9Disclaimer: Bleach, Kubo's. Fiction, mine.
Summary: Shopping invitation gone wrong.
Author's notes: ShiYori, ShinHiyo, anything you call 'em. Took like 30 mins for this one. I'm not sure if I made anyone OOC, but if I do/did, please tell me. And if anyone has any requests/prompts for this pairing, just drop me an email. ^^
Warning: The usual.
"Hey baldy."
She stared at him piercingly, her eyes sharp like a hawk. Her face was void of any humor in it, so Shinji knew it was something serious.
Probably a touchy subject, even.
"Aah? Whaddaya need me for, Hiyori?"
He barely spared her a sideways glance, obviously unaffected by her sudden uninvited appearance into his room, before turning back to the mirror, adjusting yet another obnoxious necktie at the collar of his shirt.
"We're gonna go shopping."
Shinji's eyes widened for a second, quite taken aback by her sudden invitation.
"Is this a date, cus if yer askin' me to go out wit'cha I th-"
One swing of her sword to his backside did the job; he shut his mouth quickly, and he gave a little yelp as he turned sharply in her direction. Hiyori glanced at her sword. She thought it was efficient, just as her flip-flops was.
Or perhaps the sword was slightly more efficient.
"The Hell was that for? Ya know ya coulda just slap m-"
"My flip-flops are goners, dumbass."
He blinked his bead-like eyes in response to the sudden revelation, momentarily processing the newly acquired information that Hiyori had just given to him. He stared at her feet, and saw that he couldn't see any resemblance of her usually bare feet.
She was wearing shoes for once!
"Whose sneakers are those?" he questioned, a quizzical look plastered on his already ridiculous face. Hiyori grunted before answering:
"Lisa's old ones. Said I could have 'em till I get a new pair of flip-flops." A pause. "Why the Hell are you asking so many questions anyway? I said we're goin' shopping didn't I?!"
Shinji rolled his eyes, turned to the mirror once again, giving his necktie a final touch-up before turning to look Hiyori in the eyes again.
"Ya know, ya sure are a rude monkey, considerin' ya need my help," he commented offhandedly, grinning all the while. Hiyori considered beating him to a pulp right then and there, but knowing that she needed him to take her to the stores, decided against it.
"Shut up, you dumbass. I'm just returning the favor anyways," she retorted finally, hands crossed across her chest.
"Yeah fine, now let's get outta my room."
They walked down the stairs side by side, all the while throwing names at each other.
"How's my necktie? Lookin' good?"
He knew she'd come up with an insult as an answer; always had and always will be.
"You look even more ridiculous with that on."
He knew she derives enjoyment from abusing him, either verbally or physically. Wait, that sounded wrong.
"Aw Hiyori, ya don't needa complimen' me so much!"
"Fuck off, stupid baldy. I said you look ugly as fuck!"
Love noticed them as they descended, blissfully oblivious to the heated verbal war going on between them. No, more like used to their daily verbal assaults.
"You guys going somewhere?"
Shinji jerked his thumb in Hiyori's direction as a signal.
"Monkey says she needs a new pair of flip-flops."
Hiyori planted a quick punch at his exposed rib, and grunted. Shinji clutched at his recently injured side, cursing under his breath.
"Fucking baldy screwed up my flip-flops, so I'm making him buy me a new pair."
Shinji stared at her in disbelief.
"What the Hell? How is it my fault?"
Love looked at them. "It's your nose, Shinji."
"Wha?"
For a moment both had a dumbfounded look on their faces, seemingly at a loss at Love's little speech.
"What does the baldy's nose had anythin' to do with it?" demanded Hiyori, clearly getting annoyed at the fact that her buying a new pair of sandals had anything to do with the dumbass with a cropped golden mane for hairstyle.
Love raised an eyebrow, as if that was enough a reply to Hiyori's question. She blinked her eyes once, twice. Shinji on the other hand, continued to stare at him, still somehow confused. When he realized that the duo was still struggling to understand his point, Love sighed.
"Hiyori has her flip-flops making out with your nose every damn time," Love continued squarely, his face indifferent. Clear, crisp understanding dawned on Shinji's face.
Shinji sighed, turning to look at Hiyori standing next to him. "Pfft, ya know Love, if she wanted ta make out wit' me so bad, she need only ask."
And his nose met one Hell of a more tragic fate that day, as Hiyori pummeled him face first to the ground with a punch, and using her sword, continued to hit his nose blue and black all over, all the time yelling almost hysterically:
"Wh-why the fuck would I wanna make out with you, fucking dumbass?!"
It was a nasty nose-job, and it took Shinji all his strength not to cry and wince in pain as Hachi attended to his badly abused nose.
Author's thanks: Thanks for reading, people! To pixiedustchoco, thanks for reading, review and the Fav! I appreciate it. :D