A/N: Intro in Vulcan. I apologise. Again, most of my knowledge of Vulcan is a bit random:

Me: Go on, say it Spocky!

Spock: No. I refuse to say this. I was humiliated enough in the last chapter; I will not say this.

Me: Oh. I did ask nicely. Do you want me to tell Bones that you used to have a teddy bear.

Spock: It was alive, and had six-inch fangs. And it is called a 'sehlat'.

Me: Bones doesn't need to know that.

Spock: Fine. Pon Farr ka'ranji. Ashau Tlingansu. This is ridiculous - it is floccinaucinihilipilification.

Me: Wow. I know you are a Vulcan, and I know I am writing this and learnt that word yesterday, but still, wow.

Spock: Why was I using awful grammar to pronounce my undying love to a cactus and then to a Klingon?

Me: Erm… I don't know? Anyway, I don't own Star Trek, much as I would like to! *gets nerve-pinched*

2. Bowling ball shiner


To boldly find out what happens when we take away a certain half-Vulcan's bowling ball shiner.


Again, it was nearing the end of beta shift, and everyone was getting rather tired. Everyone, that is, except for two people. One was Spock, Vulcans not needing as much sleep as humans; the other was the Captain. He was too excited to be tired, and was looking forward to the end of the shift...

At last! The shift was over! Making his way out of the door, Jim Kirk stealthily slipped into the turbo lift with a wink to his communications officer to tell her to distract Spock for a while. She took the hint and made her way over to the half-Vulcan.

"So... Hey, Spock – what's up?"

"In or to a higher position: looking up, or, in a direction opposite to the centre of the earth or a comparable-"

"Spock – I don't want the whole dictionary definition, I just want to know what's wrong."

"Oh. If you are referring to my emotional state, Vulcans do not feel emotion. Therefore, nothing is 'wrong'. However, you may be referring to my physical state of being, in which case, I am perfectly well, thank you."

The lieutenant face-palmed. She took a deep breath and began "Spock, I don't know why I'm doing this – the captain told me to distract you for a bit, and I think he's done with doing whatever he was going to do in your quarters and- I think I said too much..." she trailed off as the Vulcan rushed off in the direction of the turbo-lift.

He's been acting a little strangely recently, Uhura mused, ever since that incident with the shoe polish. I wonder what his problem is. Honestly, having fluorescent orange hair is kind of cool, not something to be embarrassed about! Oh well, I guess it's just him being all Vulcanish –having to be logial all the time would get to anybody...

This train of thought slowed and then came to a halt, as she realised that she should have left to meet Scotty in Rec. Room 5 about half an hour ago. She began to curse her stupidity at following the captain's orders...


Jim ran down the corridors casting furtive looks around him – it might be a bit suspicious if he was caught spending too much time hanging around Spock's quarters. Although, he was the Captain – he had every right to be wherever he wanted to be.

Using his Captain's override code, he opened the door to Spock's quarters and quickly slipped inside. There it was, sitting inconspicuously in the corner of the room, under a dark red cloth and with several pointy-looking things on top of it (he was not exactly sure why a pacifist and peace-loving Vulcan would decorate his quarters with ancient Vulcan weapons, but oh well). He gingerly removed the pointy things, and wheeled the incredibly heavy bowling-ball-shiner through their shared bathroom and into his quarters, where he tried to hide it under his bed but realised it wouldn't fit, and so settled for the wardrobe instead. With luck Spock wouldn't look in there... He labelled it 'Under ware Draw' in large, pink, permanent marker letters just in case.


Again, the entire bridge crew were ready and waiting for the First Officer, who was late for the second time that week. But they all knew why… And most of them knew what was probably going to happen to them if they so much as even let out a suppressed giggle, but they still wanted to see it. That 'it' being Spock's hair.

Eventually, after what seemed like a very long time, the half-Vulcan emerged onto the bridge, not looking his usual perfectly groomed self.

Yes, his hair was straight, and black (unlike last time, where it had been fluorescent orange), but it was not exactly shiny. This could possibly be something to do with the absence of his bowling ball shiner in his quarters, but Spock would have to ask a certain James Tiberius Kirk about that


All's well that ends well - Spock got his bowling ball shiner back, and he had no comment on the matter when his captain turned up in Sick Bay comatose and upon waking up complained about a very bad headache, mumbling something about a 'damned Vulcan death-grip'

Captain's Log, Stardate 2875.4

Ouchy-ouch. HEADACHE! Note to self: Do. Not. Ever. Repeat. This. Experiment. Again. Ever.


Sorry about the wait… I got lost on the path of life… And I also had a lot of homework to do, and a lot of people pestering me to draw them all manga style (ARWEN). So I didn't have much time to do this. And I also was thinking, or attempting/failing to think of a plot for the next chapter of Bunny, Bunny.

Review Replies:

aiji-mango: Thanks for the review. And glad you like the story.

Tigwidge: Do I really need to reply - I think I already did at school. Oh well, you might feel left out otherwise… Thanks for the review.

Kobato00: That would be really adorable - a kid Spocky nerve pinching all the bullies! Anyway, thanks!

Shadowgal98: Me too… Especially if they're called Spock! Hope the intro was ok? Thanks for the review!

And so my friends, until next chapter, so long, and thanks for all the fish/reviews.