Hello everyone.

This story is rated M for a reason, so it will contain cursing and mild sexual content.

I have nothing against any of the characters in the story.

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.

It's slightly KakaSaku, so be prepared!

Enjoy!

~O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o~

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Fuck.

The first thing Sasuke realized when he opened his eyes was that all he could see was white. The second thing he realized was the something was pressed against his face, something made of fabric, making it difficult to breathe. And the third thing he realized was that it smelt horribly, like rotting cheese. It made him want to puke. At first Sasuke wondered what the hell it was that had woken him, but after a moment it dawned on him.

It had five fingers, or toes to be precise, and was covered by little more a tattered sock. It wiggled. It smelt…

There could be only one explanation to this insanity.

It was a foot.

And Sasuke knew whose exactly it belonged to. Naruto Uzumaki.

Shit. Sasuke thought. I hate my life.

Glaring at the foot, Sasuke pushed it off his face and threw it onto the wooden floor, his face full of pure disgust as he wondered why the hell he had to share a room with the blond twit. He didn't care that Team 7 was currently on a mission that would take them to the Land of Fire in the morning, he just didn't. This was not the way a heir of the Uichia clan should be treated. It was despicable. Did none of his teammates have some self respect?

This hotel that they were staying in was in poor condition and so old that it should be demolished by a wrecking ball. The room that the team was currently staying in was especially bad. It smelt of urine, blood, mold, and maybe even traces of sex that hadn't been properly taken care of. The floor creaked constantly under their feet and was beginning to rot. There were holes in the walls and the curtains covering the windows had been eaten away at by moths. The bathroom didn't even have a toilet! Just a hole in the floor that had to be used instead. And the beds? Hell, it was better sleeping on the floor.

Sasuke blamed his sensei, Kakashi, for this. The old man just had to be a cheapskate! Of all the hotels he could choose, he just had to choose this one. And they all had to share a single apartment no less! Sure, it had two separate bedrooms, one for Sakura and one that all the boys shared, but this was just nuts…Kakashi was such a bastard. Sasuke even had a strange suspicion that his sensei had done it deliberately on purpose so that he could stay close to Sakura. What a child molester…But, Sasuke had to give Kakashi credit, for he really knew how to chase a woman down, by flirting with them and just messing around…Sakura was an easy picking for the copy ninja.

But as you can guess, Sasuke didn't like that one bit. Over the past few months, Sasuke had really begun to realize that he had feelings for the pink haired kunoichi. Sure, she was loud and annoying, but there was something about her that Sasuke just…liked. Was it her slender body? Her beautiful green eyes? Or was it the fact that she had been one of the only people in Konoha that was happy when he came back to the village, after four years of serving Orchimaru? Sasuke didn't know. He just didn't like anyone messing with his potential girlfriend and maybe even future wife…

Sasuke was jealous of his own sensei. Damn that man.

Looks like I have a new goal to accomplish in life. Sasuke thought, the faint traces on a slightly insane smile forming at the corners of his lovely lips. Keep Kakashi away from my cherry blossom.

With this in mind, the Uichia decided to try and go back to sleep for the night. He closed his eyes.

15 minutes later…

Zzzz…ZZZZZZZ….

Sasuke kept tossing and turning under the blankets as he tried to block out Naruto's loud snores and find some way to go to sleep. He really didn't want to have an all nighter, but by the look of things that was probably going to happen anyway.

But he needed to sleep. He had to keep trying…

ZZZZZ….

The raven haired Uichia's eyes abruptly opened into the darkness of the apartment. Who was he kidding? He couldn't take this! He was going to go crazy if he heard one more-

ZZZZZ….

Snore.

Sasuke's eyes twitched. He had enough of this. The blond haired idiot was going to get it.

"Naruto, He hissed, glaring at the jinjurki's sleeping form, "wake up. Now."

Zzzz…

"That's it. I'm going to kill you."

If Naruto had been awake during this time, he probably would have been scared shitless at how dangerously low Sasuke's voice was and perhaps piss his pants out of mere freight. He might of even begged Sasuke for mercy. But no. He was still off in dreamland, dreaming of a giant bowl of ramen that kept calling to him, and snoring so loudly that he sounded remotely like a jet plane. He didn't realize the potential injuries he could suffer.

Poor, clueless, Naruto.

Sighing, Sasuke walked over to the sleeping boy, fighting the urge to kick the idiot in the groin. His eyes growing more accustomed to the darkness, Sasuke couldn't help but roll his eyes as he took in Naruto's appearance. Even at 16 years of age, the blond still wore those ridiculous froggy pajamas, accompanied by the stupid matching hat. Right next to Naruto, a pool of drool was forming, his mouth lolling wide open as if he was trying to swallow a watermelon.

"Idiot." Sasuke muttered, kicking him in the side, "wake up."

But that seemed to not phase the future hokage at all, for all that seemed to do was make him snort and mutter dreamily to no one in particular, "Ramen…"

Finally losing the little patience he still had, Sasuke bent over and wrapped his hand around Naruto's neck, squeezing it enough that it caused the sleeping boy's breathing to become rough and labored. But Sasuke didn't stop, he wouldn't until the boy woke up or died from suffocation. His body thrashing wildly, Sasuke found it difficult to keep a hold on Naruto's neck as the second ticked by, until at last the demon container opened his eyes. His face almost as blue as the t-shirt Sasuke usually wore, the boy gasped, "What the hell are you doing Sasuke?"

Sasuke smirked. It had worked. "Waking you up, dobe." He said, releasing his hold on Naruto's neck. "Dreaming about ramen again are we?"

"You…bastard!" Naruto croaked, catching his breath. "You could of killed me you fucking idiot! What exactly were you-"

"Like I said. Waking you up." Sasuke repeated.

"I know that, teme! But what did I ever do to you?"

Sasuke could think of a million answers to the remark, but instead said bluntly," You were snoring too fucking loud, Naruto. I'm surprised Sakura didn't come out here and kick your ass because of it. Consider yourself lucky Naruto that I was the one who woke you up instead of her."

Naruto opened his mouth to argue, but something stopped him and he closed it. Perhaps his mentally disturbed friend was right. Getting woken up by him was a picnic compared to Sakura's fist punching him into the wall. Much better. Resisting the urge to shudder, Naruto replied, "Perhaps your right teme. I really didn't want to go back home after this mission with a broken leg or anything. So thanks, I guess…"

"Hn. Whatever dobe. You're lucky I didn't kill you."

Naruto just rolled his eyes. "Teme, you know Kakashi-sensei would never allow that to happen, right?"

At the mention of said sensei, the two young boys glanced over to the spot where Kakashi would be sleeping peacefully, or perhaps reading his Icha Icha book in the darkness. But, surprisingly, he wasn't there. His bed looked like it hadn't been touched, like he had never even slept in it and his personal belongings were laying neatly on top.

Both Naruto and Sasuke found this very odd, even for Kakashi. It wasn't usual for him disappear in the middle of the night like this.

"Hey Sasuke, do you know where Kakashi-sensei is?" Naruto asked.

"No, you stupid idiot. Don't you think I'd tell you if I knew?" He snorted contemptuously.

"Well I was just asking-"

"Shut up dobe." Sasuke interjected suddenly, covering Naruto's mouth. "Do you hear that?" He asked.

"Hear what?" Naruto said, his voice muffled. "I don't hear anything. What are you talking about?"

But Sasuke didn't answer. He was too busy trying to figure out what he thought he heard just a second ago. It had sounded like, dare he say it, a moan. A woman's moan. But if it was, then the only one who could of done it was…

Sakura.

He heard another moan come from her room, this time louder than before, full of something his teenage mind wouldn't dare to comprehend. He stiffened. What the hell was going on in there?

Even Naruto heard the moan, and naturally, his cerulean eyes grew wide with worry, and his body started to fidget nervously in moon lit room. But he managed to keep his voice low for once when he asked worriedly, "Is Sakura-Chan alright?"

Sasuke tried to be as indifferent as possible.

"She's probably just sick or something, dobe. I'm sure she's fine."

Naruto shook his head in disagreement. "I don't think so. She sounds like she's hurting or something…We should go check it out. Make sure she's okay."

"Hn. Whatever, dobe."

Naruto just rolled his eyes. He knew Sasuke was equally as worried, even though the Uichia's voice sounded almost bored, uncaring. The blond knew his best friend had a soft spot for the kunchioi even though he didn't show it. Years of being on a team with the bastard had enabled Naruto to learn such things. But instead of pointing that out, Naruto kept quiet. He didn't feel like losing the little feeling in his ass that was still there. He needed it.

So it was that the two boys walked over soundlessly to the room that their teammate was in, their shadows creeping up along the wall, like little mischievous ghouls that loved nothing more than to cause pain in the world of humans.

Knocking on the door, Sasuke waited to hear a response from the pink haired girl, to reassure himself that nothing was wrong except maybe an illness that had befallen her. But the two boys didn't get a coherent response, just another moan that sent shivers down their spines.

"We should just bust right in that room right now! I don't freaking care if she'll kick our asses later. I'm worried about Sakura-Chan!"

Sasuke said nothing. For once he agreed with the moron, surprisingly, much to his chagrin. But at rare moments like this, the dobe actually made sense.

Gritting his teeth, Sasuke decided to do it. Turning the knob slowly, ignoring the weird feeling the was bubbling up inside his chest, he opened the door.

"Sakura, are you alright?" He asked, trying to see into the darkness.

No response except that odd moaning again.

And such was the fate the Naruto burst into the room carelessly-

"Sakura-Chan! Are you ok?"

-and turned on the lights…

But simply nothing could prepare them for what they saw once the lights turned on, not even years of ninja training, which supposedly made them ready for anything that might happen that was out of the ordinary. Nothing. Not even the most experienced ninja…

Such as it is, the boys found the single girl on their team and their supposed "responsible" sensei on a bed. Naked.

No wonder Sakura was moaning. No wonder why Kakashi had been missing. No wonder why Sasuke felt like something was off…

Oh. Oh. Oh

The pieces had suddenly fit. Like the world had finally shown the light of the day. Like a light bulb been had turned on…

Sex. Sasuke and Naruto's minds inwardly screamed. Their teammates had been having sex!

An awkward silence filled the room as the two lovebirds tried to cover themselves up under the blanket, trying to find an excuse that could possibly explain why they were naked. But nothing came. Just an even more awkward silence.

As if trying to lighten the room's suddenly very tense atmosphere, Kakashi chuckled nervously, "Hello boys, we were just..um..wonderful morning, eh?"

"Wonderful morning…?" Sakura squeaked. mortified, her face almost as pink as her rosy locks, "I don't think that'll-"

But she stopped suddenly as a body hit the ground. His face pale, his eyes full of shock, everyone watched as a certain raven haired boy fainted.

Kakashi shook his head. "Poor Sasuke. You never did realize that there's a first time for everything, did you? I'm guessing not."

Sakura blushed even harder as she looked back at Naruto. "Naruto are you-"

"I'm fine, Naruto interjected quickly, much to Kakashi and Sakura's amazement, "Just tell me one thing."

"What?"

Naruto paused, suddenly looking very embarrassed. He had to chose his words carefully in a situation like this. Prevy Sage would of, well for the sake of his "research". Naruto, on the other hand, was just curious. Truly curious, even though he should be freaked out of his wits…

"Did either of you use a condom?" He inquired.

Both Sakura and Kakashi's cheeks flamed, but this time not because of embarressement. Anger.

"What the hell, Naruto!" Sakura cried, her voice acidic.

The blond just shrugged. "I was just wondering. What if you're pregnant?"

Sakura just raised her fist. Screw it if she was fucking naked. This time the idiot had gone to far.

"Oh you're gonna pay." She whispered.

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"NARUTO!"

CRASH.

~O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o~

Thanks for reading! Please review! :D