296Fifteen: Backne
Authors Note: Okay, I totally didn't plan on making this a series, but the more I thought of poor frustrated Phineas, the more I loved the idea. I really enjoy writing this side of Phineas. I love getting to explore things that irritate him, and insecurities that puberty causes him. This is just gonna be a series of one-shots about Phineas's struggles at age 15. There won't be any scheduled updating for the pure sake that I couldn't justify starting this if I was promising that. So just keep your eyes open. Also, as of now I have a couple of ideas for future chapters, but feel free to send in any ideas you'd like to see. Once I run out of ideas I will likely write a final chapter that ends the series, but until then the story will always be marked as complete because all of these could technecely stand on their own. As always, let me know what you guys think!
"Aahhh!" I huff as I try to make my arm bend lower onto my back.
At the moment I am having another problem with puberty.
You know how some people get acne on their face? Well, I have it on my back, like, everywhere. I'm talking everywhere from my shoulders to my mid-back is covered with huge red pimples. It's kinda gross.
At the moment I'm standing in front of the mirror in my room with one of Candace's acne cleaning pads in my hand, and I am trying to cover my back in the stuff, but there's a spot that I can't quite reach. It's driving me crazy!
You see, I get why people hate getting acne on their faces, I really do. I mean it has to suck. You know, everyone can see it, it's hard not to pop them when they stare you down in the mirror, yadda, yadda, yadda.
But I would argue that having it on your back is worse. First off, there's the pressure that is placed on you because people can't see it. It's like I have to make sure the collar on my shirt covers my acne, because it has to stay a secret. At least when people have it on their faces there's no pressure to hide it. I mean what's a guy gonna do, wear a ski mask?
Steal his mom's makeup and then try to figure out how to use it correctly? Note to all guys: It can't be done; I don't know how girls use makeup to cover anything. Seriously it just makes a giant pink-brown blob on your skin! How is that any less noticeable? How do you make that stuff work? Is there a magic word that only girls are allowed to know?
Ahem… Not that I've ever stolen or used my mom's makeup.
Anyway…
Reason number two that back acne is worse, it's not upfront. Like I said before, when you have acne on your face, everyone knows. But when you have back acne people don't know. Now imagine going to a pool party. Seriously, I know that when I take my shirt off and reveal all of this acne people are going to stare out of pure shock.
Like, 'oh Phineas has acne? Eww, I didn't know that. He's way less attractive now' and so on. All because no one knew.
You see people get used to seeing face acne, so in time people are just so used to it that it's like they don't even notice anymore.
With acne on your back it's like a shock every time for the pure sake that people don't see it every day and get used to it. I mean, I can't exactly go to school with my shirt off. Not that I would, because you know, I have acne.
And finally reason number three, I can't reach all of my back. I bet no one else can either. So instead of using acne wash to clear up my skin, I'm stuck hunched over like an idiot, trying to reach all of my back. People with acne on their faces do not have this problem!
"Ugg! Why can't I reach?" I scream again as I try to bend in a way that will allow me to reach the one dry spot on my back.
As if on cue I hear a voice coming from the door.
"Am I interrupting something?" Ferb asks in a confused, yet slightly amused voice.
"Ahh!" I scream before falling on the floor in surprise.
"You alright?" Ferb asks walking over to me.
I quickly stand up before he reaches me.
"When did you get in here? Seriously, I didn't even hear the door open! What are you, a ninja or something?" I spout out embarrassed. I can't believe I fell. I think being fifteen also makes me less coordinated.
"What are you doing?" He asks with a raised brow.
It is then that I take a moment to calm myself and think about what he saw when he walked into the room. Me, bent over with my arm stretched across my back. Totally normal.
I hope my butt looked good.
"I'm, uh, trying to put this acne stuff on my back, but I can't reach," I say embarrassed, while I rub my left hand on the backmy neck. "I have pimples on my back." I add on the end, before realizing just how stupid I sound.
He snorts before giving me a look that says 'That would explain the need to put 'acne stuff' on your back.'
I smile embarrassedly, but he spares me by not actually saying his thought out loud.
He walks over and grabs the container of acne pads on my dresser and takes one before walking behind me and starting to wipe it over my back.
"There are worse things than having backne," he says as though he can feel my insecurities. Backne is a really good name for back pimples on the other hand.
"Psh- As if you know anything about acne." I throw over my shoulder.
"I had a bit on my face," he argues as he wipes a second time over my 'backne' as I will now be calling it.
"If by a bit you mean two pimples on your face when you were thirteen, then I agree." I think Ferb managed to avoid every bad aspect of puberty. Maybe that's why I'm getting all of the bad stuff, you know, to balance out the amount of suffering in the house.
"It was still on my face," he says, his breath tickling my left ear.
"It's better to have it on your face. At least then people don't start staring at you when you take your shirt off." I say trying to keep the insecurity out of my voice and failing.
Ferb finishes wiping and then leans a little closer to me, placing his lips mere centimeters from my ear. "Believe me Phin, that's not what people will be staring at when you take your shirt off," he says as he runs his hand over my chest from behind, and I swear to God I have to hold back a moan.
I want to lean into his touch, but just as soon as he's touching me, he's gone, walking away to throw away his used acne pad and the one I had dropped on the floor earlier.
I sigh, now completely frustrated, half naked, and just a tiny shred of dignity away from jumping Ferb where he stands.
Ferb walks behind me and grabs both the container of pads and the lid before he screws the top back on.
"By the way, Candace called mum yesterday wondering where these disappeared to," Ferb says, completely unfazed by the look of wanting on my face. "You should probably give these back and let mum know you 'have pimples on your back'." Ferb says grinning and adding finger quotes.
"Shut-up." I say with my face flushed.
"Dinner's in ten," he says before handing me the container and walking out of the room.
I walk over to my bed and grab my discarded shirt, and start pulling it over my head before I mumble angrily to myself. "I hate being fifteen."