Disclaimer: Why would I be writing a spoof on Twilight if it belonged to me, Obviously that means it's Stephanie Meyer's, here is my What's Wrong With Twilight.

Human girl falls in love with Vampire... were have I heard that before... Oh yeah, Vampire Diaries, and Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

Obviously this means that Stephanie Meyer is not very original.

She placed herself in the story. Bella Swan.

She even made herself a Mary-Sue. Breaking Dawn.

She made her vampires, sparkle for God's Sake.

She decided to make her story so overly happy it made me physically ill to my stomach.

Her best characters in the entire story were 1. Evil stick figures (Felix) 2. Psychotic blood crazed sparkle-pyres (Jasper) 3. Little Freak-Out Girls with personality disorders (Alice)

This Story promotes Zoophilia/Beastiality. (Jacob and the Wolf Pack + the Imprintees)

Massively has issues with Pedophilia. (Edward + Bella, Jacob + Renesmee, Carlisle + Esme, Jasper + Alice) Need I go on?

This story also promotes Necrophilia. (All of the Vampires are technically dead, In Breaking Dawn, Bella has Sex with Edward while Human. Human + Dead = Necrophilia.

I do not want any flames with this story, simply because my summary told people, that this is not a happy fluffy Twilight-Fic.