Their First Date


Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or its subsequent plots or characters.

Summary: When Naruto finally asks Hinata out, her teammates and cousin get very preoccupied with keeping the blond hero from doing anything perverted to the young heiress. Everyone seems to be trying to keep Naruto from doing that, from her grandfather to her… to her sister? From threats to stalkers, how do Hinata and Naruto manage to get through their date? O_o.

Note: So, because I update very poorly and irregularly, I decided to write a short story about Naruto and Hinata's first date. It is meant to be humorous, but I don't know if I captured that very well. It was going to be one chapter but I figured it'd be too long, so now, it is multiple.

It was getting late and the rain was getting heavier. The dark tavern was mostly empty, save four young adults who wore dark, nondescript clothing. They sat in a corner booth, hidden from prying eyes, drinking tea and talking lowly amongst themselves. The lone female of the group, a rosette, sat before the three young men with her, blowing out a puff of air in annoyance. Honestly, when they'd first requested an audience with her, she'd had to check her 'what the fuck' reaction. That reaction was stronger than ever right now.

Sakura rubbed her forehead in frustration and confusion. She'd never pegged the three men before her as annoying, but that's the word she'd use for them at this exact moment. They weren't being straightforward and their request sounded too strange to even attempt to comprehend without explanation.

"So let me see if I got this right, you guys." Sakura paused and looked at the three young men sitting before her. They were an odd group for sure, as none of them particularly liked each other or talked to her, but the three of them were united by their common goal to "protect" Hinata Hyuga. They all stared at her earnestly, nursing their cups of tea and glancing around hastily before returning their gaze to the pink haired kunoichi before them.

"You, Shino, and Neji want me to beat the crap out of Naruto. You just want me to waltz up to him and break his bones? Why? There is no reason why, is there?" She finished questioningly, staring at the most talkative member of the trio, Kiba.

Neji scoffed at the last part and replied "There is a very good reason why. You are aware that Naruto asked out Hinata-sama last week, right?" He scowled and waited for Sakura's answer.

Sakura nodded happily and answered "Yup, I sure am. Poor girl passed out, as I heard it. It's all everyone's been talking about for the past few days. Even Kakashi-sensei has offered in his two cents." She giggled, and then asked suspiciously "Why? Is that a problem for you three?"

Quietly, Shino answered "It wouldn't be but…" He didn't finish his statement, but touched his glasses on the tip of his nose, before coughing quietly.

Annoyed and feeling protective of Naruto, Sakura prodded "But what? Because she loves Naruto, and he likes her so don't you three get any crazy ideas about keeping them apa—"

"Ugh! We don't want to keep them apart! We just want to keep her safe." Neji interrupted quietly.

"Keep her safe? From our village's hero?" Sakura asked disbelievingly. She glanced at Neji's worried face and laughed heartily, slamming her fists on the table with humor. The fact that they thought Naruto would hurt Hinata was too amusing to ignore. Honestly, what could they be on? With tears of laughter in her eyes she asked "What could Naruto possibly do that warrants so much suspicion from you three?"

Kiba scowled and replied "He's a damn pervert, Sakura. Perverts do weird things to innocent young girls. They do sneaky things to innocent young girls. So, we want insurance that he won't try anything weird or sneaky on her. You're that insurance." He paused.

Sakura laughed and said "Okay, I'll give you that. He is a little perverted. But Hinata is hardly an innocent young girl. She's 17, not 12. She'll let Naruto go as far as she's comfortable with and he'll re—"

Neji burst "The hell if Hinata will let Naruto go any further than hold her hand. I'll be damnedif—" Upset by the possibilities, Neji said nothing further, but gritted his teeth and hardened his jaw.

Kiba continued Neji's outburst. "We'll be damned if we let Naruto take advantage of her meekness. He won't be having his way with—"

"'Having his way' with her? You three are being ridiculous. He's not going to jump her bones! He's no less innocent than her in that regard! They're just going to see a movie and get some food! Geez!" Sakura finished, exasperated with the three guys in front of her. Still, she smiled. Seeing Neji act like an overprotective brother was downright amusing, and very cute. His anger was palpable and a lesser woman would've been terrified of the death glare he was giving her. As it was, Sakura was just amused.

She smiled and continued "Besides, what do I have to do with anything? How can I make sure Naruto "behaves"?"

Kiba smiled wolfishly and responded "Naruto's scared shitless of you. So, we figured, if you threaten him, he'll keep inappropriate advances to himself, or at least, to a minimum."

Sakura considered that and laughed. "Okay, yeah, you have a point, but Naruto's not that stupid. He wou—"

Neji glared at Sakura, and commented "Naruto's 'not that stupid'? On what planet is he 'not that stupid'? He never even saw Hinata's feelings for him, despite how obvious they were to everyone else, and he—"

"Yeah! And Hinata damn near had to kill herself in order for it finally to sink into his thick ass skull, so don't try to tell us that he isn—"

"Okay! Okay! You're right; he's denser than most people. But he knows how Hinata is, he wouldn't do anything to make her uncomfortable, you guys. He's not mean, you know. Besides, why would I threaten Naruto like that? He's my best friend." Sakura said, interrupting Kiba's oncoming tirade.

Neji and Kiba looked at each other, while Shino folded his arms. This was going to be the sticky part, seeing as what they were going to offer her could get them all locked up.

Kiba answered "Because, we don't even really need you to hit him, just insert the threat of your violence before their date tomorrow. Since when do you need a reason to threaten Naruto anyway? But if that's not a good enough explanation… we'll give you something you want in return. Something that you want very badly." He paused and let Sakura stew on that for a moment.

Her left eyebrow rose slightly. "Oh, really? What could you possibly have that I would want?" She folded her hands and leaned her elbows on the small table before them, her tea long forgotten. She stared at the three guys sitting before her, awaiting their answer curiously. Neji grimaced, while Kiba smiled viciously. Shino avoided her gaze and sat apart from Kiba and Neji. His attitude suggested that he was not in agreement with what Kiba was about to offer her.

Smiling triumphantly, knowing he was going to offer her the one thing she wouldn't refuse, Kiba gazed into Sakura's emerald green eyes and whispered softly, "Sasuke Uchiha's whereabouts inside the village." Both Neji and Shino flinched as if they'd been hit. That information was highly classified, and revealing to Sakura was downright wrong, but they knew it was the only way she'd agree.

Sakura gasped. Her eyes widened as she tore her gaze between the trio trying to gauge their expressions for any hint of untruthfulness. She found none, only guilt and uncertainty in Neji's face. Shino refused to meet her gaze. They appeared to be telling her the truth but still she refused to believe them. She slammed her fist on the table in front of her causing her tea to drop to the floor with a crash.

In a dangerously low, but excited voice she said "You lie! No one except Tsunade-shishou and a few trusted individuals know where she put Sasuke to serve his…. sentence. She refused to even mention Sasuke-kun to Naruto, Kakashi-sensei and me. You expect me to believe that you three know where Sasuke-kun is." She finished derisively.

"Uh, HELLO, you are looking at three tracker ninja, remember? That's Team Kurenai's specialty. Neji just happens to have similar abilities as Hinata. But yeah, we know where your precious Sasuke-kun is, and if you do this for us, we'll tell you where he is and how to get to him. What you do from there is up to you, BUT, you can't tell anyone else. If anyone found out, it'd certainly get back to Tsunade–sama and we're not trying to get into trouble over this bullsh—"

"I'll do it. I'll tell him whatever you want me to. You can use my name to strike fear into Naruto in order to protect Hinata." Sakura interrupted Kiba heatedly.

Kiba smiled, having expected her answer. He started to rise. "It's settled then."

Sakura glanced up and told him "Not quite. I can't keep this from Naruto. He wants to see Sasuke-kun even more than I do. I won't tell anyone else, but I refuse to keep this from him, considering how I'm getting the information. It would be cruel and I'd feel like I'm betraying my best friend. I refuse to do that. So I'll do what you want, but I'm telling Naruto."

Neji scowled and said "….I suppose that would be acceptable. But only Naruto. Sai nor Kakashi nor Yamato need to ever know about this. So you go threaten Naruto like usual and leave the rest up to us. You'll know Sasuke's whereabouts by tomorrow night. Understood?"

Sakura nodded. She did understand, and right now she was more anxious to go find Naruto so she could be one step closer to finding Sasuke. Standing, she tossed some money onto the table for the tea and cups, and then proceeded to rush out of the tavern to her friend's house. Her annoyance with the trio she'd left behind was gone; in its place was gratitude.

Suddenly, threatening Naruto didn't seem so bad at all.

So, there goes the first chapter. :-D. Please read and review and tell me what you think so far. I know it's not funny, but that should get better soon. Thanks! Enjoy!