionless like always. The room itself was decorated with a lot of Christmas attire; Aizen even got the largest desert tree in Hueco Mundo and decorated it with all sorts of knick knacks.

A smile similar to that of Gin appeared on Aizen's face as he said to his companions, "What a wonderful party, don't you think?"

"It seems to be going well Captain," Gin replied. "I gotta say, I've never seen you so happy before."

"There's just something about Christmas that brings out the best in me," replied the arrancars ruler. "I don't know how to explain it, but it always puts me in a good mood."

All of the Espada put their gifts for Aizen, Gin, and Tosen down by his throne when they entered, but had to give their gifts to their own Espada at some point during the party.

Coyote Starrk sighed as he leaned against one of the pillars with some kind of drink in his hand. Lilynette suddenly leapt up behind him and kicked him in his leg. "Whatcha doin' Starrk?!"

"Get the hell away from me," he said, taking a sip of his drink.

"You're not still mad at me are you?" his other half inquired.

"You liked to the police and got me locked up in prison for a night. Do you know what that's like?"

"No," she responded brightly, "but at least I got what I wanted."

Starrk sighed as he put his drink down and picked up his gift. "Might as well give it to her now," he said, walking towards Harribel. "Get it over with."

She was standing there with her three Fraccion arguing over something. "Hey Tia," Starrk said. "I was your Secret Santa; here's your gift. Hope you like it."
Harribel wordlessly took the gift and opened it. She removed the item to find that it was a case of different colored lipstick.

"I wasn't sure what you liked," Starrk admitted, a little embarrassed, "but I got you something that you can use anytime."

Harribel set her gift down and wordlessly undid the top part of her zipper to her outfit, showing Starrk her hollow mask covering her face. Starrk understood what this meant as he just looked down at the ground and slinked away wordlessly.


Zommari decided that now was his chance. Taking out the crown he had stolen, as he began to walk over to Aizen. He knew he was supposed to just drop it off, but that wouldn't stand out enough. He had to give it to him face-to-face.

It was then that he ran into Barragan, who immediately said, "Watch it ant; do you know who's walking he—"

He stopped when his eyes fell upon the crown Zommari was holding. "Who's that for?"

"Aizen-sama," Zommari replied. "What a coincidence though, I was supposed to give you a gift as well."

Rummaging through his pocket, he found the item and handed it to Barragan. "Here you go."

The Segunda opened it immediately, hoping it was something of equal value, but was highly disappointed when he saw it was just a bottle of cologne. Speechless, Barragan just kept looking down at his gift and looking back at the crown.

"Well, I have to give my gift to Aizen-sama now, goodbye."

"Wait!" Barragan said, nearly throwing himself upon the Septima.

"What?!"

"You should give me the crown, and Aizen the cologne," Barragan pleaded. "I mean, he probably doesn't want a crown anyway."

"Don't be ridiculous," he said, as he quickly sped away.

Barragan wasn't going to leave it at that, as he quickly chased after him.

Zommari appeared in front of Aizen, startling him for a second, but he quickly regained his composure asking, "What is it my dear Zommari?"

Zommari kneeled down and lifted the crown up saying, "I saw this, and I couldn't help but think of you Aizen-sama. I hope you enjoy it."

Aizen picked up the crown, inspected it, and responded, "Not that I'm touched that you would get me such a thing Zommari, it's just…" He was trying to find the right words to say. "…I don't much care for the whole 'wearing crowns' thing. I hope you understand."

"But—" Zommari started to protest.

"Then give it to me boss!" Barragan said, cutting Zommari off. "I'll gladly take that crown if you don't want it."

"Very well, here you go Barragan, but if I do this, I don't want any more assassination attempts upon my life. Do you understand?"

"Of course Boss!" Barragan replied, taking the crown and running off. He was lying, he'd try to kill Aizen tonight, just like he always does.

"But Aizen-sama, I specifically got that gift for you and—" Zommari started again.

"That is enough, you are dismissed Zommari," Aizen said, waving his hand away.

Zommari was so upset he began to walk away. It was then, however, that he ran into Ulquiorra. He looked at him with his melancholic expression and said, "I was supposed to get you a gift, so…here you go."

He gave Zommari a packet of Five Gum, not even attempted to be wrapped in any way. Zommari was so distraught he didn't care, as he took the packet of gum and used his fasted sonido to go back into his quarters for he could listen to My Chemical Romance for the rest of the day.


Szayel Aporro Granz had to be careful. He had already given Grimmjow his gift (which he was quite happy with, yelling how he could now beat Kurosaki and began downing it immediately), and gave Aizen his "Disney Princess' Tea Set", but he had to find a way to get Tosen's gift to him. After giving his other gifts, he quickly went back to his laboratory to see Blankey, the dog he stole, eating Verona. He didn't much care about Verona dying; he could always make another one, but he was concerned about this dog running amok again in his laboratory.

Putting his palm to his face, Szayel snapped his fingers and his countless Fraccion appeared out of nowhere to restrain the dog. While he was being held down, Szayel injected him with a tranquilizer to knock him out.

While the dog was out, Szayel carefully put him in wrapping paper (don't worry, he left air holes), and before you knew it, the dog was ready to be transported.

Carrying the dog himself, he quickly snuck over to where Tosen's gifts were supposed to be, and gently lay the dog down for him. After that, he sped away so he wouldn't be noticed.

A little bit of time passed, and during that time, Blankey began to wake up from his tranquil slumber. Immediately sensing something wrong, the dog got up, ripped through it's wrapping enough, and immediately ran for Tosen.

The Ex-Captain was not expecting such a thing to happen, and as such, Blankey was able to sink his teeth into his leg quite easily. Tosen let out a roar of pain as this caught Aizen and Gin's attention (albeit it appeared Gin was a little tipsy from his "eggnog"). Tosen immediately shook the dog off and it began to run out of Aizen's throne room.

Aizen was about to say something, but Gin stopped him, saying, "Don't worry 'bout a thing Captain…I'll shhtop that animal."

He pulled out his zanpakuto and said, "Shoot to kill, Shinso!"

His sword immediately extended and started to fly towards the sprinting dog. Unfortunately, Gin's aim wasn't the best due to the eggnog mixed with sake he had been drinking, and thus, the sword flew off course, killing a hapless Numero instead of the animal. Because of Gin's failure, the dog was able to easily escape and was never seen again.

Meanwhile, Szayel saw this, and crept back into a dark corner.


"Here you go Starrk," Grimmjow said, holding out a crudely wrapped gift.

Starrk looked up from his corner. He had gotten there to hide away from Harribel, in case she came back, and eventually fell asleep in the fetal position.

"I was your Secret Santa," Grimmjow said. "So here you go."

Starrk took the gift and opened it, revealing a normal pillow with a white case. "Uhh…thanks…" he replied. Then after inspecting it, he said, "It looks used."

Only Starrk would be able to tell if a pillow looks used or not.

"That's 'cause after Tosen interrupted my fight, I went back a bit later to fight Kurosaki, but he was gone, so I broke into his room and stole his pillow."

Starrk would only realize the strangeness of this situation later, as he took the pillow, put it on the floor, and fell asleep using it.


Aaroniero had finally found the perfect moment to go up to Ulquiorra. Yammy had finally walked away from him (eating from his sack of dried meat that Nnoitra bought for him), and now the Cuatro was alone.

Aaroniero braced himself and walked up to Ulquiorra. "I was supposed to give you a gift," he held out his gift. "Hope you like it."

Ulquiorra took the gift and opened it rather swiftly, but what he saw truly made him speechless. He was staring at…some kind of statue made out of what seemed to be garbage. "What is it?"

Aaroniero pointed out the two crudely made figurines most prominent saying, "It's you and me, holding hands and running down a meadow. See, there's the little field we're in."

He pointed to where the figurines were grounded.

Ulquiorra didn't know whether he was supposed to be repulsed or thankful, but he reacted in the only way he knew how. "It's trash."

"Yes, it's all made of garbage; I even got a homeless man to help me."

"No, I mean it's trash in a metaphorical sense, not in reality."

And just to make the message more clear, he charged a cero in his hand and utterly demolished the gift. Needless to say, Aaroniero was distraught. "That took me five fucking hours to make!"

"What a waste of time," he simply responded.

Aaroniero responded the only way he knew how, with force. Letting out a roar, he leapt at Ulquiorra. Unfortunately, the Noveno forgot that he was five ranks below the Cuatro, and was dealt a swift punch to the gut, winding him and forcing him to clutch his stomach.

"Hmph, trash," Ulquiorra said, as he walked away.

Just then, Harribel appeared with her three Fraccion holding something behind her back. She tapped Aaroniero on the shoulder and he turned around to see her. "I was supposed to get you a gift," she explained, "and I think I got the perfect thing for you. I know that you're always in the dark, so I got you something to really help light up your place."

With that, she and her three Fraccion pulled out a disco ball and held it right in front of Aaroniero's face…uh, liquid tube. The large ball reflected the light to the nth degree, utterly blinding the Noveno. Giving a shriek of terror, he knocked the ball out of her hand, destroying it, and fled away from the party; he wasn't seen for the rest of the day.

"You think he'd be more grateful," Harribel sighed.

"You know him, he's a freak," was all Mila-Rose responded with.


Aizen, Tosen, and Gin were in the middle of opening their own presents from the Espada. Gin (who was now completely smashed), had gotten a fox plushy from Starrk, a pair of small British spectacles from Barragan, a gray t-shirt that said "I love Foxy ladies" with a picture of a scantily dressed fox-woman from Harribel, (which he immediately put on upon getting), an IOU note from Ulquiorra, and a pair of cheap earrings from Nnoitra, (which he also put on, thinking in his debilitative looked good on him).

Tosen had just opened a box with only a piece of paper in it. Tosen took out the paper, and, despite being blind, could tell there was some kind of threatening message on it. He showed it to Aizen and asked, "What is on this?"

"It appears to be a crudely drawn middle finger," Aizen replied, "saying 'Fuck you!' over and over again."

Tosen knew immediately that it was Grimmjow's.

He also got a pair of sunglasses from Zommari, nothing from Szayel (not knowing the dog was supposed to be his), one of those girly machines that braids hair from Aaroniero, and a CD title "Kanye West's Greatest Hits" from Yammy (which he detested immediately, not prone to liking rap music).

Aizen had just finished opening his ten presents and was a tad disappointed. Out of ten presents, the most notable gifts were hair gel and Star Wars: The Complete Saga (which Aizen was secretly a fan of). Everything else he got was tea related, whether it be a tea set, tea cups (broken ones at that), or a gift certificate to a place called "Starbucks".

Aizen tried not to let this put a damper on his Christmas spirit, however, as he turned towards Gin and Aizen with two gifts saying, "Merry Christmas!"

His two subordinates were surprised to say the least, as Tosen opened his, but couldn't tell immediately what it was.

"I know you love to cook," Aizen said with a smile, "so I got you 'Rachel Ray's 30 Minute Meals Cooking Book'."

Tosen was surprisingly overjoyed at this, smiling and saying, "Thank you Aizen-sama."

Gin opened his and despite his drunken state, could tell what it was. It was a pack of dried persimmons, which he immediately opened and started eating. "Thanksh Aizshen-shama…"

"You're very welcome," he said with a smile still wide on his face.

"We got you something too," Tosen said, as he elbowed Gin.

They both took out boxes and gave it to Aizen. "You shouldn't have," he said as he opened Tosen's.

His smile disappeared for a second when he saw that he had gotten a packet of "Earl Grey Tea", but it resumed for the sake of appearances as he said, "Thank you Tosen. I appreciate it."

"Open mine Aizshen," Gin said pointing to his box.

Aizen opened his and was rather perplexed when he took out a pair of square glasses. Not saying anything, Gin decided to explain. "They're glasshes Captain, seeing as how yoursh got deshtroyed when we left Shoul Shoshiety. I thought you'd need a new pair."

"Gin, I've never needed glasses," Aizen said. "I destroyed them myself because I no longer needed them."

"Then why would you wear them for sho long in Shoul Shoshiety?"

"Because the glasses did a good job of hiding my menacing features," replied the Traitor. "Other than that, I didn't need them at all."

"Whatever," Gin said, taking another drink from his flask and walking away.

Aizen shook off what just happened and turned back around to address the people below him. "My fellow arrancars," he started with. "Christmas only comes once a year, and I thought it was necessary to allow you all to experience it before some of you die horrible painful deaths at the hands of the Gotei 13. So it is for these reasons that…they're not even listening are they?" he asked turning towards Tosen.

"No, they aren't."

Aizen sighed as he looked down and saw no one was paying attention. Starrk was off sleeping in the corner, Barragan was staring at his new crown, Harribel was trying to stop her fighting (and possibly drunk) Fraccion, Ulquiorra was off trying to find some kind of caffeine (he got hooked pretty quickly), Nnoitra was busy staring at the spoons Barragan gave him and trying to wonder their purpose, Grimmjow was downing the steroids Szayel gave him, Zommari was gone, Szayel was on the floor tinkering with his children's chemistry set, Aaroniero was gone, and Yammy was too busy eating everything in sight.

Aizen sighed, threw up his hands and said, "Screw it, just have a Merry Christmas!"

"And a Happy Holidays," Tosen added in, trying to be nondemonational.

Meanwhile, Gin was passed out in the corner drunk with a half-opened pack of dried persimmons.


And that's all Folks! Hope you enjoyed "A Very Espada Christmas"! I would like to wish a Merry Christmas to all, and Happy Holidays for anyone that would get offended at just the mentioning of Christmas

Until Next Time!

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