"And now we'll start this year's Kiwi Royale!" a fat Japanese man said to a group of Two-Legs.

"Kiwi Royale? What's that?" one of the people said. He was old, ugly, and stupid. His name was George Bush and he liked to pick his nose. Alot.
The fat Japanese man threw a kiwi at George Bush. The juicy fruit broke open in mid-air and squirted it's evil kiwi juice in George Bush's eye.

"Kiwi Royale, motha f*cka!" the fat Japanese man screamed.

Meanwhile, in the land of chocolate fudge, Swiftpaw was waiting to board a train. He paced up and down the platform and often glanced at the ginormous clock. Toot! Toot!

The train was coming. And right on time too. Swiftpaw was preparing to board the train when he noticed a group of about 50 coconuts lined up side by side on the platform. They were holding hands.
"Fudge! Chocolate! Hershey!" the coconuts shouted then jumped in front of the train which was not really a train at all but a giant peanut butter sandwich. The peanut butter sandwich couldn't stop. It was sliding on too much coconut milk!

"Ahhhhhh!" everyone on the platform screamed as they were sprayed with bits of coconut.

Nobody could believe what had happened. Harry Potter had finally defeated Lord Voldemort and the entire platform was in chaos!

"Pikachu! Thunderbolt!" Ash Ketchum screamed, jumping out of nowhere and round-house kicking the yellow rat onto the platform.

The yellow rat was silenced by a kiwi hitting him on the head. All he heard before he went unconscious was "Kiwi Royale, motha f*cka!"

"Nooooo!" Ash began to cry.
He couldn't believe it. What happened to his rat? He beating on Pikachu with a giant watermelon.

"Wake up, Pikachu!"

Suddenly the dog walking down the street which, in all reality, isn't even relevant to the story runs up to Ash and pisses on his leg.
"What the heck?" Bulletpaw shrieked as a Two-Leg began hitting him with a giant, sharp stick. Those Two-Legs were always messing with Bulletpaw and his family. Always hurting them.

"What is he doing, Bulletpaw? Make him stop!" Jerry, the one legged, blind squirrel with one ear that lives with Bulletpaw sobbed but there was nothing Bulletpaw could do. This looked like a job for...

(Dun dun dun duuuuunn "Never fear, Underdog is-" BOOM!