Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any of its characters. They all belong to Stephenie Meyer.
Thanks to my prereaders and my beta.
A/N: So, here's the promised outtake/side-shot. Hope it takes the sting of the final chapters away a bit. ;)
I probably came around here way too much, but I couldn't help it. I just couldn't bear the thought of leaving my girls. If I had known that day that it would be the last time I spoke to Bella, I would have said so much to her. I would have told her how much I loved her, how much I needed her. I would have told her how much I was looking forward to our daughter being born. I wouldn't have let her read it in a letter.
I could hear every word they said to me in the hospital. I was there as Bella stayed so long that my mom and dad forced her to go home for the baby's sake. I was there as she read to me from the parenthood books. I stood in the same room with my entire family as they told me goodbye. All I wanted to do was reach out and hug every one of them and tell them I was there and that I was fine.
But I couldn't because I wasn't technically there. I was gone on impact. My body was fighting to stay there with them, but my spirit just let it all go. In part, I think it was my mind that didn't want to leave yet. I saw how much Bella begged me to stay and I couldn't bear the thought of disappointing her again. I held on as long as I could... until the moment she told me it was okay to go.
After I was gone, the nights were the hardest for Bella. She'd lie on the bed, her hands rubbing her growing belly as she stared at the picture of me she kept on the side table. When she would finally drift off, she would wake up countless times screaming my name, begging me not to leave her and there was nothing I could do. All I wanted to do was pull my wife into my arms and tell her everything would be okay, but I was stuck watching.
My family tried to be there as much as they could for her, but she wanted to be strong. Instead of moving in with my parents like I wish she would have so she wouldn't be alone, she came home to our apartment. When they came over, she would smile and act like everything was okay until they left. The moment they were gone she would break down on the spot, slide to the floor and sob.
I was there the day Bella went into labor. I was there when our daughter was delivered. Carlisle reminded them all that I was there in spirit and he was right. If I could have cried and hugged Rose when she spoke of my family standing in for me, I would have.
And when Bella announced to our family that our daughter's name was Bethany Marie, I would have cried again. It meant so much to me that she used the name I'd mentioned to her in the note. She'd always carry with her the name her daddy had chosen for her.
I'm mostly here today for Bella because I know it's going to be a hard day for her. It will be the first wedding anniversary that I'm not here for. If I know our family, they'll try to be there for her. But if I know my wife, she'll try to be brave and handle it on her own.
I walked into the living room and saw Bella sitting on the sofa. The baby monitor sat off to the side, the sounds of our daughter's quiet breathing filled the air. In her lap, she held the album filled with our wedding photos. Just as she was about to open it, the phone rang.
"Hello?" she answered quietly. I knew it was my sister on the line. I'd been with her earlier and she mentioned to Jasper that she was going to invite Bella and Bethany over for dinner.
"Hi, Bella. What are you up to?" she casually asked. I knew though that Bella wasn't stupid. She knew why my sister was calling.
"Nothing much, Alice. What can I do for you?" she replied.
"I was just wondering if you and Bethany would like to come over and eat dinner with us tonight?" Alice asked her. Bella closed her eyes as tears streamed down her face.
"Don't do this, sweetheart," I whispered. "Not today. Let them help you, please." I longed to reach out and touch her, just to let her know I was here with her.
"Not tonight, Alice. I just need some time alone," she said. Once they'd finished their short conversation, Bella picked the album back up and began looking through the pictures. She'd lovingly run her finger across my face as she sang quietly.
"I have died everyday waiting for you.
Darling, don't be afraid, I have loved you
For a thousand years.
I'll love you for a thousand more.
And all along I believed I would find you
Time has brought your heart to me
I have loved you for a thousand years
I'll love you for a thousand more."
I walked out quietly and made my way to Bethany's room. I could tell that her breathing had changed and that she would wake up soon.
When I wasn't with Bella I was with Bethany. Even at her young age, she was always smiling. I'd taken to singing to her at night so she wouldn't wake up her mom. Her favorite seemed to be "You Are My Sunshine." Bella couldn't figure out why Bethany loved the song already, but I knew it was because her daddy sang it to her.
When I walked in, her bright green eyes were already open and looking around the room. I stepped over and looked into the crib at her and she smiled widely. Bethany had always been able to see me. It made me wonder about all the times I'd seen babies smiling at nothing if there was actually someone there.
I tried my best to keep Bethany from crying, but after a bit she got frustrated with the fact that I wasn't picking her up and began to cry. I stepped to the side as Bella quickly came in and picked our daughter up.
Bella continued singing the song she'd been singing in the living room as she settled them down in the rocker. I stood off to the side and watched my wife hold our daughter and longed to wrap my arms around them both and never let go.
"What is it, Sweetheart?" Bella asked her as she tried to calm the baby. Bethany continued to cry and squirm and I saw Bella smile slightly. Then she began to sing.
"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine.
You make me happy, when skies are gray.
You'll never know dear, how much I love you.
Please don't take my sunshine away."
As Bella started the song a second time I joined in with her and we both sang until she drifted off to sleep. The room was quiet until Bella spoke.
"I miss you so much, Edward," she said.
"I miss you too, baby," I said, wishing she could hear me.
"But I can feel you here with us... watching over us. People would think I was crazy if I told them, but I know it's true. I love you," she said, quietly.
"I love you, too," I said before I slowly backed out of the room. I'd watch over them as long as I could, but I know they'll be okay.
A/N: Hope you liked it. This outtake/side-shot came to me the first time I listened to the Breaking Dawn soundtrack. :)