I own nothing.

I was shooting the breeze with a fellow Nanoha fan one day and this short idea came up.

No, I'm not giving up on Blood That Flows, but I needed to write something.

Tre narrowed her eyes as she saw who was contacting her. "Colonel Yagami..." She was extremely tempted to turn the contact window off right then and there, but considering that no one had bothered to contact her, Uno or Quattro in some time, other than their sisters once every couple of months, it had to be a special occassion.

The short, brown-haired woman grinned at her. "Hey, hey, don't give me such a scary look, Tre, someone might get the wrong idea."

"Cut the crap, what are you here for?"

Hayate raised an eyebrow, she knew, from what Wendi, Sein, Nove and Dieci had told her, that Tre could be a bit of a grouch, but this seemed to be beyond her expectations. "Well, either you're just pissed at me, you had a bad day or it's that time of the month..." She sighed as Tre practically growled at her, "anyway, I'm here concerning parole."

"Forget it, I'm not going to..."

"Would you let me finish?" Hayate let out an exhasperated breath. "It's not for you, it's for your sister, Sette."

Tre quieted down for a few moments as she thought about that. "...So she finally decided to work with the Bureau?"

Hayate shrugged, "I'm not sure, but I do know is that if she wanted to leave, she could leave at any time, she just needs to ask."

"...I'm not going to like what I hear next, am I?"

Hayate leaned forward, "Sette has requested that you be allowed to go on parole with her before she will consider it."

"And we both know that I can't unless I betray the Doctor, join the Bureau and do community service." Tre twitched as she glared at Hayate. "No way in hell."

"I know, however, I... Do have enough contacts that I could... Broker a deal to let you out."

"What? Be your personal toy, slave, or some other depraved thing?" Tre had heard rumors about Hayate Yagami, most of them weren't exactly good.

"...Something to that effect." Hayate took a deep breath, there was no reason to beat around the bush with this. "My offer would be this, you'd have to feed my pet, his name is Pucca, every day for one month, then once a week after that for at least fifteen years."

"...That's it?" Tre stared, shock on her face. "Feed your pet? What? Can't you throw some dog food at him or something?"

"He's... Rather exotic." Hayate quirked a small smile as she thought about Pucca, exotic was putting it mildly.

"Exotic, how?" The purple haired cyborg had this feeling she wasn't going to like this.

"He's a tentacle monster."

Tre blinked, several times. "...What's a tentacle monster?"

That statement was such a shock to the small woman that she fell out of her seat and landed on her head. "Wh...oww..."

"That looked like it hurt." Tre smirked, grateful to get one over on a Bureau member in some way.

"You mean you don't know what a tentacle monster is or what it does?"

Tre shrugged, "our targets were never animals, only Bureau members, I have zero clue as to what a tentacle monster is. So, let's say, hypothetically, that I do take you up on your offer, how do you feed a tentacle monster?"

"First, you get naked, then you let the tentacle monster do what it wants."

"...Wait, you're saying that I have to get naked so that it can eat me?!"

Hayate face-palmed as Tre was actually looking a little scared. "No... Pucca won't eat you, Pucca feeds off of body fluids and waste." Seeing Tre's confused look, understanding dawned on Hayate. "...Do you even know what sex is or what's involved in it?"

Tre looked away, her face red. "I know that sex is how babies are made, but it wasn't anything I was interested in. Why?"

"...You've never had sex, have you?"

"No! Why?! What are you trying to say?"

"This makes things more interesting." Hayate mumbled, she looked at Tre for a moment before nodding, "very well, Tre, I'm going to explain to you just what it is you're expected to do to feed Pucca."

As Hayate explained and answered questions, Tre's face managed to obtain both a red hue from blushing, she had never had such things explained in detail to her before, and somehow managed to go completely pale as she realized just what Hayate was saying.

"...You want me to have sex with your tentacle pet..."

"It's up to you." Hayate shrugged, "you can decline that, stay in prison or join the Bureau and do community service for years. Personally, I've done both community service and I've fed Pucca for years, if I had the choice, I probably would have taken Pucca over community service."

"I bet you would." Tre rolled her eyes, just about ready to end the conversation.

"Tre..." Hayate's voice became very quiet and serious. "The only reason I'm asking you is because your sisters, Nove, Wendi, Sein, Cinque and Dieci all came up to me and asked me, personally, to find a way to get you out so that Sette could be free. And Sein told me that Otto and Deed want the same thing." Hayate looked at Tre, who was visibly struggling with something. "Even if you don't care about yourself, do you think it's okay if Sette suffers for the rest of her life?"

"...fine..." Tre whispered, annoyance visible on her face. "You set it up, I'll do that feeding or whatever you call it with your pet tentacle monster." Hayate's eyes widened. "But just know this, you better make sure that Sette's well taken care of, or I'll have your head."

Hayate smiled at her. "Don't worry, that won't be a problem. I'll see you shortly, Tre."

As the communication window turned off, Tre leaned back on her bed and sighed. "I'm going to regret this, aren't I?"

Those of you who might be wondering where the next update to Blood That Flows is, well, don't worry, I AM working on it, but life was being a bitch for awhile there, between my brother being hospitalized this summer and the fact that I had to suffer through dry socket lately (look it up, it's PAINFUL), plus some other distractions...