40I do not own Clockwork Angel by Cassandra Clare
Jem had passed out almost as soon as his head had hit the pillow. I took a little longer to fall asleep. I was flat on my back, staring at the ceiling when Jem rolled over in his sleep. His arm rested against mine, and his touch was electric. I tensed, thinking I would never be able to get to sleep now. However, as the minutes passed, I found myself feeling comfortable and safe with Jem at my side. Feeling… whole for the first time in a while, I let myself drift into an uneasy sleep.
Jem's movement in the bed woke me. I opened my eyes, and saw him sitting up in bed, clutching his knees up to his chest.
'Oh. You're awake.' he said, turning to look at me
I rubbed my eyes and, without sitting up, looked out the window – it was morning.
'Look,' said Jem. 'I'm just going to do this, and-'
The next thing I felt was Jem's lips on mine. I was in shock, and for a second I couldn't move. Then, without thinking, without even planning it, I responded to his kiss. I had never kissed anyone like this, but somehow my lips knew what to do. It felt like there was no one in the world besides us.
All of a sudden, the intoxicating fire caused by the kiss stopped – Jem had pulled away. I kept my eyes closed, putting my hand to my lips, not wanting to lose the memory. Unexpectedly, a flash or anger coursed through me.
'Why the hell did you stop?' I snapped, opening my eyes. I was still lying on the bed, flat on my back. Jem was kneeling on the bed, one leg either side of me.
The glimmer of hope that sprung to Jem's eyes at these words was dashed almost immediately by a look of anguish, as though he had mentally slapped himself. I knew the feeling. 'I'm sorry,' he said, looking horrified. 'I shouldn't have done that.'
I sat up and grabbed his arm. 'Jem – that, what just happened - did you mean it?'
He wouldn't meet my eyes. 'Yes.'
'Good, because I meant it too.' Jem looked up tentatively, and our eyes locked. Instinctively, I leaned forward and kissed him. It was more tender and slow than before, less fast and frenzied. The kiss could have lasted ten seconds, but it felt more like several hours. Finally, I sucked Jem's lower lip one last time and pecked him tenderly on the lips. I sat back on my heels and stared at him. Never in a million years would I have thought that Jem returned my feelings.
Jem flopped back down onto his pillow. 'Will, who are we kidding? We can't do this. I mean, it's illegal, isn't it?'
'I'm pretty sure taking drugs is illegal, too.' I pointed out. The words were hardly out of my mouth when I heard a knock at the door.
Jem started, then whispered 'Hide!'
I made for the wardrobe and shut the door behind me. I heard Jem open the door and greet Sophie, saying he'd be down for breakfast soon. He closed the door. I climbed out of the wardrobe sheepishly.
'You'd better get back to your room.' Jem said quietly, not meeting my eyes. I didn't need telling twice. Just before I opened the door, I stopped and turned around. 'Jem, I -' I hesitated. What was there to say?
'Just go Will.' I could tell he wanted to be alone. I left.
Thankfully, I met no one on the way back to my room. I stripped off Jem's pajamas and dressed quickly. Jem was so… hard to read sometimes. One minute he'd be an open book, the next, he'd retreat so far inside himself I couldn't reach him. I had no idea what to think now. I practically ran downstairs – half of me wanting to see Jem, the other half scared he'd still be closed off, impassive. I couldn't reach him then.
At breakfast, Jem smiled at me, like we were sharing a private joke – I guess we were, really. I was relieved and ecstatic that his walls were down again. I barely listened to any of the chatter around the table, until Charlotte called my name sharply.
'What?' I asked, pulling myself out of my reverie.
Charlotte looked irritated. 'I was just saying, since Jessamine and I are going shopping after breakfast, you and Jem can have the morning off studying.'
'Sounds good, thanks.' I went back to my breakfast, but not before I kicked Jem under the table. He blushed.
I followed Jem up to his room after breakfast.
'Look,' he said when I closed the door. 'I'm sorry about before-'
'No, I'm sorry, look if you don't want to do this, that's fine – well it's not fine, but-'
Jem had walked over and pressed a finger to my lips, silencing me. I melted at his touch. His eyes were such a mesmerising silver…
And then he was kissing me again. I'd reached him – we were seeing eye to eye. All my doubts faded away as I got caught up in devouring Jem – all of him. We were matching each other, making it hotter, faster than ever. Jem pressed me up against the wall and planted kisses on my neck, nibbled my ear. I moaned. He had me now; he'd knocked that last wall down and kicked it aside. There was no point trying to fight it, not when this felt so right.
Author's note time!
Firstly, thank you so much to Red-Cherry-Flowers and AuroralMemory for reviewing Chapter One! Your positive and helpful responses are helped me get this chapter finished quickly. And to anonymous reviewer Naty, I included the music because I think it's cool when fanfiction and published authors have playlists to go with stories and share what music inspired them. And on that note, here is the music for Chapter 2 – It's a little more varied than Chapter 1!
The two biggest songs for this chapter were Short Stack's 'Planets' watch?v=Pckfw_8cEc4 and Miranda Cosgrove's 'Kissin U' watch?v=FgUR6qDZCvE&ob=av2n Also (I listened to these probably about once each) the rest of Short Stack's songs, and most of Justin Bieber's songs. Yes, him again. And I really don't care if you don't like him, or the other artists I've listed here.
A note on how Will may seem out of character:
For one thing, this fic is in first person, Will's point of view, and Clockwork Angel is in third person, mostly Tessa's point of view. In writing this, I'm trying to get inside Will's head, and show a side of him we didn't really see all that much of in Clockwork Angel.
Let me know if you liked this chapter! Or if you didn't like it, whatever, just make it constructive criticism and not pointless flames. I think at this point the story has one or two chapters to go – let me know if you have a particular direction you'd like this story to take… you never know, it could inspire me to write a longer fic!