One of two one shots that I've written. Hopefully to give a little insight into what's been going on with me.
This first one's about Tawni. It's very angst. Just a warning.
"I'm a Barbie girl, in a Barbie world. Life's plastic, it's fantastic" Barbie Girl ~ Aqua
She doesn't envy her boyfriend.
((in fact she hates him))
She doesn't envy her humour,
((she's just as funny))
Or her fame.
((she's got more))
But she does want her happiness.
((because she cries herself to sleep))
She's not perfect,
((no one is: she knows that))
But everyone expects her to be.
((and she can't please everyone))
She stands in front of the mirror.
((all she sees are the flaws))
She wants to cry.
((instead she calls the surgeon's))
Her best friend, her cast mates, they all try to talk her out of it.
((but she's too stubborn))
They tell her she's beautiful.
((she doesn't believe them))
.L.I.E.S. .L.I.E.S. .L.I.E.S.
"Look at that nose," the voice in her head sneers.
((she hates that voice))
The operation goes well.
((and for a while the voice disappears))
And she's almost happy.
((but nothing good ever lasts for forever))
One magazine article later, and her reflection has gained 100 pounds.
((she's fat))
She stops eating,
((literally))
And calls the surgeon.
((one liposuction coming up))
Again they try to talk her out of it.
((they love her the way she is))
They try to make her see sense.
((she's not fat, she's skinny, too skinny))
But she doesn't hear them.
((only the voice))
.L.I.E.S. .L.I.E.S. .L.I.E.S.
One year later,
((she's about to have her eighth operation))
She's unrecognisable.
((she's a Barbie doll))
She's never happy anymore.
((happiness? What's that?))
She looks like she's about to break.
((she's already broken))
She's pushed away all her friends.
(("they're out to get you," the voice told her))
Even her best friend has given up.
((she never meant to make Hollywood's sunshine cry))
The magazines don't call her ugly anymore.
((just an ice queen))
.L.I.E.S. .L.I.E.S. .L.I.E.S.
She stands in front of the mirror.
((she hates it, she hates the voice, she hates herself))
With all the energy she can muster,
((which isn't a lot, she hasn't eaten in a week))
She hurls a makeup compact at her reflection.
((she doesn't flinch when the compact collides with the glass))
It gives her a grim satisfaction.
((she laughs as she watches it disintegrate))
She smiles as the pieces fly through the air.
((like rain falling from the sky))
Bad luck doesn't even scare her.
((she's had her fair share of that))
She thinks she looks more beautiful in the fragments.
((they glitter from the ground))
She begins to clear them up.
((with her bare hands))
The edges rip at her skin,
((they pierce her fingers))
But she doesn't notice.
((she feels no more pain))
After all:
((plastic doesn't bleed))
"But it doesn't matter, because I'm packing plastic, and that's what makes my life so f*cking fantastic." The Fear ~Lily Allen.
Review? Tell me what you think.