If Only, If Only
Summary: Be careful what you wish for. When you're a wizard, you have no idea which ones will come true and you may not like it when they do. DHr, HrR, HP, DG, SM, BL
(A/N Okay, this is primarily a Harry/Pansy story and the greater majority of it will be told by Harry. Also, the inspiration came from a picture by DCKissner by the same title. If you want to see the pic, let me know and I'll post a link on my author page. Hope you all like it.)
"This has to be some kind of a nightmare," Harry said, staring at the scene before him.
"Sure it is," Ron said, his face buried in his breakfast.
Harry looked at his friend who was focused with sole intent on his food. Harry returned his attention to the scene before him, gazing at it with a sort of detached horror.
He had been surprised when Draco Malfoy came over to the Gryffindor table to sit for breakfast. He'd been floored when Hermione took a seat on Malfoy's lap and began snogging him silly.
"Ron, I think we need to have a talk," Harry said. He could anticipate the explosion to come from his friend and wanted to head if off as soon as possible. He looked at Ginny who was sitting beside Ron. She was staring at Hermione and Malfoy with a look halfway between disgust and betrayal.
She looked over and caught Harry's gaze. Harry jerked his head towards Ron then looked at the snog fest that was taking place at the end of the table.
With her usual sixth sense for these things, Ginny caught his meaning right away.
Ron finally looked up from his food and then down at his feet.
"Ginny? Why did you just bind me to the chair?" he asked, glancing up at her.
Unfortunately, just beyond Ginny was the spectacle of inter-house unity. Which happened to be the next thing Ron noticed.
The following segment of Ron's life would have been hilarious if you were watching from a safe distance. Ginny and Harry were not at a safe distance and so they were slightly afraid for their lives.
First Ron's jaw dropped. He stared at Hermione and Malfoy, his face going pale.
Then, in a very calm, very controlled voice, he asked "Harry? Mate? Would you do me a favor?"
"I need you to hit me, very hard."
"Why do you want him to hit you?" Ginny asked in her best psychiatrist voice.
"Because I had better be dreaming," Ron said, the control slipping from his tone.
Harry looked at Ginny. She shrugged and turned, slapping her brother across his face.
Ron gasped and swore. "Damn, Ginny! I asked Harry to hit me!"
"Why's that?" Harry asked, curious despite himself.
"Because my sister hits like a horse," Ron said. Sure enough, a bruise was forming on his cheek.
Ron looked past his sister again and now the color drained from his face. "I'm not dreaming."
Now he fainted.
"Well, that was interesting," Ginny said, looking down at her brother where he lay, half tied to the chair, and half slumped over.
"We should do something about him," Harry said.
"I quite agree, Mr. Potter."
Harry turned in surprise to stare at Snape. The Potions master was looking at Hermione and Malfoy with thinly veiled annoyance.
"Miss Weasley, please take your brother to the Hospital Wing. Mr. Potter, you and I need to talk."
Ginny looked between the two of them then pointed her wand at her brother. A few charms later, she left the Great Hall with her brother suspended before her.
"Come, Mr. Potter," Snape said.
Harry slipped his hand in his pocket to finger his wand but followed the professor.
To Harry's relief, Snape led him to a well lit corridor then into the Transfiguration room. In there, Harry was surprised to see Professor McGonagall and three other students. He recognized Luna Lovegood. The other two were Slytherins and Harry knew them by sight but not by name.
"Mr. Potter, you know Luna Lovegood," McGonagall said. "This is Blaise Zabini and Pansy Parkinson. They are...concerned like you."
Snape pushed Harry into a seat and went to loom behind McGonagall. "This situation with Miss Granger and Mr. Malfoy is a very serious one," Snape said. "It must be remedied."
"You'd do anything to stop inter-house unity, wouldn't you?" Harry said drily.
Snape fixed him with a glare. "Contrary to popular belief, Mr. Potter, I am all in favor of inter-house unity."
As he said that, he put his hand on McGonagall's shoulder. For the second time that day, Harry had to quell the urge to vomit.
"However," Snape began, taking his hand off the Transfiguration Professor's shoulder. "I do not approve of Miss Granger and Mr. Malfoy."
"Why not?" Luna asked in her singsong voice.
"It doesn't feel natural," Blaise chimed in.
The words suddenly spurred a memory in Harry. He felt his jaw drop.
"Mr. Potter?" Snape drawled. "Would you care to stop looking like a very stupid fish and tell us why you are looking like a very stupid fish?"
"I...I caused this," he stuttered.
(A/N: That's right my lovelies. Instead of being the good author, I'm giving you a new story! I was gonna update TLAPIAT, but then I realized I didn't have that chapter finished. I'm awesome like that. Well, rather than make you guys wait forever without any word, I figured I'd update you all on where I am. TLAPIAT should be updated Monday and updates should proceed normally after that. In any case, hope you like this new story.