11All I have to say is that this chapter is crack, and fan service, and an all around sorry for being so retarded with updates. It's... fail, m'kay? I'm only partially serious when I see this is actually the next installment of this story. It is though, but it probably shouldn't count. Kami-sama, I should be killed for this. Really, strike me down, this is one the stupidest things I've ever written. Also. Finals are over, and I'm free to write for a little over a week! I'm going to try to challenge myself to one chapter per day. Hope I can!
- X-
Sasori ran a hand through his white hair, sighing, and shooed both of them out of the room. "Take her to Uchiha's room." He wasn't supposed to be violent around Keiichi, something he was already starting to show aversion to. Deidara was not helping him with this at all.
He had no problem with her, not exactly, but knew she'd start getting on his nerves.
Keiichi groaned as she was taken out of the room, rather agitated at how rough Deidara was being. His grip was hard, but that's not what was bothering her. She was still recovering from the damn poison, just how fast did he think she could go? She tripped on her feet as she walked, several times, and wasn't paid any heed, just yanked harder. Her feet were practically being dragged across the dirty floor, and she was done.
"Fucking slow down!" Deidara abruptly stopped, and glared. He let go of her bruising arm, and crossed his over his chest. "Too fast, pervert?" Still hunched over, she pulled an eyelid down in a childish manner, but knew there was chance her tongue would accidentally be bit off if he decided to yank her again, so it stayed in her mouth. She stood up straight, the boxers she was wearing dropped slightly. She was panting a bit, whether it was from anger or exhaustion, he didn't know.
"So what if I am a pervert? Huh? Whatcha gonna do about it?" Deidara's eye twitched, as his jaw clenched. "You aren't going to do anything, 'cause you're a chicken shit. A big freaking uke." Deidara's arms dropped, and so did his jaw. She was in for it.
Itachi held his chopsticks, staring at his noodles. He had not ordered this. He wasn't going to do anything about it though, he didn't need to draw attention to himself. He glared at the contents. This was ramen. Miso ramen, to be precise. He had ordered yakisoba. So, what the fuck? Sure, yakisoba was similar, but it was NOT the same!
"Switch bowls with me." Not a question. Kisame turned his head, his skin a normal human color, and looked into it. He shrugged and said, "Fine. Miso's not too bad." He swapped bowls, and started eating. Itachi did as well, somewhat unhappy. Soba wasn't yakisoba either, but he supposed it was better.
The owner's son looked over, having been watching them, and smiled. He thought, even though he wasn't into it himself, they made a cute couple. If had said it aloud though, the Heimlich would've been needed, and a medic would've had to be called for, but for a completely different reason.
Pein pinched the bridge of his nose, a vein pulsing on his forehead. The disastrous area that lay before him was too much. A broken light fixture, actually, several broken light fixtures, a shattered pot, soil all over, and what appeared to be blood. And lots of it. The dim lighting made it look worse, where it illuminated the dark liquid that merged with the soil, creating a thick ugly color.
Deidara and Keiichi sat on the floor, not too far from the puddle, chests heaving, and looking in opposite directions. Pein walked closer, and raised an eyebrow. No visual marks, however they were filthy so it was hard to tell. "So, what happened in here?" Keiichi looked up scowling, before a grin took over. "Pansy ass was trying to prove he wasn't uk-" "Because I'm NOT!" Keiichi had him pinned in less than a second; face down, glaring down at him. His head had thumped against the floor, the disgusting floor, which nobody should've been sitting on, and certainly shouldn't have been putting their face on. Her scowl returned.
"Don't you know it's rude to interrupt people?" She looked at Pein, and finished. "He tried proving he isn't uke. That worked so well for him." She reached behind herself, grabbing his butt again, and he squawked. Pein laughed lightly, though that in itself had Deidara slightly startled. He stiffened under the girl, which made her grin just a little wider.
"You know, Kisame said you were a real riot, but I had no idea." He moved closer, his shoes getting covered in the mess, which would definitely stain later. He grabbed her gently, pulling her off, a bit surprised at how easily she followed, instead expecting to meet at least a little resistance. She stood up straight, Pein holding her arm, and looked down at Deidara. She knew what happened next. "Sorry Blondie... for... calling you.. uke.." Pein's eyebrows were already raised, but if they could have gone farther up, they would have. Deidara sat up, looking up at his soiled hair, and then down at his clothes. He'd never be clean after this. Never. Deidara stood up, brushing himself off, though, to no avail. "Apology accepted, now, I'm going to take the world's longest shower, and you are going to stay the fuck away from me. For at least the rest of the day. Someone else is going to have to be her handler, Pein." Pein nodded curtly as Deidara exited, a little bow-legged, visibly disgusted by the whole situation.
Kakuzu gruffed up after looking at the floor Pein had just walked on, throwing a bloodied cloth into the sink, while Hidan sat on the table, arms crossed over his chest. Pein had managed to get a fair amount of the mixture on his shoes, and the bottom of his robe, and had drug it across Kakuzu's work space as he entered, and let's just say that might have not been all that amusing to him. Kakuzu had been careful not to make a mess while he fixed Hidan up, a task that proved difficult to complete with Hidan thrashing about. He'd 'gently' thumped him over the head when he did, and eventually Hidan got the idea that he wasn't supposed to do that.
"What do you want? It better be important, I'm trying to finish up here." Kakuzu said, pulling a thread rather tight, causing Hidan to yelp, and send a pointed glare towards the torturous man. "Deidara is irking his duties as Keiichi's supervisor, so now it's your job." Kakuzu, tugged the final stitch, and Hidan literally hissed at him, and hastily moved out of the room, hoping to avoid getting the duty passed onto himself.
Kakuzu pulled off his bloody gloves, throwing them into the infirmary sink. He'd already cleaned it once today; he didn't want to have to do a full wash down again. "I'm not going to be that twerp's baby-sitter, I already have one on my hands as it is!" Pein's nostrils flared just a tiny bit, but he smiled. "Is that so? Well, then this is your area of expertise. Keiichi is waiting just outside with Sasori, who's only waiting with her to be passed onto you." Kakuzu washed his arms, scrubbing actually, pissed off about this.
Pein smiled cheerfully as he too left the room, calling back, "Have fun!"
Keiichi pouted as she still sat in the filth, next to Sasori who refused to come within four feet of her. "Jeez, do you have a stick up your butt, or something?" Sasori didn't even growl, just stared passively at the wall opposite to the door.
Keiichi curled up into herself, pulling her legs to her chest, and buried her face in her arms. She bit the inside of her cheeks, looking at the wall too. "...It's not fair, y'know?" Sasori glanced to her, waiting for her to continue. "It's not fair. Yeah, life isn't fair, and all that crap, but it's just...it's not okay. I see all those happy people, with family and friends, and nice homes. And me, I can't have a normal family, not for long. I don't even have a home any more. I can't... I.." Keiichi sniffled a bit, wiping at her eyes. "And I freaking can't even make a goddamn friend." Sasori turned to Keiichi, and put a hand on her shoulder. "Friends don't matter, anyways. They're just hindrance to a ninja, Uchiha-san." Keiichi smiled, and Sasori chuckled. "You have that disgusting mess smeared on your face now." She scrunched up her nose, lips curling slightly.
Kakuzu exited the infirmary, snarling, especially at the sniveling girl on the floor. Sasori moved to him, well aware of the moods both the girl and the criminal were in, and leaned up to say something. Sasori was a considerable amount shorter than him, so this proved difficult, however, he still was able to meet the man's ear. "Don't take your anger out on her, she's already vulnerable." Kakuzu raised an eyebrow as Sasori left.
"Get up. We're going to the training field. I have to watch you, but I need to get some time in today." Keiichi stood up, with a fairly red nose, and puffy eyes. She was no longer crying, but you could definitely tell she was recently. He noticed she obviously loved making messes. "You're repulsive. We'll go to the onsen afterwards, and get you cleaned up." Keiichi scowled hearing she have to wait who knows how long until she could get this... concoction of almost nauseating fluids and unknown solids covering her. Kakuzu started walking, and Keiichi begrudgingly followed. This, she was sure, was going to be fun.
Kisame picked up his pack, getting ready to go, handing another to Itachi. "I bet she's waiting for you," he told Itachi, not caring who heard. Itachi nearly snorted. "Yeah, I bet." The owner's son listened as he served a couple of people on the end of the bar closest to the two S-Rank ninjas. "You know, I think this rendezvous was actually rather pleasant this time. It was short, and nobody unexpectedly interrupted." Itachi nodded, putting his bag over his shoulder. "Yes, well, I can't imagine it will be all that pleasant when we get back." Kisame shrugged, fixing Itachi's pack, which refused to move any further up onto his shoulder. "Well, at least there's our room." Itachi softened, and Kisame grinned. The owner's son blushed, almost sure of what would ensue.
Keiichi groaned for the umpteenth time during his sparring session in the field, while he demolished all boulders in his space. Kakuzu stopped, breathing heavily. He walked towards Keiichi, grabbing a towel he'd placed near her earlier. She sat glaring at the floor, still curled up, back against a dirt wall. "We can go now. There's only one, by the way." Keiichi groaned yet again, blushing. She didn't want to see this guy naked. She didn't want him to see her naked. Oh joy.
Kakuzu led her to the onsen, and showed her the shower outside of it, where he instructed her to rinse off first. "You obviously can't go in like that," he'd said. She clenched her teeth under the heavily pressured stream of water. Kakuzu had at some point gotten a hose and started spraying her with it. She spluttered as he aimed it in her face, rendering her unable to breath properly. After Kakuzu cleaned himself as well, they headed inside.
"You can undress in the room to your right, there's an entrance to the onsen in there." She sneered, heading in there. "Don't take too long, or I'll come in after you."
Keiichi started undressing, peeling the soaking wet clothes from her person. She nearly suffocated herself trying to get it over her head though. She heard an almost inaudible whoosh of air as he entered the main area of the onsen, setting his clothes outside the door. Keiichi finished undressing, and grabbed a towel to wrap around herself. There was no point in grabbing her clothes, as she couldn't put them back on anyways.
She entered the onsen, and immediately climbed in the water, as far away from the old man as possible. Really, she had no interest in seeing him naked. Well, maybe a little, but he was like... Old. She still had standards, one of which was that the guy had to be her age, with a maximum of ten years older. What was Kakuzu, like four hundred or something? He still looked kind of good, rugged, but handsome. Old. He was old, she reminded herself, just old.
Keiichi sunk into the water a bit, adjusting her towel. She was thankful she wasn't forced to take it off. In the onsens she'd been to before, most did not allow towels or even wash cloths to go into the water, as it was considered unclean. It's not that she wasn't proud of her body, or uncomfortable with it, but she was ninja, and she honestly didn't like feeling exposed. She heard a small splash and Kakuzu lowered himself. "So what do you do here, aside from train?" Kakuzu shrugged, leaning on the edge of another part of the bath, so Keiichi slunk down a bit. "Not much, now that I think about it."
"Oh," Keiichi eyebrows furrowed, as she quirked her lips. "Well, do you guys have like, team building stuff?" Kakuzu snorted. "No. That crap is bullshit."
"Well, I think you guys should. Like, a game night or something." Kakuzu shook his head, turning back around. "Fuck that. Now, just shut up, you're giving me a headache."
"It really is important. Without team building, teammates will turn on each other."
"I don't fucking know what's in your experience, I really don't, but I don't care either. I told you to shut up, so do it." Keiichi crossed her arms over her chest indignantly, huffing. "...I'm calling you 'Kuzu'." Kakuzu turned back towards her, one eyebrow raised. "Scrap, or waste." As she told him, she wrote the kanjis with her pointer finger midair. Kakuzu growled. She smirked. "Yes, actually, Kuzu-chan." 'Chan', a term so widely known, and can be so endearing, but is not in this case. Referring to someone your own age or older as 'chan' is disrespectful. Which showed that you thought lowly of them. Something basically already said with the nickname 'Kuzu.'
All Kakuzu could really do was grin and bear it. Well, minus the grinning, on his part anyways.
She knew they already didn't like her, but she also knew she'd at least have Sasori and Kisame, and of course, Itachi, her eldest brother. So she went on her merry way, dripping towel clutching her every curve. Kakuzu turned his attention to her, and got out the water. "What you doing?" Keiichi grinned, flashing her teeth. "Taking your clothes. Kthnxbai!" The last part she'd said in English. She'd heard that phrase on the Internet when she'd spent time in the western lands, where technology thrived. She dashed through the locker room, snatching a white robe initialed "K", in dark blue. She then started heading back in the direction they came from. Kakuzu bound out of the water, running after her, a small towel wrapped around his waist.
"Get back here Uchiha!" Keiichi made it to the main hallways of the base, nearly running into Zetsu. She'd consider trying to get him to help, but she wasn't ignorant. Zetsu is a cannibal. Bath time with Kakuzu would be the last time anybody saw her.
Keiichi ran into Itachi's room, locking the door, and hiding behind the blinds in the closet. The door clicked as the lock turned, and she bit her lip. Through the blinds she saw the door was still open, and whoever it was had long hair, and was nor Kakuzu, nor Itachi. Deidara? Deidara turned, softly clicking the door back into place, locking the door as she had done a moment before. The blonde made his way to the drawer, pulling out a magazine, and stood there, flipping through the pages. The room was dimly lit, and Keiichi vaguely wondered how he could see at all, when she could barely make out the lines of his face. She activated her Sharingan, and blushed, seeing him lick his lips, and then partially pull his bottom lip into his mouth with his teeth. She had a good idea of what he might be looking at now. And in her brother's room. Oh good God. It was her brother's. She scrunched up her face, but continued watching because it was about all she could do. If she moved Deidara might hear her, and take action. How, she didn't know, but she figured he would.
Keiichi bit her lip, wincing slightly. She didn't want to watch this. Well, that was a partial lie, seeing as how this guy was pretty attractive. Regardless, he would think of it as an invasion of privacy, even though he probably didn't have permission to be in Itachi's room. She sat down as quietly as she could, getting into a comfortable position. This would be a while. Or not. She had no idea. She didn't think it was appropriate to have any idea, to know how long he'd last. But she was about to find out, wasn't she?
Deidara walked over to flick the lights on, holding the magazine in hand. She could see the back pages of it, and she blushed. It was exactly what she thought it was. She held her nose, feeling a nosebleed coming on. This was her first day awake in a house full of guys, and one girl, and she had already come across one of them doing something like this. She had no idea how much longer she'd have to stay, or how much more of these kinds of things she'd be witnessing, but she knew if she got caught there would be no next time. If Deidara didn't kill her, her brother would. The blonde moved to the bed, and opened the nightstand drawer. Shuffling through it, he searched for what Keiichi assumed was probably some form of lubricant, or tissues.
Keiichi licked her lips, dry from staying still, trying to be quiet. Deidara did the same, face flushed. He seemed almost as embarrassed as Keiichi was, and he didn't even know she was there.
Deidara laid down on the bed, fidgeting with his pants, before sort of giving up, looking at the magazine. Keiichi could only imagine the girls in provocative poses all over the pages. She couldn't help but feel jealous. Who wouldn't? She'd only just met him, sure, but she was offended he didn't find her sexy enough to do… this to.
Deidara dazedly looked the magazine, trailing one hand down to the half-unzipped zipper.
Keiichi felt bad. She shouldn't be watching him. She couldn't watch him, and feel right with herself, no matter how attractive he was, and no matter how much she wanted to.
He fumbled with the zipper, before finally unzipping it all the way, sighing. He set the magazine down, lifting his hips, and pulling his pants down and off his legs. He rolled them up, setting them on the bed next to him, and picked his magazine up again. He swallowed, blush still adorning his cheeks. Hers too.
Keiichi stood up, reaching for the handle of the closet door. She grabbed it, swallowing. She had to. Before he did anything. Didn't she?