I don't own anybody in this story except for Mary-Sue. I understand that the characters may be out of character, but that is the point of a Mary-Sue fic. This fic is meant to make fun of Mary-Sues.

It is a typical day after school. The Glee club is making their typical meeting after school when an atypical thing happened.

"Everybody," Rachel Berry began. "My cousin Mary-Sue Berry just moved in with me and is joining our Glee club." The class stared at Mary-Sue in awe. She looked a lot like Rachel, but with a smaller nose. She had long, shiny, cascading blonde hair. She has purple eyes and she is wearing super sexy goth clothing. So basically, she's totally freaking hot. However, she has a tiny scar behind her left ear, which is basically her only imperfection.

"Damn, Rachel," Puck said. "You got a hot cousin!" All the other guys, along with Santana and Brittany, nodded in agreement.

"Welcome, Mary-Sue," said Will Schuester. "Why don't you tell everybody a little about yourself?"

"My name is Mary-Sue Sylvester Serenity Yu-Gi-Oh Starfire Berry Blueberry Strawberry Raspberry Blackberry Puckleberry St. Berry Faberry Pezberry Berry," said Mary-Sue. "I'm a better singer and dancer than everyone in here combined. I'm especially better than Rachel. I like listening to crappy music that nobody has ever heard of and I have magical mutant powers."

"Okay," said Mr. Schue. "Can you sing a song for us?" Mary-Sue started singing a song that nobody has ever heard of. When the song was over, everybody, except Rachel, clapped. Rachel can't stand the thought of anyone being a better singer than her.

"That was great!" exclaimed Mr. Schue. "It's my favorite song of all time." Everybody else, except for Rachel, nodded in agreement. "I'm in love!" all the guys exclaimed. Sam broke up with Quinn. Mike broke up with Tina. Artie broke up with Brittany. Quinn and Tina are pissed. Brittany, on the other hand, was glad that Artie broke up with her because she's also fallen in love with Mary-Sue. Mr. Schue has also fallen in love with Mary-Sue and is completely willing to go against the rules to date her.


The next day at school, Rachel is talking to Mary-Sue. "There's Azimio and Karofsky," Rachel said. "They like to give slushie facials to Glee kids." Azimio and Karofsky walked up to the two girls and slushied Rachel. "She's in Glee club too," said Rachel, who is getting more and more jealous of her cousin. "Yeah, but she's cool for a Glee kid," said Azimio. "We don't slushie hot chicks," said Karofsky. Azimio and Karofsky walked away as Finn walked up to Rachel.

"Rachel, I have something important to ask you," said Finn. "You want to get back together?" asked Rachel. "No! Are you high? I want to ask out Mary-Sue," replied Finn. Rachel groaned and did a facepalm.


During lunch, Kurt decided to make a visit to McKinley High. "Finn just told me your cousin just joined Glee club," Kurt said to Rachel. "He's right. She's gorgeous."

"At least you're not in love with her," Rachel said.

"Here's the really funny thing, Rachel," said Kurt, who had a huge smile on his face. "I'm in love with her too. She turned me straight."

"What?" Rachel exclaimed. That can't be possible. Both of Rachel's dads have told her that they tried to be straight when they were younger and that converting to another sexuality is impossible.

"OH HELL NO!" Mercedes shouted. She still had a crush on Kurt and hated that he became straight because of Mary-Sue.


Mary-Sue walked down the hallway and ran into Sue Sylvester. "So you're the new addition to Glee club," Sue said. "Well, don't even think about joining my Cheerios."

"Like I'd want to join your stinky Cheerios anyway, Sue Sylvester," retorted Mary-Sue. Normally, Sue would have something snarkier to say. But this time, Sue accepted defeat and walked away.


Rachel is having the worst day of her life and it's all because of Mary-Sue. Mary-Sue's a better singer than her. She managed to avoid a slushie facial and got asked out by Finn. She turned Kurt straight and even joined the football team.

Rachel decided to pay a visit to Sandy Ryerson, Lima's resident pervert. She told Sandy all about her cousin and what's she's doing.

"She's a Mary-Sue," said Sandy. "She's too perfect to exist and she even managed to turn a gay boy straight. I read and write a lot of fanfiction so I find Mary-Sue's very easy to spot. The only way to get rid of her is to kill her." Sandy handed Rachel his gun and wished her good luck.

Rachel found Mary-Sue chatting with all the guys as they swooned over her. Rachel normally wouldn't use a gun, but desperate times called for desperate measures. She aimed the gun at her cousin and shot her. Because Mary-Sue is now dead, the universe is restored.