AN: Hey all! This is just a little oneshot that had been bouncing around my head for a while and I wanted to share it with you. Probably takes place mid shadowkiss? Or end of frostbite?

I don't own the character or the world, just the idea

Beta read by Nicia: shes the best!

The party in the Moroi dorm had been raging for at least two hours and I couldn't believe no one had busted it yet. What good were our dorm matrons and guardians patrolling the halls if they didn't even recognize a teenage party when they heard one? The party was in Jesse's dorm room, and even though Jesse was probably one of my least favorite people, I'd let Lissa drag me here along with Christian and Eddie.

She had tried to hide it from me, but I could feel it through the bond that she hoped I would have some fun and put myself out there, dating wise, again. She still thought I wouldn't date anyone because of Mason, no matter how many times I told her I hadn't liked him that way and we were never really together. Losing Mason still greatly impacted my life, but it wasn't why I didn't date. That was something else entirely. Something named Dimitri Belikov.

I was totally head over heels in love with my mentor, and him with me also. Well I'm not so sure about the head over heels bit, but he loves me. And my best friend had no idea.

About 10 minutes ago said best friend had snuck off with her boyfriend back to her dorm when she thought I wasn't looking, but being the good guardian in training that I am, I kept her in my sight at all times and hadn't had a drink all night.

The feelings coming through the bond, however, told me that Lissa was perfectly safe and happy and that she and Christian were taking advantage of the privacy to have a little party of their own... Without any clothes.

The feelings coming through were getting so strong I couldn't block them out and Lissa was threatening to suck me into her head at any moment. It made me want to bash my head against a wall. Especially when I could never be with the person I loved the way they can be together.

Finally, it just became too fucking much. If anything happened, Fireboy was more than capable to protect Lissa and there was no way I was going to be sucked into Lissa's head and virtually lose my virginity to Christian. I needed a drink to numb the bond.

A few hours later, the party was finally breaking up, but my world was spinning and I couldn't seem to properly put one foot in front of the other. Rather then risk passing out in Jesse's room, I decided it was worth it to stumble my way across campus, my drunk mind not the slightest bit worried about getting caught. As everyone exited the dorm, all around me couples were either passionately kissing goodbye or stumbling down the hall, arms wrapped tightly around each other.

Whether this was alcohol induced or just me, I couldn't tell you, but right then I wanted nothing more than to be in Dimitri's arms. I would never make it undetected to his room in the state I was in, so I needed to make him come to me. In a moment of drunken brilliance, I realized that if I let myself get caught, they would call Dimitri to be the one to deal with me. If I was going to get myself in trouble, I wasn't just going to sit down and wait for a guardian to find me. I'd been on good behavior for far too long and it was time that St. Vlads was reminded that Rose Hathaway goes here and no one causes trouble like she does.

On that note, I headed directly to the center of the high school quad and threw my head back. The stars were moving around on me, but I didn't care. I sucked in a deep breath and began to sing at the top of my lungs.

"It's raining men, hallelujah; it's raining men, amen!"

Those happened to be the only words of the song that I knew, but I added in a few dance moves of my own to keep it interesting. After about my second repeat of the lyric, someone opened up a window and yelled at me to shut up.

"You shut up!" I yelled back, "I'm singing out here you bastard!"

This only caused more windows to open up, but the bigger the commotion, the faster a guardian would find me.

Even my horribly drunk mind could tell that I was completely off key, but some people were cheering anyways.

"Ms. Hathaway!" A voice I vaguely recognized shouted from my left.

I turned towards the voice, but I must have spun too quickly because the world blurred before my eyes and I lost my footing, falling straight on my ass.

When the world stopped spinning I made out the figure of Stan towering over me looking absolutely livid.

"Hello Stan," I greeted him calmly from where I sat on the ground. He looked as if he were about to go off on me for the Stan comment, but instead he eyed me closely.

"Have you been drinking?" I wanted to laugh at how aghast he sounded.

"Yes, I have. Quite a lot to be honest with you. It was gronderful!" I told him, accidentally mixing great and wonderful together.

He reached over and grabbed me by the arm. "Get up Hathaway, you're coming with me," he barked as he dragged me to my feet.

"Hey hands off!" I shouted, "I don't need your help." Apparently I did because as soon as I tried to yank my arm out of his grasp I went stumbling sideways, almost falling again. "Okay, never mind."

He just grabbed a hold of my arm again and said, "Come on."

I waved a goodbye to my friends hanging out their dorm windows and they shouted a goodbye back at me.

"Where are you taking me? To Kirova?" I asked.

Stan snorted, "I think it's pretty clear after all these years, that taking you to Headmistress Kirova's office does nothing."

"So where are you taking me?" I asked again, hiccupping in the middle.

"Guardian Belikov," he answered shortly. If I was sober I probably could have kept the huge grin off my face, but reactions weren't the greatest at the moment.

"Why are you smiling, Hathaway?" Stan asked, eyeing my suspiciously.

Thinking as quickly as my drunk brain would allow me, I said the first excuse that came to mind. "I'm just glad you aren't yelling at me. Hey, wait, why aren't you yelling at me?"

He shook his head at me. "Why waste my breath? You're Belikovs problem now. You never listen to anyone anyways."

"I do too!" I countered, "I listen when they're saying something important." I realized a bit too late that I had indirectly insulted Stan, but in a surprising show of self control he simply took a deep breath and looked at the sky.

Before I could stop myself, I asked, "so why aren't you taking this opportunity to scream at me?" This was very out of character for him.

He pulled the door to the dhampir dorm open and pulled me inside. "I need to take Miss Hathaway to Guardian Belikov. He will escort her back to her dorm later," Stan told the matron and she nodded. Once we were out of ear shot of the matron, he spoke again. "I'm not yelling at you because I know it won't do any good. And as much of a pain as you are, I can see that you've changed in the last few months. I can only assume it's because Guardian Belikov is mentoring you so he can straighten you out tonight as well."

"I don't think I've changed that much," I mused, but my momentary lapse in concentration caused me to trip up the stairs. I guess Stan had had enough of keeping my upright because he simply let me fall and smirked at me as I struggled to get up again. Frankly, I wasn't too sure how much I like the idea of me changing. I liked the way I am or was and I didn't want to change for anybody. What was wrong with the way I was?

We had reached Dimitri's door and Stan promptly began beating the living daylights out of it. I, however, leaned up against the wall and put a hand to my forehead. Maybe drinking so much wasn't such a good idea. My alcohol fueled libido, however, disagreed.

When Dimitri opened the door, it was cleared that we had just pulled him out of bed. His hair was disheveled and he was only wearing his pajama pants. The night of the lust charm flashed through my mind and I could tell by the way Dimitri was scrutinizing me, he was thinking the same thing. Clearing the sleep from his throat, Dimitri turned to Stan, his face impassive again.

"What's going on, Guardian Alto?"

"What's going on, Guardian Belikov, is your student here was found singing on the quad in the middle of the night, under the influence of alcohol," Stan said, going out of his way to make it sound as horrible as possible. He was clearly hoping that I would get in a lot of trouble.

Dimitri turned back towards me with a hard look on his face. "Is this true, Rose?"

"One hundred percent," I told him with a smile.

Dimitri sighed and shook his head. I had a hard time not being mesmerized by the way his hair fell again his face and the sound of his sigh sent a thrill through my body. "Thank you, Alto, I'll take it form here," he said, dropping formalities.

"Good Luck," Stan chuckled, before turning and walking off down the hallway again.

"Get in, Rose." Dimitri stood aside so I could enter his room and looked at me sternly as I passed. Maybe this wasn't the best idea.

When I got inside, Dimitri directed me towards his desk chair and stood over me. Maybe he thought having me on his bed in the middle of the night, while I was drunk was a bad idea. It didn't matter though because I fully intended on ending up there by the end of this.

At first, Dimitri just stared at me, so I decided to break the silence. "Hey Comrade." He was not amused.

"What were you thinking?" he asked." It's amazing how easy it is for him to make me feel like an immature child and my earlier thoughts came rushing back. I knew exactly why I had changed and would most likely continue changing. It was because of Dimitri. He made me a better person. It was hard for me to accept at first, but it was true and regardless of my feelings for him, I wanted to make him proud and prove to him and everyone else that I could be a guardian. And that was worth changing for.

So I told him the whole story right from the beginning, starting with Lissa dragging me to the party and the running off with Christian to me needing alcohol to numb the bond because I didn't want to virtually lose my virginity to Christan.

"And everyone was leaving the party with their girlfriend or boyfriend," I continued, "And I was alone." I was silent for a moment. "I just wanted someone to kiss me.

Dimitri gave me a weird look. I think it was half shock because I was showing a sensitive side and half worry at the topic I was heading towards… us.

Unperturbed, I plowed on. "You want to kiss me, don't you?"

He took a deep breath as his eyes went wide. I don't think he expected me to push the subject. For a moment, I thought he would ignore the question, but instead he sighed and said, "Of course I do, Roza." I grinned broadly at him before he spoke again. "But that still doesn't explain why you were out on the quad singing in the middle of the night."

"Oh that," I laughed, "that was my plan," I told him, "quite brilliant if you ask me. I knew I couldn't sneak in here to see you, as drunk as I am, so I purposefully got caught so a guardian would bring me to you."

Dimitri let out a full bodied laugh. "You are so…" unable to find the correct word, he settled for a shake of the head.

I stood up and swayed a little bit until the world stopped spinning, before slowly side stepping around him and seating myself on the bed. He didn't turn and face me, but I could tell from the tension in his shoulders that he knew what I had done.

"I fully intend to get what I came here for," I told him, emboldened by the alcohol.

He turned to face me. "You didn't come here, Rose, you were dragged."

"Technicality," I stated, "don't change the subject." He took a step closer, but I could see how much he was warring with himself over the decision. I actually felt a bit bad for making his job so hard, but not bad enough to stop. Curling my fingers around the waistband of his pajama pants, I pulled him towards me, while another part of my brain reveled in the fact that he was shirtless.

"Dimitri, there is a beautiful drunk girl in your bed and if you won't take advantage of it, I might have to go find someone who will."

"Don't say that, Roza," he whispered as he reached up to cup my face in his hands. I leaned into his touch. "You know why I have to say no."

"I do. But I don't care."

With that, I yanked him down to my level and knotted my fingers in his hair. I needed to hold him still so I could properly press my lips to his, with my current level of coordination. He had plenty of time to pull away, but he didn't, just like I knew he wouldn't. When I pressed my lips to his, there was a split second of resistance before he gave in and kissed me back. It didn't stop there though. He gently pushed me backwards on to the bed and moved so that he was hovering over me.

I could tell that he was trying not to crush me, but I didn't care. I wanted to feel every inch of his body against mine, so I wrapped my leg around his waist and pulled him down on top of me. He took one of his hands from my face and slid it down the back of my leg and I hummed in pleasure at the feel of his calloused hand on the bare skin below my shorts. His other hand moved to knot its self in my hair while my hands ran down his chest.

My skin, which was already overheated from the alcohol, now felt like it was on fire, way to hot to be wearing clothes, so I reached down and started to tug my shirt. Seeing that I was trying to do, Dimitri immediately replaced my hands with his and pulled it off while managing to rub his hands all the way up my sides. As soon as I was free of my shirt, his lips were back on mine, our tongues intertwining. I ran my nails up his chest and over his shoulders. A groan escaped his mouth and he started kissing me with more fervor.

Any other kiss we'd ever shared paled in comparison to this one, but the alcohol only made me want more. I broke my mouth away from his to press my lips to his chest, needing to taste his skin. It was slightly salty and tasted like something I could only describe as Dimitri. I pushed him up slightly so I could reach lower with my mouth and as I did, I noted with pleasure that Dimitri's breathing got heavier.

He brought my chin back up to his and kissed along my jaw line, over to my neck. "Roza," he breathed into my neck and I gasped at the feelings that it sent humming through my body. He gently pushed my bra strap aside and kissed his way from my shoulder down my arm, murmuring my name mixed in with some Russian.

I was in sensory overload. All I could see and feel was Dimitri. He was occupying my whole world. I did notice, however, when his hands moved to the clasp of my shorts and nimbly undid it. He didn't take them off, just unbuttoned them, but the ease with which he popped the button open, while kissing me and with one hand still entwined in my hair that he loved so much, made me wonder how many women had been in the exact same position with him.

Suddenly I felt like an inexperienced child. Just because I hadn't had sex didn't mean that I was inexperienced and I felt I had to prove that to him. I pushed him up and off me, gasping for breath. At first he looked confused and a little hurt, but I just stood up off the bed and shimmied out of my shorts, dropping them slowly on the floor. I tossed my hair over my shoulder and he studied me just like he had the day he had caught me with Jesse.

Still flush from the heat of his look, I slowly crawled back on the bed and dragged his pants down his long legs. So thankful that I had worn matching underwear, even if they were just black cotton, I climbed on top of Dimitri, his calloused hands going around my waist. One of my favorite things about him was his large hands. It wasn't very often that I felt small and delicate, but the feel of his hands covering my waist did it to me every time.

He ran his hands up my sides, clutching me closer to him and I shivered in pleasure. Attaching his mouth to my collar bone, he kissed in towards the center of my chest and down between my breasts. My skin felt as if was about to burst into flames, the things this man did to me. I'd hooked up with plenty of guys and I had never ever felt anything like this from just kissing.

Suddenly, Dimitri gripped me tightly around the waist and rolled us so that he was kneeling above me. He began kissing his way down my stomach and I sucked in a huge breath when he reached my underwear line, but he skipped right over them and continued placed wet kisses down my leg. When he reached my foot, he slid back up my body and I secured his mouth to his.

After another immeasurable amount of time spent kissing and touching, or maybe it was a few minutes, I couldn't tell you because being drunk isn't exactly great for keeping time, I decided I wanted to move this forward.

"Dimitri," I whispered in his ear, as I ran a foot down the back of his bare leg, "I want to have sex." No use beating around the bush. He froze, completely still, before burying his face in my hair.

"Roza," he groaned, "I want to. Oh god, do I want to…" he trailed off.

"But, you're saying no," I said, trying to keep the hurt out of my voice. He picked up on it anyways.

"You don't know how hard it is to say no to you right now."

"So don't," I argued, "for once, Dimitri, just say yes."

He pulled back to look me in the eyes. "I'm not saying no. Just not right now."

"Why not now?" I whined, not caring that I sounded like a belligerent child.

"It's got nothing to do with me not wanting you, trust me. It's just that you've been drinking and I don't want you to do something that you'd regret."

"I won't," I cut in.

"That's not all," He continued, "This would be your first time, correct?" I gulped and nodded, looking away from him. He placed a finger under my chin and brought my eyes back to his. "You should enjoy it with a clear head."

"Well like you said, it's my first time, not yours, so I should decide," I said as I ran my fingers lightly down his chest, attempting to seduce him into saying yes. He caught my hand and pinned in above my head before brushing his nose across my cheek, breathing deeply.

"But it will be out first time together, Roza, and I want us to remember it for the rest of our lives."

"Fine, you win," I huffed, but I smiled, pleased that he valued us so much. "Dimitri," I spoke suddenly. He paused while leaning down to kiss me so that my breath washed across his face. "How many women have you slept with?" A look of shock crossed his face, before he gave me a strange look. "I'm just curious," I told him.

He gazed at me, thoughtful for a moment before conceding to answer. "A few, but they're in my past. No one can ever compare to you, my Roza, and no one ever will."

"I hope I never find out if anyone compares to you," I whispered, tracing my fingers across his lips.

And then he kissed me again. It was slow and passionate and filled with more love then I could even imagine. I wrapped my arms around him and held him to me as tightly as I could. He shifted his mouth to neck and grazed his teeth along it before biting down gently. I didn't care that he was probably giving me a hickey. On the contrary, I was excited to have physical proof that this night hadn't been a part of my imagination.

I decided that he needed a reminder too, loving the idea of seeing it on him in practice the next day. Smiling coyly up at him, I moved my mouth to his neck and licked a spot on it before biting down gently. He groaned and pulled me harder against him. In a shocking move, he reached behind me to unclasp my bra and soon enough, we were both naked, clinging to each other and kissing endlessly.

Eventually, Dimitri pulled away from me and rolled to the other side of the bed.

"Where do you think you're going?"

"Rose, if we keep this up, I don't know how much longer I'll be able to keep from making love to you." He looked pained and I knew that I could press the issue, but I didn't want to make it worse for him and, in a way, I knew he was right. Now that I was sobering up, I realized I didn't want to have sex tonight. I didn't want to make the same mistake Lissa did and have sex at the wrong time. I wanted to have a clear head and remember every single moment of it because I knew it would be perfect. When you were losing your virginity to the person you loved and who loved you back, how could it not be?

The sky was beginning to lighten outside his window. I couldn't believe I'd been here almost the entire night, but I couldn't regret it. It was the best night of my life.

"Alright, I'll get dressed and you can take me back to my room," I sighed and rolled out of bed.

He sat up and looked at me pulling on my clothes. I had to stop myself from jumping right back into bed at the sight of him.

"You aren't going to fight me on this?" He cocked an eyebrow at me.

"No actually, I agree with you." I stumbled a little pulling on my shorts. Maybe I wasn't as sober as I felt. Dimitri stood up and kissed me once before getting himself dressed as well. Once we were dressed, I smiled at Dimitri happily, knowing that no matter how hung over I was tomorrow, I would be walking around with a goofy smile on my face.

Dimitri and I checked the hall before quietly ducking out into the hallway, reminding me of the couples leaving the party. I suppressed a laugh, realizing that I had indeed gotten exactly what I wanted.

Just as we were about to enter the stairwell, a voice called to us from over Dimitri's shoulder. It was Stan.

"Belikov, are you just taking Hathaway back to her room now?" He shouted.

"We had a long talk, Guardian Alto," I said, affecting my most innocent voice.

"And I wanted her to sober up a bit before I walked her back to her dorm," Dimitri said, already backing away into the stairwell away from Stan.

Stan strode towards us down the hallway, squinting his eyes. "What are those on your necks?" I he asked. I don't think he suspected what they actually were, but either way, we didn't want a closer inspection.

"I, uh," I looked at Dimitri for help. He shrugged.

I took off running as fast as I could, knowing that Dimitri could follow without question. I heard him shout, "Sorry, Alto," before tearing off after me. As soon as we were out of Stan's line of sight, I took his hand in mine.

"We should do that again sometime, Comrade," I said, before we both looked at each other and started to laugh.

AN: please review and tell me what you think!

To OOC? Good? Bad? Tell me either way please!

~LLM