April 5

Dear Diary,

Oh wow, this really does feel weird. I don't know if I'm going to get the hang of this – even writing that feels strange.


Today was a surprisingly okay day. I had to go visit my Grandma and Grandpa after school and usually everyone my age is like 'oh my god I hate spending time with my family they're so boring I want to die' but I freaking love my Grandma. She's great.

We spent the day looking through all her old diaries. She kept them so that she could reminisce and show her grandchildren what a wild child she used to be. She wrote them for like four years throughout her late teens and it was so interesting and cute to read all of the crazy shit my Grandma used to get up to. I never thought of her as some naughty teenager who snuck out of the house in the middle of the night to go visit her boyfriend (my Grandpa) to make out in the woods. If you saw her now you would never believe that these funny tales once belonged to her. When she went into a bit too much detail about how yummy Grandpa was it got a bit sickening, but it was truly so wonderful. And then she gave me this cute little navy notebook. That's you. And so I have been inspired to keep a diary of my own. And one day when I'm old and wrinkly like Granny Anne, I'll show my grandchildren and they'll be blown away by how much I've changed.

Mom says it'll be good so I can get my emotions out and then hopefully I won't be so negative. I don't know what she means.

The only problem is, while writing this, I've realised that I'm not a wild child. I am nothing like a wild child. Once, I thought I was, but then I realised that reading a book with a flashlight under my covers when I was supposed to be asleep wasn't very rock and roll at all, so I've settled that I'm a bit boring. And when I'm old and don't do a lot I'll probably pick up this little navy diary and realise that I haven't even changed one bit. I don't have saucy tails to tell about my hot boyfriend because I don't have one, and haven't had one for quite some time, but I don't dwell on that.

I don't really do much. But how can you blame me? This is La Push. What else is there to do? Go for a walk through the woods or sit on the damp sand of the beach. Maybe even jump off the cliff into the sea – apart from it's about ten degrees in the water and I'm far too chicken to ever do something like that.

All there really is around here is school and going round a friend's house, or maybe at the weekend you're lucky enough to catch a ride down to Port Angeles. But that's not too often. And school truly sucks. I'm a bit of a geek in that I like to learn things, but I can't stand school. I can't stand the teachers of even the other pupils. I mean, my friends are great and there are few others I talk to but… it just gets a bit tedious. Oh well, one more year to go. I can't to get out of there.

Like, today. What happened today? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. I got up at the exact same time as usual, chucked my clothes on, chucked my hair up, spent the whole day bored and that was it, the only good thing was visiting my grand mother, and that doesn't tend to be thought of as exciting.

Oh no, I lied. Something was a bit different.

We had a presentation in Biology. I stuttered on a word and everyone laughed. I then spent the whole day trying to convince myself that nobody would remember, or even care. I'm still pretty mortified.

Nonetheless, I promised Granny Anne that I would do this, even if all I write is what I've had for lunch. Hopefully, I'll find more interesting things to write about. I owe it to my future self and my future grandchildren – if I even have any. I hope so. I'm definitely not the sort that wants to be a teen mom but I know when I'm older I'd really love to have children. I dunno. It just might not ever happen. I might not find anyone who wants to marry me, let alone have children with me. I could always adopt. Although Mom said being a single mom was tough as hell before she met Scott.

Oh well, I'm sure everything will be fine. Even if I end up filling these pages with boring, thoughtless ramblings.

I googled diary writing and apparently quite a lot of people still do it… I didn't think anyone really did. Apparently it's therapeutic. I don't know about that but I did learn that I need to find a very safe place to hide it. Apparently, under the mattress is far too obvious. Maybe my underwear draw. At least them Jason won't find it. My god, if my brother ever found out I was writing a diary… I'd be dead. I'd have to die. He would not live until he could make fun of every single word in this. He would torment me until the day I die.

So, as a first entry I'm pretty sure this is the lamest one in the histories of diary writing, but I owe it my Grandma to keep at it. At least until she forgets she gave me it; her memory is getting quite bad lately.

I hope I haven't bored my future self and my future grandchildren too much. I probably won't be writing in this every day, but I'll try and remember to do it sometime. I'll wait until I come up with something worthwhile to say.

Kim Conweller.

P.S. I'm going on a diet tomorrow. I wanted to put it down in writing so that I would stick to it. I will become fit and healthy and beautiful. Maybe then I would find a boyfriend who wants to marry me and father my children.

AN: Okay! This is the start to my new story. I wanted to write something a bit different and I had the idea of writing it like a diary, so I decided to just go with it - it might work and it might not, so I'd really appreciate feedback :)

I've had a poll up on my profile about which pairing I should write about next and for a while it was Kim and Jared, although I know now it's not the highest ranking anymore. I have quite a few of the chapters written already so I should be able to update quite regularly for a while. I've really enjoyed writing this so far so hopefully I'll get more written soon as well - although I have to say I'm still struggling with the whole name thing, considering my actual name is Kim. It's so weird.

Each chapter will vary in length, purely depending on how much there is to write about. Usually I will always try and make each chapter around 7000 words but I think that it would be more realistic if they're short one day and long the next, as that's what it would be like if you're really writing a diary. Although if a chapter is very short then I'll make sure I post the next one soon after so it's not completely pointless.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this!

Disclaimer: I do not own the idea to this story, I'm merely taking a small part of the book that mentioned Kim and Jared and running with it.