A/N I've always kind of wondered why Rachel was so willing to take a chance on Puck in Mashup after everything he did to her, so this is my version of how they got to that point. Review if you enjoy, or even if you just have something to say :)

When he was five he thought she was the biggest freak alive. She came in to kindergarten with two men behind her, and no mom, and beamed around the room and then introduced herself to every single child there. He could still remember how she had asked his name, and held out her hand to him as though they were grown ups and not in kindergarten. He had snarled at her and pushed her over. Because who did she think she was?

Her Dad's had rushed right over, and pulled her to her feet and checked she was okay. They had shaken their heads at him, and the taller one had mumbled about it being the parents fault. Puck had scoffed, because seriously, what did he know? Just because he was the only kid there without his parents didn't mean he was a screwup. His Mom had to work. Thats it.

He could've apologised, made things better, but he didn't. He waited until all the parents had gone and she was sitting at the colouring table, her little tongue poked out in concentration with no one around.

"Crybaby." He had whispered in her ear, and it was possibly the nicest thing he would ever say to her.


They were in third grade now, and Rachel Berry was still considered a freak. Now it wasn't just by Puck, but by most of her peers. It was nothing major, because after all they were only eight, but Rachel still tried desperately not to cry when she would sit down at a lunch table, and all the other girls would get up. Instead she would smile, and sit there chewing every mouthful meticulously as if she didn't mind the solitude.

When it was time for projects, and their teacher asked them to get into pairs, Rachel asked if she could work alone, because she was far too smart for anyone else to keep up with. She didn't say it was because no one would want to partner her. The teacher knew what was going on, but really she didn't have the energy to deal with it. Instead she just waved her hand dismissively.

For the following few weeks, all of Rachel's spare time when she wasn't at dance, or vocal lessons, was spent on her project. Her Dad's would help her, and neatly type up anything she needed. She drew pictures and diagrams, and learnt all sorts of fancy words to impress her class mates with. She thought maybe if she did the best presentation ever they would all want to be friends with her. Or be partners with her at least.

On the day of the presentation she was cornered in the cloakroom by Puck when she was hanging up her coat. He had asked her about her project. Rachel's smile lit up the dingy room and she immediately pulled it out to show him. It was almost as big as her, and she saw him eye it slowly.

"How much?" He had asked, reaching into the back pocket of his jeans and pulling out several crinkled dollar bills.

"I'm not selling my project." She had gasped, and clutched it close to her.

He had grunted and then hit it, satisfied when the board broke right down the middle. When Rachel was called upon later that day, she shook her head and ran out the room. He went next, Finn beside him, and tried to be his usual self, but he could feel her eyes on him, lurking in the corner of the room and for the first time in his life he felt ashamed.


Its the end of sixth grade now and Quinn Fabray is hosting a pool party for all of her class. Its the first grown up party that most of them have been too, and its been all that people have talked about weeks. Except for one. Rachel has kept her head down, and tried to block out any conversations she hears about it because shes not invited.

Its the day before the infamous party when Noah Puckerman comes up to her in the playground. She's so surprised that she almost falls of her swing. Puck is cool, he's friends with nearly everyone, and the only people that aren't his friends are people he picks up on. Sadly, she falls into the latter category.

"You want to go Quinns?" She wants to correct his language, but she fears that will lead him to come up with new meaner nicknames for her. Then she thinks about his question. She wants to answer yes, because right now its what she wants most in the world. But Noah isn't a nice boy, and if she tells him that then he will mostly just laugh at her. But theres a look in his eyes, and she finds herself nodding.

"Cool. Be there at 11." And then he gets up and saunters off just like that. She opens her book again, but can hardly concentrate, because not only was she just invited to her first ever party, but it's to go with Noah Puckerman.

She can barely sleep with excitement that night.

The next morning she is up at 7, and trying on every single swimsuit that she owns. She finally picks out a yellow one with little flowers embroidered on, and sets upon the task of choosing an outfit to wear over. She manages to find a little yellow sundress that goes with her bikini perfectly, and she's happy because its the first time in so long that she has ever really felt pretty.

Her Dad's take a picture (read: pictures – hundreds) because its her first party, and honestly they were getting a little worried about her. She excels in school, has the voice of an angel and dances beautifully, but she's never once had any friends round for dinner.

They drop her off at ten past eleven, because she demands that she wants to be fashionably late, and because she is there little princess, they oblige.

She goes to ring the bell, but notices there's a little gate to the side of the house, and decides to go through there instead. She pushes it open and is greeted by the sight of girls and boys everywhere, playing in the pool, sitting around and chasing each other. She smiles brightly and decides to make her way up to Quinn, to thank her for letting her come. She only makes it halfway to her sunlounger.

The laugh cuts through all the chatter and shrieks from everyone else, and all the kids turn to look at Quinn Fabray.

"What are you doing?" Her voice is silky smooth, but her words are grating.

"Noah invited me." Rachel smiles, and tries to fight the blush that is creeping into her cheeks.

"As a joke." Her smile falters and she looks at the ground.

"No one wants you here." This time it's Santana, Quinn's best friend.

Rachel wills herself not to cry, because she doesn't want to give them the satisfaction.

"Leave." Quinn practically snarls the world, and soon Rachel is stumbling as she tries to run away from the humiliating laughter of everyone in her year.

She can't bear the thought of going back and asking the Fabrays to use their phone, and anyway she doesn't want her Daddies to think she's a social outcast. Instead she waits on the curb until they come to pick her up several hours later.

Its the second time in his life that Puck feels genuinely ashamed. He almost goes over and sits with her, but Santana is tugging on his hand, so he sits with her instead.


Its the start of 8th grade now, and not much has changed. Quinn and Santana are cheerleaders now, though Rachel scoffs at their routines which consist of them jumping in the air and squealing, whilst waving pom poms. She has thrown herself into her extra curriculars, upping her intake of dance and vocal lessons, and become obsessed with escaping this town.

Rachel Berry had always wanted to be a star, and she'd never been ashamed of it. She had told everyone she met that she was going to be a famous singer one day and she'd always believed in that.

That all came tumbling down the first day of eighth grade. On her way to her locker she had run into Santana and Quinn, and even though she had kept her head down they had still seen her.

"Going somewhere?" Quinn had sneered, while Santana smirked behind her.

"My locker." Rachel had replied bravely, meeting Quinn's eyes.

"Whatever," Quinn and Santana had brushed past her when Quinn turned and smiled, "RuPaul."

She hadn't cried. That would have made it worse. She had stood statue still until the bell rang for lessons when she had disappeared into the toilets and cried.

Puck had watched this happen, but he hadn't said anything. Firstly because she was only Rachel Berry, and everyone knew she was a freak. And secondly because Santana had promised she'd have sex with him this weekend, and he really didn't want to piss her off.


By the time of middle school graduation, Quinn and her posse had come up with a whole host of names for Rachel, but Quinn mostly called her Manhands, while Santana's favourite was Treasure Trail. Most people referred to her as It, or freak. Rachel tried to pretend she didn't mind. She thought about calling Quinn something back, but she didn't want to make things worse. That didn't mean she didn't have a long list at home, stashed under her bed. She was a nice person but she wasn't a saint.

There was a party the day before graduation, a prom of sorts. All the popular kids were going in couples and mostly everyone else was just going with their friends. And Rachel was going alone.

She hadn't wanted to go, but her fathers had told her she should, because they were still determined that if she showed up to more school events she would fit in more. Rachel didn't want to tell them that everytime they dropped her off at a football game she ended up hiding in the toilets, so the mean girls couldn't get to her. She didn't want them to be disappointed with her.

Puck was going with Santana, who had given it up to him less than two weeks into the school year. Since then their volatile relationship had been the subject of much speculation, especially when all the other girls he'd had it on with came forward. But what could he do? He was a stud, he couldn't help it.

But he couldn't help himself but notice Rachel Berry, and he kinda admired her. For all the shit that everyone gave her, she never let it get to her, she just stood there and took it. Sometimes when people were being nasty to her, she would look over and catch his eye, almost daring him to do something. He always looked away.

Its the night of the party and everyones dancing, and stumbling a little. For most of them it was their first real experience with alcohol and none of them are handling it to well. Puck already caught Santana getting it on with a new blonde girl that just transferred it, and he saw Quinn Fabray kissing some guy under the bleachers. He's already had his fun before the dance, when Santana gave him a little something in exchange for him taking her to the dance. He's currently just scoping out the room, looking for a girl that so wasted she won't mind giving it up to him when he spots Rachel Berry running out the hall. Maybe its the alcohol, or maybe the years of repressed feelings but he follows her out.

She's crying by the dumpsters when he finds her, and her eye makeup is all smudged. She looks up when she hears him, and then looks away again.

"Go away Noah." She whispers softly, and he doesn't even mind that she isn't calling him by his nickname.

"Whats wrong?" He doesn't even know why he says it, because shit, its Berry and since when has he ever cared about her.

She shakes her head, and wipes her eyes.

"You don't care." She sniffles pathetically, and he's overcome with an urge to protect her.

"Try me." He surprises himself with his words and tone of voice, and Rachel looks up at him, as if she's seeing him for the first time.

"Everybody hates me." She states it, her eyes fixed on the ground, "They call me all sorts of horrible names, and push me and steal my things."

He looks away awkwardly because hes involved in that too sometimes.

"And I don't understand. I know I'm not normal, and I'm never going to be popular, but I try to be nice." She looks up at him, and she looks really good in that dress and in the darkness and he kind of wants to kiss her.

"I just want...one person to like me. That would be enough." And before he evens realises it, he's leant down and his lips are on hers, and she's not pulling away and he actually feels good. And suddenly her tongue is on his and it all feels so right. Their arms are around each other now, and all he can think is that she smells really good, and he kinda never wants to let go.

But then there's a slam of a door, and they jump apart, and she's looking up at him, and he wonders if she's going to cry, but she doesn't. She just smiles weakly and turns around and walks off toward the carpark.

He watches her go, and then heads back inside. Santana throws herself on him upon his return, and she's completely inebriated by now, and she's kissing him with such force that he wonders if she going to sleep with him twice in a day. But in the back of his mind he cant help but feel dejected, because the taste of Rachel on his lips is gone all too quickly.


She's been away the whole summer, travelling around Europe with her parents, and she hasn't spoken to Noah since the whole Dance thing. Graduation the next day was over as quickly as it started, and she spent most of the day celebrating with her dads. She wonders if it will have changed anything, if maybe he'll get people to lay off her, so that High School won't be a completely miserable experience for her.

Puck had spent the whole morning panicked. He'd been hanging out with some guys on the football team over summer, and they'd told him he would get a guaranteed place on the team if he passed one little test. They'd spent ages thinking of something for him to do and had eventually decided on picking on the Freshman Freak. This year that freak was Berry.

He really didn't want to do it. Not to her. But he really wanted on the team.

So when Rachel Berry stepped through the halls and saw Noah Puckerman she smiled brightly and hurried towards him. She didn't pay any attention to the drink in his hand, why would she?

So when she started talking at a hundred miles an hour, she was completely oblivious to the peculiar look on his face. She looked up after a moment and saw him swallow, she was just about to open her mouth and ask him what was the matter when it hit her. It was icy cold, and her whole face felt freezing and uncomfortable and her eyes were burning. She could feel the sticky substance seeping through her top, and into her bra.

This was far worse than any insult a cheerleader had ever hurled her way, because it was so humiliating and horrible. And it wasn't some mindless girl, it was Noah. Noah who had kissed her, and implied he had liked her. Noah, who she had spent all summer fantasising about. She rubbed the slushy out of her eyes, and looked up at him for a brief moment before turning and running to the nearest toilets.

She tried to block out the mocking laughter and the new batch of insults. She tried to ignore his face in her eyes, and the snide looks from the cheerleaders. She tried to forget every single dream she had had about Noah over the summer.

The day that Noah Puckerman threw a slushy over Rachel Berry was the first time she ever cried in front of her peers. She could handle the torment from everyone else, but not him. He had broken her.