The Gold Standard

Sometimes we forget who we are when we're supposed to be someone else. Sometimes we forget what we want when we're supposed to want someone else. Sometimes we forget who we love when we're supposed to love someone else; love someone else; someone else.

Sometimes I wanna quit this song and become an accountant now
But I'm no good at math and besides the dollar is down
Plant palm trees on Lake Michigan before it gets cold
I gotta feel the wind chill again before I get old

I lay on my bed, thinking about my life. What did I really want with my life? I know I'm supposed to be a guardian and whatnot, but is that really how I wanted to live my life? Protect Moroi until I die by strigoi or old age? Whichever came first? Grow to love a Moroi, have kids with her and continue my race's existence? If that was the real purpose of life, life was pretty screwed up.

Then there's rose. Sigh. My Roza. Where does she come in with all this? How could I love a Moroi the way I love her. It'll be a huge lie to the poor Moroi. Could I go on deceiving myself until it becomes the truth? I learnt when I was younger that if you repeat something too many times, it doesn't mean anything anymore. Yet, everytime I say I love Roza, it never gets old. In fact, it gets a lot stronger. My love for her was like a cup overflowing, unceasing.

I wanna scream I love you from the top of my lungs
But I'm afraid that someone else will hear me
You can only blame your problems on my world for so long
Before it all becomes the same old song
As soon as we hit the hospital, I know we're gonna leave this town
And get new passports and get get get get get out now

I wanted her to be mine forever. I wanted her to be the one lay down with and wake up to. I wanted her to be the one who would be there through my sadness and joys. I wanted her to be with me when I collapsed and when I rose up. I wanted to tie myself with her in every possible way. And when I die, I wanted her to be with me. I love her. There's no denying. I love her, and I will love her until I die, and if there is life after that, I'll love her then.

All the yes men said no comment
My mouth got going wrong way and all the calls started to roll in
The time my dad caught me a horse shoe crab
And I asked him if throwing it back into the sea would bring our luck back

I wanna scream I love you from the top of my lungs
But I'm afraid that someone else will hear me
You can only blame your problems on my world for so long
Before it all becomes the same old song
As soon as we hit the hospital, I know we're gonna leave this town
And get new passports get out now

I want to shout my love to her from the top of the world, making sure that everyone will know. I want to be able to give her everything she wants and the only tears she'll cry for me is of joy. I want to be able to protect her from everything else in this world. Strigoi, people… Adrian. Don't get me wrong, Adrian is a nice guy once you get over the bad reputation, but he was after my girl. My girl. My Roza.

Tell that boy I leave you alone
Like a stove, I turn my love
The Supra and the Prophit are both in the business of souls

But my life destroyed everything I wanted, and replaced it with everything THEY wanted. So maybe it's time to choose. Will I let go of all I've worked for in the last few years of my life, with blood, pain and tears, for my love? How do I let go? What if I destroy any chance my Roza has of attaining her dreams? Will I be selfish to ask her to come away from this world with me? Will she say yes? What about Vasilissa? Maybe I should leave... it'll be better for everyone, except me. Maybe I need to sacrifice this for Rose. I need to. For rose. Roza. I hope she will move on with her life. With his resolve set, Dimitri fell asleep dreaming about rose and what could happen. The next morning, he would move off to become Tasha's guardian, but never once will he ever put Tasha over rose, never once will her stop caring about rose, never once will he forget Roza...

I wanna scream I love you from the top of my lungs
But I'm afraid that someone else will hear me
Woah I wanna scream I love you from the top of my lungs
But I'm afraid that someone else will hear me
You can only blame your problems on my world for so long
Before it all becomes the same old song
As soon as we hit the hospital, I know we're gonna leave this town
(I know we're gonna leave this town)
And get new passports and get get get get get out now
Get get get get get out now

Goodnight my love… don't forget me. When sorry isn't enough, know you'll always be enough for me…