Disclaimer: Rogue238 does not own the X-Men or any other Marvel characters or Twinkies. She only borrows them for her twisted plot lines.

A/N: This story is a one-shot outtake of my story, 777 A Split in Reality. It takes place shortly after Sabretooth's trial and Sabretooth's Revenge: Acolyte's Terror. If you haven't read those stories, go do so now, and review them. . . hee hee.

And now without further ado. . .


Sabretooth's Revenge: Logan's Fright

Logan sits outside the mansion when he smells a familiar smell. "Sabretooth," he growls. He jumps to his feet. The last time Sabretooth started hanging around the mansion, Logan had been captured by Trask and used to test the sentinels. This doesn't bode well in Logan's mind. He gets up and sneaks out the gates.

Instead of Sabretooth, he finds a box. He sniffs the box. It smells strongly of Sabretooth and paper. He opens it. Inside is a note. He sniffs the note. It smells like paper and crayons. So he opens it and looks it over. It has a bad drawing of a dead wolverine. The note says to meet him by the beach at midnight.

Logan shrugs and goes back into the mansion. He looks at his watch, it's only ten. He heads to Xavier's office. "Don't you ever go to sleep, Chuck?"

Xavier sighs. "I am afraid I am still worried about Anna, I mean, Rogue."

"You ain't gonna help her by getting no rest," Logan states.

"Perhaps, you're right," Xavier says, wheeling from behind his desk. "Something else on your mind, Logan?"

"I'm going out for a bit," he says. "I should be back before dawn."

Xavier nods his head and heads to his room to go to bed.

Logan heads to the rec room, hoping to find it empty. Instead, he finds Storm and Mystique watching a girly chick flick and gorging on popcorn.

"Oh, he didn't!" Storm exclaims.

"He so did!" Mystique says. "I can't believe it!"

"How could he do that?"

"I don't know, but it would be just like Erik to do that to me," Mystique grumbles.

"Men!" Storm exclaims with a shake of her white hair.

"He should have said," Mystique says, quickly shifting into the leading man, "Marian, I've been waiting my whole life for someone like you. I could never love anyone else."

Ororo starts to giggle. Mystique shifts back to her true form and starts giggling too.

Logan backs slowly out. He figures there is way too much estrogen in there. He isn't too happy about Storm's new best friend, either. He decides to sneak into the cleaning closet and grab the polish. He doesn't want anyone to know he polishes his claws. He knows it doesn't help the metal much, but he likes the way the polish makes the claws ease in and out. He spends the rest of his waiting time polishing his claws. He puts the polish back and goes out to get his bike.

Directly at midnight, he reaches the beach. The whole place smells like Sabretooth. "Victor!" he shouts, but there is no reply. He looks around and finds another box. This one is wrapped in blood red paper. He uses his claws to open it. Inside is a stuffed wolverine with its head ripped off. The head is also in the box, attached to another note. Logan growls. He reads the note, which says for Logan to meet him in Central Park in half an hour. Logan jumps onto his bike, throwing the box to the ground. That doesn't leave much time.

At 12:29am, Logan reaches the park. He hops off his bike and starts sniffing around. He catches Sabretooth's scent and heads in that direction. He finds another box. "What the hell is all of this?" he wonders. This box is made up in the blood red paper and had a pretty silver bow. He slashes through the ribbon and paper with his claws. "Stupid Victor and his stupid boxes," he grumbles. Inside this box is a wax wolverine, like the kind they make at the zoo. Naturally, it's broken. There's another note. Logan growls as he reads it. The note says to meet him at an all-night coffee joint down town. It gives the specific address.

At 12:48am, Logan walks into a coffee house. There are about 12 different people there. None of them are Sabretooth. He grumbles. "Can I get you some coffee?" a pretty little waitress with blond hair and bright blue eyes asks.

"No, I'm looking for a – friend – of mine," he says gruffly.

"Are you Logan?" asks the waitress, a little too perkily for 12:49 in the morning.

"Yeah, that's me, bub," he tells her.

"Your friend Victor said to tell you he had to go, but he left you something," she says cheerfully, going to get it.

"Let me guess, a box, right?"

"Um, no, not a box," she hands him a flesh-colored bag.

"Oh, gee, um, thanks," he says.

"You know, that Victor guy is kind of scary," she whispers.

Logan snorts his laughter, "Aw, he's just a big pussy cat."

"Really?" she says with a grin.

"Thanks again," Logan says, walking out.

"My pleasure!"

Logan looks down at the bag and frowns. He reaches inside and pulls out – another stinking box! He snarls as he cuts the silver ribbon and the blood red paper. Inside the box is a framed picture of a wolverine. The note has been cut into the picture with Sabretooth's claws. This note tells him to go to Ellis Island. He throws the picture across the street.

At 1:52am, Logan finds himself and his bike getting off the ferry onto Ellis Island. He walks until he finds the familiar scent. He finds himself outside the Statue of Liberty. He sniffs and heads to the back. There is a bigger flesh-colored sack, with dark brown tissue paper. Logan is getting pretty angry about the gifts now. He tears the paper and the sack. He trashes the silver ribbon and the blood red wrapping paper. He opens the box. Inside is a piñata that looks just like Wolverine. He looks it over. There doesn't seem to be a note. The piñata isn't torn or anything. "What now?" he grumbles. He shakes the piñata, but doesn't hear candy. He does hear – a note. He tears the piñata apart to get the note, which reads:

Well, dofus, it took me three hours to make that piñata and you just tore it up. Thanks a lot. Well, since you destroyed my little masterpiece, why don't you meet me by Bayville High? I'll be waiting for you, jerk.

Logan growls again. He is getting tired of these games. "You better be there this time, Victor!" He hops on his bike and waits for the ferry.

At 3:47am, Logan reaches the high school. He sniffs around. The smell of Sabretooth is stronger now. He follows it to the soccer field and finds another bag. This flesh-colored bag is huge. The handles are tied with thick yellow ribbon. Growling, he cuts the ribbon and tears out the dark brown tissue paper. Inside this bag is a huge blood red wrapped box tied up with silver ribbon. He cuts the ribbon and paper and finds a gigantic jack-in-the-box. "You've got to be kidding me!"

He starts turning the handle. It plays the familiar melody, but instead of the part that normally says, "Pop, goes the weasel," Sabretooth pops out and says, "Pops, goes the Sabey!"

Logan tears him apart. Sabretooth doesn't fight back. Logan stops to look at what he's done. The Sabretooth was stuffed. He growls. "What is this about?" he cries out, kicking the jack-in-the-box.

"By now, you're probably wondering what this is about," Sabretooth's voice comes from the box.

"Sure am, bub," Logan grumbles.

"This is about the fight you started!"

"I didn't start that fight, you did!" Logan snaps at the box.

"You turned it physical," the box seems to anticipate his every utterance. "Well, it doesn't matter. The past is the past, but those stupid little children put me on trial and dumped me in the ocean. So, you get to pay for their crimes!"

"Ugh!" Logan shouts. "Where are you?"

"You're probably screaming with rage and frustration right now, wondering where I am. Well, here's the best part. I'm back home in bed! Ha ha ha ha ha ha! You spent the entire night on a wild goose chase while I slept soundly and warmly in my nice comfy bed. That is the greatest part of my revenge!" The box continues laughing evilly until adamantium claws burst through the voice recorder.

"Stupid, lousy, overgrown cat!" Logan screams at the box. He grabs his motorcycle and heads back to the mansion.

At 4:13am, he slams the front door. Hank walks by, holding a glass of milk and a Twinkie. "Where have you been all night?"

"I don't want to talk about it," Logan snaps.

"You smell a little like cat," Hank comments.

"Yeah, I bet I smell like stuffing and glue!" Logan growls. "I'm taking a shower. I need to wash this night off of me!"

At 6:00am, the X-Men gather in the Danger Room for a training session. Logan is at the controls. He watches as one by one, the mutants blow up the simulated opponents. He is grinning almost insanely. He even starts to laugh maniacally as they blow up one opponent after another.

Inside the Danger Room, Kurt looks up and sees him. He bamfs over to Scott. "Hey, I zink somezing is vrong vith Volverine." He points at the control room.

"I'm sure he's fine," Scott says, blasting a simulated opponent.

"Fine?" Kitty asks. "He looks like he just lost his mind!" She jumps and dodges another opponent.

"I'm sure it's nothing. Logan knows what he's doing," argues Scott as he blasts a simulated villain through a simulated wall.

"Oh yeah?" Jean asks, taking down another. "Then why do all the simulated villains look like Sabretooth today?"

The kids can hear even more laughter coming from the control room. They're starting to get scared.

At 9:00am, Sabretooth rolls out of bed and stretches. "Man, I don't think I've ever had a better night's sleep." He grins.


A/N: This is the second of three revenge tales: Sabey's revenge on the Acolytes, then Logan, then the X-Men. . . but there is no telling when I will write the third one. Life is how it is, and Sabretooth's mind is a hard one for me to grasp. Hope y'all enjoyed it!

Please review.