I know this is a super-short update, but I wanted to give you guys a little something while I was on break. I hope you aren't disappointed!

Also, one of my favorite readers, SasuTenLuvr, created a drawing based on my fic! I'm terribly blessed having such amazing people reading my story. Here's the link to the picture! I know it's all I've been looking at since I first saw it! . gallery/#/d4tmm66 (take out the spaces between the deviantart and .com)

"Alice, I-"

"Put me down on the sofa, White," Alice said softly, cutting him off. She winced slightly as he picked her up to move her, but she refused to let herself show her pain any more than that.

"Alice, you don't have to pretend with me. I know how you're feeling," he said, putting her down gently on Hare's plush couch. God only knew what kind of debauchery had happened there between Hatter and Hare. He didn't want to think about it.

"But you don't, White," Alice said in a small voice. "You think you do. That's the problem."

White sat in stunned silence and waited for her to get her thoughts organized. She was mad at him, he knew that much. She tried to hide it from him, but he could hear it in his mind. He was pushing her away with the one thing that should have brought them closer together: their mind connection.

"May I say something?" he asked. His head was spinning and he wanted it to stop. Her thoughts quieted instantly as she turned her attention to him.

Yes, she thought, not bothering to even say the word aloud.

White winced. He wasn't sure that was a good thing or not.

"I know I've never been honest with you about my feelings. I've never said the words out loud. And I've acted like a prick lately just trying to get you to realize how I feel about you. This thing between me and Cheshire-"

"White," she said, cutting him off again, "you aren't a prick."

"Maybe so, but I've been behaving as such. I don't deserve you, Alice. I know that, but it doesn't stop my heart from feeling what I feel," he said. His chest heaved as he spoke, and he felt like his heart was aboard a ship caught in a terrible storm. He had never done it before, but it seemed like he had tuned out everything Alice was thinking. His own emotions were blinding him.

Alice reached up to him and brushed a tear from his cheek. White wasn't even aware he was crying.

He caught her hand in his and placed a gentle kiss in her palm.

"What are you trying to say?" she said, tilting her head so that her forehead was brushing his white-blond hair.

"Damn it, Alice, are you going to make me say it?" he shouted, frustrated and quite nearly emotionally spent.

Alice jerked her head back at his sudden outburst. She wasn't sure what was going on in his head. She never had known. Most of their journey, she was convinced he was just feeling guilty for putting her in danger. But then their kiss at the Turtle's...

"Can you leave me some of my pride?" he asked, his voice still quaking with emotion.

Moments later, when she knew White wasn't going to continue, Alice told him something she never thought she would ever reveal to him.

"I read your journal," she said.

His head snapped up, and he looked her directly in the eye. The hurt he felt, the betrayal, was palpable. It made Alice feel physically worse than she had been. She assumed she'd thought about it at some point so he'd have heard it in her thoughts. She assumed wrong.

"How could you?" he said, backing away from her. "How could you do that and still ask me to..."

"No, White! It was before I knew you!" Alice said desperately to his retreating figure. He was moving closer and closer to the cottage door, and farther and farther away from her.

"Don't," he said, his voice shaking. With what, Alice couldn't decide. Anger? Hurt? Sadness? He held up his finger to her, stopping her from continuing. He moved away in silence. "You don't get to do that."

"What happened to-"

"No!" White said, cutting her off. "Do you have any idea what you've done? This entire time I've been thinking about what a total asshat I've been, not telling you. And you knew! You've known this whole time and you still chose to be close to him," he spat.

His tears were flowing freely now. He felt like his whole universe was imploding, and he saw nothing but white. He felt behind him for the doorknob and found it. He was going to walk out on her, the girl that he loved. Or used to love. His heart was pulling him in so many directions, he wasn't sure what he felt anymore.

"White, don't go!" she pleaded. He wasn't sure why she was doing that. She obviously had no regard for his feelings at all.

"Alice," he said as evenly as he could, "what you did was unforgivable." With that, he opened the door, walked out, and slammed it behind him.