3Title: Broken
Summary: A songfic based upon the song of the same name. Nunnaly, as she faces her brother, and watches him die. Character death and spoilers.
Rating: T
Disclaimer: Not even going to try.
Authour's Note: I was watching Lelouch's death repetitively for one of my other fic, Not Yet, and I suddenly remembered this song. I had decided to post another chapter on my other story but was frustrated with the complete lack of reviews, despite the large amount of people that had been visiting the fic. This is my own attempt at drawing readers, and also, an exercise in helping me understand Nunnaly's feelings towards her brother. If you want, you can read this in parallel with my other story Not yet, because this is essentially Nunnaly's feelings toward her brother at the time of his death.
Wake up to a sunny day, not a cloud up in the sky
Nunnaly smiled up at the brother she couldn't see. Lelouch was her beloved big brother who had helped her through so much.
Then it starts to rain, my defenses hit the ground
Then, she realized she could see. That she was chained to a giant parade float and her brother was above her, with everyone around looking resentful and hateful. Everyone was afraid.
And they shatter all around, so open and exposed
That Lelouch had used his Geass on her, it reminded her of her position as she was now. Her memories of the positive thing were overshadowed by all of the hateful things.
I found strength in the struggle
She had so nearly stopped him. If she had only kept her eyes shut. If she had not yearned to see the face of Lelouch so badly…
Face to face with my trouble
His grim and triumphant smile and he held the key to the FLEIJA in his hand. That he had stolen from her, and would then use to take over the world.
When you're broken in a million little pieces
Her heart burned with the memory of those last words she had said to him. He had completely shattered her world.
And you're trying but you can't hold on anymore
"Big brother, you are the devil! Vile… so devious… How… How could you?!"
Every tear falls down for a reason
She lay helpless face down on the stairs as he walked away. Walked away to kill… to murder millions more people.
Don't you stop believing in yourself
If only she had been stronger. If only he had truly been the brother that she thought he was.
When you're broken
All her tears were gone at this point. She was saving what she could for the execution of all the prisoners she could see in front of her. Dear kind Kallen, the Empress Tian Xi. So much murder and destruction.
Little girl don't be so blue
She had thought it was all for her. That he was destroying the world for her. He had perhaps meant it before, meant for it to create a better world for her.
I know what you're going through
Suzaku had tried to comfort her, before he had changed his mind and gone to do evil with her brother. The people she loved most had betrayed her.
Don't let it beat you up
She was sad, so sad for all the people that had died. Maybe they had felt betrayed as well. She tried so hard not to blame herself, but it was hard.
Hitting walls and getting scars
She had realized then that it wasn't her fault though. It was purely her evil older brother's ego.
Only makes you who you are
She hated more so than her brother though, the bitterness and hatred that consumed her.
Only makes you who you are
She felt that it was making her lose herself, that the hatred and bitterness was becoming her most definite feature, although physically she looked just as soft and kind, if not sadder.
No matter how much your heart is aching
She missed the days when she had been blind, and the world had been kinder. When Lelouch was only her brother and they had already left their past behind them.
There is beauty in the breaking
She had had to grow up now. If she hadn't, the hatred would have broken her. A younger, kinder heart couldn't have stood through all the abuse and pain it was facing, with her chained to a parade float far below her once beloved brother's feet.
Yeah
She suddenly noticed a commotion down far away from where she was. She heard gunshots, and her heart twisted. She couldn't see past the Knightmare frames and guards all around, but she knew someone must have been dying. People were screaming.
When you're broken in a million little pieces
She saw a masked figure with a billowing cloak use a Knightmare as a springboard, and her heart leaped. Perhaps she was being saved.
And you're trying but you can't hold on anymore
She prayed at that moment - however selfish it was- that someone was going to help her, to drag her from this nightmare.
Every tear falls down for a reason
Zero landed right in front of her, and surprised a cry from her mouth as he jumped by.
Don't you stop believing in yourself
He nimbly jumped up the slope to her brother, and she heard her brother exclaim "You cretin!"
When you're broken
A clanging noise signaled that the gun he had been holding was knocked out of his hand.
Better days are gonna find you once again
Nunnaly allowed herself to hope, to hope that perhaps this would end it all, that her brother would pay for the sins of murdering so many people.
Every piece will find its place
She watched stoically as Zero raised his sword, and Lelouch's face somehow grew calm.
When you're broken, when you're broken
Her heart stopped twisting. Here it was, the peace that the world had yearned for. Everything, everyone would be better off with her brother dead.
When you're broken in a million little pieces
It seemed nearly to be in slow motion when Zero pulled back the sword, and prepared to thrust it into her brother.
And you're trying but you can't hold on anymore
It was then that she realized that no matter what, he had still been her brother, and that she had so many good memories of him, despite the fact that he was such an evil person now. She felt like ice as the sword found its mark and went through her brother's body.
Every tear falls down for a reason
He seemed suspended there for a moment, and what looked like a weak attempt at a slap touched Zero's mask. He staggered back as the sword was pulled quickly and efficiently from his gut.
Don't you stop believing in yourself
He fell to his knees, somehow serenity on his face, along with the unimaginable pain. It was almost comical how he rolled down the slope, and landed beside her. There was trail of blood down to her, and blood was pooling already under him. He was going pale, and she could tell he had already lost a lot of blood, if the stains on his clothes were anything to judge by.
When you're broken
"Brother?" she asked, almost disbelievingly, her icy body regaining some movement and feeling. She reached out and grabbed his hand. Almost immediately she felt a surge of images and emotions flood into her mind. She saw Lelouch hand the Zero mask to Suzaku, and she understood. "It can't be…" She said, pain creeping into her voice. "Brother… you were… all along…"
Oh, when you're broken
Pain flooded her. All her hatred disappeared, and she felt only regret and pain. "Brother, I love you!" she cried out, already knowing it was too late.
"Yes… I… destroy… worlds, … … … I… create… worlds." His eyes closed slowly as his voice faded, and she watched him go limp. Tears were running down her cheeks, and she didn't know when she had started crying.
"Brother!" she cried desperately. "No! Open your eyes!" Her voice cracked as it shot through several octaves. "Brother!" She couldn't believe what was happening. "BROTHER!"
When you're broken
Her brother was still the same, except he had done it not only for her, but for the entire world.
"This is unfair." She sobbed. She could hardly see for all of the tears clouding her vision. "I would have been happy just being with you, big brother." Her tears had gone, and all she could do was to grasp to her dead brother's body. "I couldn't' bear a future without you, brother..." Her voice somehow went even higher. "I just can't…" And then all she could do was lean over, and put her face to her brother as the chants that cheered Zero resounded.
When you're broken
Her anguished cries rang out as she thought 'it isn't Zero they should be chanting for, it's Lelouch.' He had done this for all of them, and none of them would appreciate it. He was dead, and right up until his final moments, she had hated him too.
A/N: I didn't want to destroy the incredible feeling this fanfic left me with, but I figured I needed to give some information. The song is by Lindsay Haun, and is called Broken. I have wanted to write a songfic for the longest time. Please, PLEASE read my other fic, Not Yet if you like this one. I want reviews! The next chapter for that is already halfway done, but I have lost motivation. Also, REVIEW! I crave the satisfaction of getting a review in my inbox.