Finally a story that was written this year. And not from three years ago like the other two. It should be much better, but I apologize if it's not. I actually have an editor now. :D So I dedicate this first chapter to her. Thanks for editing this, Rome! Speaking of editing, my little sister (she's 11 going on 12) was reading the first few paragraphs over my shoulder. She pointed out about five mistakes that I made. That made me feel really good about myself. -.- So enjoy my first Death Note fanfic!
I do not own Death Note...DAMN!

It was morning in the Kira Investigation headquarters.

"Ryuzaki," I said, looking to the other man strangely, just as I did every other morning upon the unfortunate event of our being chained together.

"Yes, Light-kun," he deadpanned, not even lifting his gaze to meet mine.

"What the hell are you doing," I inquired. Though to onlookers it may have sounded like a heavily irked demand. I wonder how many times he can do this before he either becomes normal or I have to accept this as such. I know there's no point in keeping track. Neither one of us would be willing to give an inch. He's just crazy. And I'm just….stubborn.

"What do you mean?" A mildly confused look plastered his face. Sometimes I wondered if he did this simply because he knew that it got on my nerves.

I sighed. This is the most normal thing in the world for him. "Let me rephrase. What the hell are you making?" This was a typical conversation for us to have in the morning- and it happened nearly every morning. Couldn't he humor me once and just eat plain, non-sugar covered fruit? It was no secret that I longed for the day he would act like a normal member of society. Some of his actions grated on my every nerve. But as much as I wanted that to happen, I would be waiting for a very long time.

"Breakfast," he replied casually. He still wouldn't spare a glance in my direction.

"I don't think that qualifies as breakfast." Or anything for that matter. It should be illegal to consume sweets before a certain time of day. That would save a small portion of my sanity. A small voice in my head told me, he'd just do something else to bother you. I may actually be lucky that he isn't doing something far worse.

"How is cheesecake, three scoops of vanilla ice cream, sugar coated strawberries, and sprinkles not breakfast?" For a genius, he wasn't very practical. But what else is new?

My eye twitched. He had to be joking. But it was common knowledge that he did not make jokes. What he was eating sounded so ridiculous. Never in my seventeen years of life had I seen a human consume as much sugar as I saw this guy put down in a single week. "It doesn't meet the standards of what ninety nine percent of the world considers to be breakfast; children not included," I stated matter of factly. This kitchen, with almost every appliance known to man, some things even I had no name for, had never been used for anything close to legitimate cooking. Why do we even own these things if they were destined for stagnancy? What a waste…

"Then how come I am still healthy and alive?" he jeered.

I crossed my arms. That's what I'm wondering. It's just not admissible. "You're a special case," I reasoned. "And calling you healthy would be a bit of a stretch."

"Why so concerned with what I eat now? You never have been before. Or is it just that you want some?"

"I've always wondered why you eat this way. I'm just too nice to say anything." L rolled his eyes at this. "And no, I do not want any," I added, leaving no room for confusion. "I would probably get an ulcer just for ingesting it."

"You don't consume enough sugar. How do you make it through the day? Surely the human body needs more than the amount of sugar you consume to survive?"

"A normal person doesn't need that much sugar. I thought that you, of all people, should know that what you do is not considered normal. And while we're on the topic of what is and isn't normal, you don't get enough sleep. The time you spend actually sleeping is far less than you should be getting," I admonished.

He went over and sat at the table. I, being chained to him, had to follow. He then assumed his usual strange sitting position. "I've gotten more since being chained to you. But I don't see what you need so much sleep for. It's just wasted time. I could solve an entire case in the time I should be sleeping."

I crossed my arms. "The amount of sleep you get is inhuman and unhealthy. It's a wonder that you aren't falling off your chair from exhaustion right now. You got, what, seven and a half minutes of sleep last night?"

It's true though, being chained together forced him to sleep. Or at least into the bed, which at that point made it seem foolish not to sleep. And on rare occasions that I woke up in the middle of the night, I actually saw him sleeping. Not many people can say that they'd seen that.

"Around that amount. I didn't expect you to be keeping track. But I'll have you know that I get through the day just fine," he pointed out.

"Until your brain gives out from all the heavy thinking and the inability to withstand any more sugar buzzes." It truly isn't the best of combinations. He honestly can't have much longer at this rate.

"But until then, I'm getting by," he retorted while loading up his spoon with cheesecake and ice cream before proceeding to shove it all in his mouth.

He could at least eat with some sort of class. I hope he gets a brain freeze. If this guy wasn't 'L', there was no way he could live the life style that he does. And it makes me wonder if he wasn't L, could he even possibly live like a normal person? Would his personality even allow that? Somehow I doubt he could take care of himself. And he probably couldn't get himself a girlfriend to help him in that area. He's destined to live a life of solitude forever. Oh well. It has to happen to someone. Does he even consider what he's missing? There's got to be a lot of stuff he doesn't get to do because he's L. I doubt he even cares much though. And it's not on my to-do list to find out if he fills the void, or used to, by masturbating. I shuttered. Definitely not.

"You should seriously consider getting a girlfriend or something," I half joked. I'd be pretty willing to give him Misa if he asked.

"Getting and maintaining a relationship would most likely involve revealing my face. It doesn't really work otherwise. And knowing you, I'd probably be set up and killed."

My eye twitched. "For the last time, I don't want you dead," I said stiffly. For the most part...

"And besides, when and how would I find the time to date?" He raised his hand in reminder of the metal restraints.

"I don't know. But you could loosen up a bit. Call for a massage or something. It might improve your posture." Now I was just making fun of him, but it wasn't completely uncalled for.

"Again, that person would see my face. Weren't you listening at all, Light-kun? If you were to offer though, I wouldn't oppose," he stated, chewing on his thumb nail.

I guess I set myself up for that one. "Uh, no thanks. I would rather keep my hands to myself."

"Yes, you are probably used to getting the massage anyway. From Miss Amane I mean."

Ugh, that woman… countless times she has tried to give me a massage. Very, very few has she succeeded.

I glowered at him. "It's been quite some time since then though." And I don't miss it one bit. She gets off on getting to put her hands all over me. Like she's marking her territory. In no way, shape, or form would I ever let her own me.

He rolled his eyes. "Maybe you should be calling for a massage. You seem rather grumpy today."

"Is that supposed to be some sort of a joke? 'Cause if it is, it's not funny. I've got enough women after me. It gets really tiresome when they don't leave you alone, but I guess you wouldn't know much about that, would you?" I don't think anyone could relate with the amount of women I refer to.

"In theory I know a fair bit about women. But when it comes to practice, I've had near none."

Any other answer would have shocked me. "Well it's not the same in practice as in theory. If most books were written on experience, they would be unorthodoxly different. Women are portrayed much differently in books than they are in real life. If you were thrown into high school for example, at the end of the week you'd learn more about people than you could from any book. It might possibly cost you your sanity though, but that's just life."

"Is high school really that strenuous? I thought that it was described as the best years of one's life. It can't be all that different."

"Well it would be different for you and me. I grew up, going from grade to grade. As each grade passed, the drama steadily increased. Even so, it's still enough to scare some people. But some actually go out of their way to avoid drama. That's not the most effective way to deal with it," I explained. "You on the other hand, as far as I know, did not go to a public school. And frankly, I don't know what your reaction would be if you were just "put in". With all the drugs, alcohol, fights, and annoying girls vying for your attention...who knows? So I guess you could call it the best years of someone's life. It just depends on who you are and where you stand on the social pyramid." I never realized until having to explain it, how cruel high school can really be. I shuttered at the memory of some of the things I had witnessed growing up.

By the end of my explanation, Ryuzaki had finished his so called breakfast. What an enlightening story time this must have been.

"Hmm, that is interesting. I will have to look more into it. Shall we be getting to work now, Light-kun?" He rose from his seat.

Oh, yeah, work... "That's probably a good idea." I followed suit.

We got ready for the day ahead of us then went to join the others in the work room.

I lounged back in my chair and sighed. You can only stare at a computer screen for so long. Especially when there is nothing new to stare at.

I glanced over at Ryuzaki. He was avidly typing away on the keyboard in front of him. "So what are you doing?" I asked him.

"I am registering," he deadpanned, eyes not leaving the screen.

I raised my eyebrow. "For what?"

"High school. Your story has sparked my curiosity. I'm going to see for myself what it's really like."

Oh, please have mercy! "Wait, seriously? Wh-which school?" I don't even know why I bothered asking when I already knew the answer.

"Yours of course; starting tomorrow I'm going to be a new student," he said nonchalantly, his eyes still not venturing from the screen.

You've gotta be kidding me. School is the only place I get to be away from him. And now he's taking that away. He'll be watching me 24/7. My eye was twitching like crazy. There is no way….

"But aren't you like...twenty something years old?"

"I've forged my records. It wasn't at all that hard. I'm not going into this unprepared."

I was speechless. And just given another reason to hate Mondays. I took a sip of coffee, to hopefully calm my nerves. The affect couldn't have been more opposite. As it went down, a sudden shock overwhelmed me. The coffee shot back up and out of my mouth. And I choked. Hard.

The task force turned to stare at me. I wonder how many of them were actually concerned rather than looking for a show.

"Light-kun, are you ok?" L actually sounded a little concerned.

"Ryuzaki. Please tell me we won't have to wear this." I held up my wrist and jabbed a finger at the offending chain.

"I am still not sure of that little detail."

"Oh, come on! I'm at school every day and nothing goes wrong. Now you'll be there. Isn't that enough?"

He pondered this for a moment then sighed. "I suppose so."

Thank you!

"Why, does Light-kun not want to be chained to me?"

"Certainly not! Do you know what people will think? They'll think we're some sort of kinky gay couple! And I, my friend, refuse to be thought of in that way! Do you know what that would do to my reputation? Nothing good could possibly come of it." When I was done with my rant, I was panting. I've never been so out of breath. Did I even remember to breath? There was no way in hell that I would go to school chained at the wrist to him. Wasn't going to happen. End of story.

"Light-kun, you acknowledged our friendship." He looked up at me.

"What?" That is what he got from me?

"You called me your friend," he repeated.

"Yes I did. So?" I decided not to fight it. It was useless. It's a stretch, but in light of the circumstances I guess we could be called friends.

"A new bond has been created," he mused.

I sighed. "Please don't say it like that."

"Why not, Light-kun?"

He really is a social reject. "Because, when you say it like that it sounds like we're getting married."

"My apologies, Light-kun." He glanced at the computer screen.

"Okay, so we are not being chained together." More a statement than a question, but I got my point across.

"That is correct. Though," he started, "I will make sure that we have all the same classes."

"I suspected as much. And it is the lesser of the two evils." Not by much, but I'll take it.

"I suppose." He directed the majority of his attention back to the screen in front of him.

"Trust me. You don't want to come into school handcuffed to another guy." I don't know anyone who willingly would unless it were a joke. And as I was aware, Ryuzaki did not do jokes.

"Whatever you say, Light-kun. I still don't really get it though," he said, his eyes not diverting from the screen.

That is the difference between you and me. "You really are socially retarded, you know."

The only response he gave was the rolling of his eyes.

:D YEY! First chapter! This is the chapter that I want people to review most. Well, and the last one. I want to hear what you have to say. Even if your opinion sucks. Just keep around for the next chapter. It can only get better.