Disclaimer: Again I don't own Star Wars nor (I like that word "nor") am I making any money off of this.
You've reached Luke Skywalker aka Hero of the Rebellion, First of the "new" Jedi, or if you're talking to Mara Farmboy or SKYWALKER! I am not able to take your call because I'm either trying to talk Mara into taking Jedi training, training future Jedi, or saving the New Republic from certain doom. I will get back to you as soon as poss- What was that Leia; Chewies stuck in a well? Time to save the day again…
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I know for a fact that Chewie wasn't stuck in a well. You know kid nobody likes your Lassie jokes!
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You know Luke, happy I used your first name, you don't have to be so modest on this recording, yes that was sarcasm, and how many times do I have to tell you that I don't want to go to your stupid Jedi School!
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Why did you have to use me for your corny Lassie joke? I mean Han would make much more sense! He is always around that walking carpet, as much as love Chewbacca he is still a walking carpet! But that's really not why I called I wanted to know if you could, as you kindly put it, "Save the New Republic from certain doom"? Thanks
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Aaarrrggg
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Chewie realized that you couldn't understand him in the last message, that's one thing you and your Jedi powers can't do! He said that he would never get stuck in a well so stop it with the Lassie jokes!
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Hey Luke its Wedge I'm just letting you know that if you see Wes do not ask him about his new girlfriend because trust me you do not want to know!
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Luke wanna hear about my new girlfriend? I know Wedge probably told you that you don't want to know but trust me it's not as bad it seems!
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How do you spell desperate? W-E-S! Get it; because Wes's new girlfriend could make Jabba the Hutt look desirable!
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Farmboy don't trust you old squadron. Wes's new girlfriend isn't really THAT bad. I mean sure she isn't the prettiest person but she is very nice person. And no I'm not just saying that because Wes paid me to I really mean it!
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I thought I told Mara to not say anything about our agreement. Leave it to Mara to find a loophole.
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Luke will you please tell Wes that just because he has a very unattractive girlfriend that he doesn't have to tease me about not being able to levitate anything! I mean what does his girlfriend have to do with my force capabilities?
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I for one am not calling you about Wes's hideous girlfriend. I was just wondering if you had seen Wedge. He didn't come home last night and, like you, isn't answering!
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Luke have you seen Leia anywhere? She left this morning and hasn't come back since. I hope she's not cheating on me with Wedge because he is MIA too; I'm sure that the fact there both missing is a coincidence but I can still have my worries! Give me a call if you hear from her.
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Sorry Luke I was up all night doing things for the Senate. Please tell my ignorant husband that I would never cheat on him; especially not with Wedge! Better yet I'll send Mara to tell him; it will be more fun to watch anyway.
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Oh Skywalker you should have seen the look on Han's face after what I did to him. It was hilarious!
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Luke why did you let your sister set Mara loose on me? Geez you know a guy for what, well I don't know exactly how long but still it been a while! Anyway you shouldn't have allowed her to do that; you could've been like "Leia don't do that it's not the Jedi way!" You always say that anyway so why couldn't you tell HER that?
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Ok Luke this is getting scary; Wedge STILL hasn't come home…maybe Han was right; maybe he is cheating on me!
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Would you please tell Iella that Wedge is not cheating on him! I just found out that he was on some secret mission for the New Republic; why it was a secret I don't know. Also I think I would have been better at it; I just think they don't like my new girlfriend, obviously nobody does, but they shouldn't hold it against me!
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Hey Luke I'm back. Thanks for letting Iella freak out like that. I mean that's what friends are for right!
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Hey Luke guess who it is? It's the person who the force has left so I just stole someone elses body, but who you loved anyway, but still had the nerve to go off and leave you waiting never to return again!
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Hello Jedi-Master Skywalker I am calling on the benefit of the rest of the empire, well whats left of it, to ask you politely if we could rule the galaxy again. I know this sounds strange but we thought that since you're a Jedi that you'd want to have peace, well this is the only way- what was that? Yes I guess you could destroy us completely but don't tell him that! Wait I just did? Great never mind Master Skywalker; don't ruin us completely. Long Live the Empire!
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A/N: Well that was Chapter 2! Please review and what not :)