Rachel, how could you?

After everything you and I have been through together, you went and cheated on me with Puck? Puck of all people, Rach, you know what happened with Quinn fucked me up. And you just made it so much fucking worse. I loved you so much, and you just went and played with me like I was some fucking toy. You know what? No, not anymore. I'm done with you, Rachel. And to show you that I mean it, I'm gonna tell you about that summer night when you and I were in the woods alone. Just to prove to you that I don't care anymore about what we used to have.

Remember that, Rach? Remember when I took you on that little camping trip? Or did you block that out when you made out with my best friend? Anyway, I remember it very clearly, driving over and picking you up and throwing you in the passenger seat with me. And then I took your stuff and put it in the back with my stuff. And you were telling me how excited you were to be going on your first camping trip, and then I kissed you and told you it was gonna be so much fun, and you smiled and you took my hand and agreed. Then we drove away and I felt like the main character of those sappy Hallmark movies that got to take his woman wherever he wanted and they would just walk into the sunset happily ever after. You made us seem so unreal, Rachel. Being with you was like a dream; it was too good to be true.

So whatever, anyway, we got to the campsite and you started freaking out because of all the bugs and stuff, and then you saw something I still don't know what and you screamed and you just clung to me and you were almost crying, and you were going on about how terrifying the woods were and how we shouldn't have gone. And I told you how adorable you were, and you just gave me this death glare thing. But I laughed and eventually you laughed too. I had to let go of you for at least a little while, because I had to set up our tent, and I remember I kept screwing up and you kept coming over and kissing me to make me feel better and it always did. I wonder if you did that for Puck too.

And eventually the tent was done, but it was so small. So you said it was perfect for you, but then I reminded you that we had to stay in the tent together and you blushed and so did I. And the crickets started chirping a lot and the fireflies were coming out and you just stood there. You stood there and looked at everything, and you came over to me and hugged me, saying something about how big everything seemed, and I laughed because I thought of myself as something big you would see every day. Then we both crawled inside that tent and played hand games that you wanted to play, and I think we did some truth or dare, too. You found out some of my deepest secrets.

But I found out some of yours too, and I specifically remember you falling into my lap because you laughed so hard at the fact that I was sprayed by a skunk in the first grade and came into school smelling like something died. Somehow, from there, you made your way on top of me, and you kissed me, and we were lying down, making out. I remember your hands tangled in my hair and mine in yours, and we just screwed around. But no sex, because you were gonna wait until you were 25. I remember you feeling so perfect against meā€¦like you were meant to be my other half. I remember thinking that we were going to be together forever. Jesus Christ was I wrong.

So yeah, we ate some dinner and then decided to lie down outside and watch the stars. You kept talking about the big dipper, and I smiled and nudged you, saying that I would be your big dipper and you were my little dipper. You laughed and kissed my nose, and then we began making out again and I don't remember ever kissing anyone else like that in my life, ever. You whispered you loved me, and I told you I loved you too. And I did. And I carried you back to the tent, while you kicked a little bit. But then we got our sleeping bags out, and the first thing you wanted to do was cuddle. To be honest, that's all I wanted too. So I let you inside my big sleeping bag, and we cuddled and I kissed your forehead. And we fell asleep like that, with my arms around you. That was the best camping trip of my life.

Alright, so maybe I'm not over you yet. But trust me, I will be soon, and when I am, you're gonna be begging for me back.

If you're reading this then I'm screwed.