2Absolute
My name is Raven.
I am half-good, half-evil.
In my world, there are only two sides.
Win Lose
Black White
Day Night
I am the sides together
Like Yin and Yang
But not like them at all
Because they had balance
I envy them that
Or I would
If I was able to feel envy
Correction again:
I can feel
But I won't show it
Because then I would destroy
The whole world
My life is a well-wrapped lie
It took years for the corners to poke out
16 on the dot
Before it exploded
Fate makes things explode for me
My anger, my pain,
My lie of a life.
I am a superhero
Meant to save
Protect, help, be the light
I am irony's favorite toy
It seems.
I am only half-light
And some days
When the world is
Red and twisted black,
I doubt even that much.
Since I appeared,
They knew I would destroy them,
Allow him to destroy them.
I am the ultimate secret weapon.
But the secret part is my fault.
If I had accepted it,
That I am the portal for Death,
Destruction,
The End of all things,
Would the world
Have been better off?
Even my friends call me "goth" sometimes
Because I am always dark.
I am not white or black, but gray.
Not black or white, but midnight-blue.
Not red hair
Not blue hair
Purple.
I am every in-between in one.
But I have no balance.
Even with all those things, watch:
I envelop things in blackness,
And I do so for good,
But only for now,
When my mind is clear.
I meditate, I chant,
And all the A-M-Zs in time
Will not save us, or me
I keep a poker face
For 16 years
Never laughing
And never screaming
Afraid of my lie falling apart
From the sheer power.
At home, we accepted
That Dark would eventually
Win over Light.
Here, on Earth, they say
That the good guys win.
Whose rule will apply
When Azarath comes
To crush Earth?
When I awaken
To the destiny
I always knew
Would come?
I fought like hell
To escape the doom
Of 16 years old.
I would not die
And once, I even prayed
To a God I had never
Believed in before
To save me from fate.
Fate or God – who wins?
16 is not sweet.
It is the battle
Finally brought
After horrible tension.
I am a reader. I calm myself
With books where the
Magic is pure and
The hero is always
Always the winner.
I never read books
Where the hero fights
Against himself
Because inside I am too
Afraid he will lose
Like me.
I sound like I have
Accepted my fate.
I can never truly do it.
I will never give in,
Even when I am consumed
And the world is turned
To fire and brimstone.
I read the oldest story I saw
On the shelf of the first
Library around on Earth.
It was a Greek tragedy:
Oedipus Rex.
I don't feel much
But I felt for Oedipus.
Our fates are similar in the truest senses.
My mother is good, and
She may already be dead.
My father is evil itself,
And our union will
Be stained with blood.
Still, Oedipus resisted fate,
Even when all was already lost to him.
He became blind and poor
And he died alone.
Not inspiring at all.
Except for the part before he lost everything
And is still fighting.
I have been fighting all my life.
Power is a kind of armor
That never comes off
Or truly goes away.
Like Beast Boy's green skin
And unstable DNA
I am the most powerful thing around.
I know it, and I am
Not arrogant, but
Ashamed
Of how Trigon will use my power,
And of how I will let him.
I hold in 80% or more of my power
Because it is unstable, dangerous
Because I lack complete balance.
I always have.
But I cannot say that
I always will.
As I am now,
The poker-faced goth,
I will never defeat Trigon.
The only way to beat fate
With free will for me
Is to free myself
Holding nothing back
Letting my heart even out alone
Then I can use all my armor
My white, pure, armor
With no color bleeding through
And perhaps, since
I am on Earth
And because I will fight
Evil Incarnate
– Trigon –
And because there are only
Two sides in my world
The winners and the losers
The good guys and the villains
White and black
Perhaps I can be
More than half-good, half-evil.
No.
No perhaps.
I can be.
There are only two sides.
My foe is evil.
So I?
I am absolute good.