My fanfictions have been sleeping for years.
When I began my new job seven years ago, I went from part-time to full-time. That resulted in a huge chunk of my time being eaten away. I couldn't give these fanfics proper focus anymore. What I had intended to be a small break turned into me disappearing off the face of Earth.
I became one of those authors who broke their promise to not kill off their stories. I am one of those people who plan too many projects and leave most of them unfinished. That really troubles me.
Being an adult of thirty-years-old now, stress has been as unforgiving as time. The past three years I have faced medical issues (including surgeries and treatment), depression (life-long honestly), and just last year, the loss of my wonderful mother, who deserved more than she ever received. Her passing hit me hard, especially since it wasn't expected. I lost interest in my hobbies and passions. I just didn't care anymore.
In recent months I've been feeling motivated to entertain hobbies and passions again, and I've been giving these fanfics a side eye. Despite the age of these fanfics, I'm surprised to still receive emails and reviews on them. I thank you all for them.
Over the years, I realized my true passion is art, especially character concepts and drawing. Writing will always be secondary (although, poetry is a close first), hence why fanfic writing got thrown to the back of my to-do list. Without art, I feel like I can't breathe.
I can't promise that I'll full on get back to continuing these fanfics, but I have begun to look them over to see where I left off, to see what I want to do with them.
Brushing Fire on the 209th Day – This fanfic will have to wait a longer, especially since it's a massive undertaking compared to Crippled Clock Work (a Star Ocean Fanfic). There's so many things that need to be reworked.
Crippled Clock Work – This fanfic will be easier to tackle, especially since I already know how I would like the story to end. The path is clear here.
Both fics – If I do return to finish these fanfics, one thing will have to change: the format. Many of my readers struggled to read due to the poetic format of these fanfics. I apologize for that. This website doesn't allow for the formatting I had intended for these stories. I feel like the formatting was pulling the fanfics down rather than helping them. Even though I prefer to write poetry than general prose, I think the change will be necessary (this is a huge gripe I have with this website, but I must work within its limitations).
Other than that, I'm sure some of you have left fanfiction altogether, while some of you have stuck around and moved onto other stories. I still enjoy reading fanfics, a guilty pleasure at this point. I have been writing poetry and drawing a LOT during the free time I do have.
In all, thank you to those who supported my fanfics. They will remain sleeping until I can kiss them awake. I have to reacquaint myself with them.
Stay well, be happy, and don't let anything get in the way of pursuing what you enjoy.
- Carolina a.k.a EggPan