6Chapter three – Primus Lune
Remus Lupin had never considered himself worthy of being a Marauder. Even now, years after his friendships with James, Sirius and Peter were sealed in a hushed deal never to spread his secret, he somehow never felt quite good enough. He knew he wasn't particularly handsome, or funny or naturally talented. The one thing that stood out about Remus Lupin was his ability to work his very hardest at everything. Classes; friends, the... problem. He read so many books his side of the dormitory was practically a library. He wanted to be involved in pranks but he didn't want to hurt people – so, being a good friend, he kept his friends in check. It didn't always work, but some of the ideas Sirius came up with simply had to be ground to a halt before he got too enthusiastic about them.
Then there was his problem. By nature, Remus was a gentle person. He wasn't cruel, he didn't hex unnecessarily and he was always the mediator in arguments between his more vocal friends. But this kind side to him felt like a front sometimes, especially around the time of the Full Moon. He could feel anger seeping through his thoughts, as weariness of an impending fate and the knowledge that no matter how hard he willed he wouldn't be able to stop it brought his good side to a halt. To put it quite simply, being around Remus Lupin during his 'time of the month' was an absolute nightmare.
Lily had noticed that Remus was not quite himself. His usually cheerful demeanour in Potions meant that, seeing as they were partners, she enjoyed chatting with him. Today, however, was hell.
"Remus, pass me the ginger roots please?" Remus practically threw them across the table. Lily sighed. It was going to be a long lesson. She herself wasn't feeling over the moon as just this morning she had been hassled by the obvious group of Slytherins who had been getting a little too pushy for her comfort. Hell, just being near them made her feel uncomfortable. Remembering Sirius' words from last week after the last incident, she reminded herself that she was a strong witch with more than enough talent to take them out. She would let them get away with it until it became something worth worrying over.
Remus glared at the potion. Focus, you idiot. She's already suspicious that you're so grumpy and she's too smart to keep thinking you just have mood swings. Calm down. Breathe. Breathe. Sucking in more air than necessary, Remus attempted a civil conversation as his inner demons fought.
"So, Lily, how are you? Everything all okay?" Lily narrowed her eyes suspiciously.
"I'm just peachy, actually. What have you heard?" Her eyes focused on an innocent looking Sirius at the table next to them.
Remus instantly regretted broaching her wellbeing as the topic of conversation. If there was one girl who could glare into submission, it was Lily Evans.
"Absolutely nothing at all, of course." He replied as breezily as he could attempt under her gaze. Cottoning onto Sirius' gestures when he lost her focus, he attempted to salvage the situation.
"As much as you are wonderful at protecting your friends, Remus, you are absolutely dreadful at lying. Which is why your friends do it for you, I assume?" Her gaze was bordering on frightening now.
"Wha...what do you mean? I'm not lying! They don't lie! We haven't lied!" Remus was trying to look at anything but her.
Sirius was rolling his eyes behind Lily's back, shrugging his arms as if to say, 'well, you've done it now. Good luck mate.' James was frowning at their interaction, knowing that Moony needed a way out of talking right now.
"Hey Evans! Go out with me?" Lily didn't blink.
"I promise to not make fun of you about the time you sleep walked to the common room and pronounced to a very frightened bunch of second years to remain abstinent and that all boys are pricks?"
That seemed to do it. With a sigh of relief, Remus resumed his care of the potion as if his life depended on it, and Lily snapped her glare towards James.
"That was ages ago and you know it! I was stressed and it doesn't matter why it happened, just leave it!" She hissed.
His smirk grew wider.
"Of course love, whatever you say. It wouldn't be that I saw you staring at me swimming in the lake and called you out on it that very day?"
Lily's face was now very close to matching her hair.
"No it most certainly wasn't! And I was only watching to...to make sure that you didn't drown Remus over here!"
Remus looked up as his name entered the heated exchange. He sighed internally, knowing there would be no stopping the bad mood spreading, it was almost contagious. He was weary, hungry and downright miserable. He needed to get tonight over with, release the animal he could feel awakening inside of him and become his normal self once more.
Lily had finished her bickering with James with a flourish; he was now sporting a rather large amount of armadillo bile in his hair. With a shrug, he went back to the now melting cauldron that Sirius hadn't been attending to in his absence – apparently, reading Quidditch through the Ages was preferable to passing Potions. James wasn't particularly bothered though, the bile was useful as a distraction as Lily had calmed down and had turned back to her potion. Then, the sniggering from the corner of the dungeon got louder.
"It seems like you're no match for a girl, ay Potter? At least your hair now matches your personality...disgusting and vomit-inducing in every way.
James whipped his head around so quickly he almost strained it.
"That's really the best you can do, Snivellus? Your personality matches your wit – boring, leachy and prejudiced in every way. Evans is more than a match for me; in fact I wouldn't be surprised if she took me down in a duel the same as everyone in this room. So don't talk down to her or me."
Lily was blushing. Since when was Potter nice about her? She knew she worked hard, but she didn't think he paid that much attention to what she was actually like. Snapping out of her thoughts, she turned her infamous death stare on the two boys.
"I don't need you to act in my honour, Potter! And really Snape, if the best you can do is insult based on looks, I don't think you should be one to be commenting. At least find something you don't like that isn't hypocritical?"
Snape flushed the darkest red the class had ever seen on his sallow skin. He looked at Lily almost regretfully for about two seconds, and then a sneer rippled on his face.
"Don't address me Mudblood, you're not even worthy of the wand in your hand let alone to talk to someone of better birth. Get your head out of your arse and bother someone who cares." The class sucked an intake of breath in all at once; they hadn't expected a brawl so publicly. Everyone knew that Severus Snape and Lily Evans were no longer on amicable terms, but not many had realised just how brutal things actually were.
Sirius restrained James who was making a lunge for Snape.
"Don't do it mate, he's not worth it. Get him another time when Sluggy isn't in the room," nodding his head at the Potions Master who was searching his cupboard for the last box of crystallised pineapple and hadn't noticed a disturbance, such was his distress at not finding it. James slowly nodded, and narrowed his eyes.
"She's the brightest witch you'll ever meet, her blood means nothing and you should feel ashamed that you judge people based on how they were born rather than who they are. Lily Evans is worth a million of you, so don't for one second believe that you are superior in any way."
The class ended in a scramble, as most people were watching the interaction with more interest than their potion, and Slughorn had told the class in a surprised tone that a new brew should be conducted. Somehow, however, Remus and Lily's potion was perfect. Remus smiled to himself. Even when she was in a public brawl Lily's work was flawless. He was glad that James had defended her; it would have made it much worse if he had. Snape suspected who he was, he knew. He'd probably tell the whole school the first instant he got proof. However, a public confrontation was never a good idea even without evidence. Hints can lead to curious people, and curious people can lead to delving into why exactly he was absent from school for a couple of days around the full moon. No, Remus Lupin was no coward, but he certainly wanted to keep that secret in the dark from the general population of Hogwarts.
NYL
Lying on his extremely comfortable ruby red bed some hours later after witnessing Lily bawling out James in the corridor for ironically causing a scene in Potions, Remus contemplated a certain bet that he had rashly made. James was nowhere near getting Lily to demonstrate publicly a sign that she held some form of romantic affection towards him and he couldn't help but wonder whether he was happy about that or not. Of course, keeping clear of dating was ideal. However, it would certainly be worth it if Lily finally got through whatever issues girls seemed to have with liking a boy and being reasonable about it (he didn't pretend to understand and he was certain he never would) and James would stop being a prick and pull his socks up (both metaphorically and literally).
The dorm room opened and a mountain of snacks preceded a red faced Peter, no doubt from the efforts of carrying the large amount of food and drink all the way up from the kitchens by himself.
"Alright Pete? Need a hand?" Remus smiled at his short friend, who looked like he had no idea now he was stopping as to how to put everything down without destroying something.
Peter smiled in agreement. "Cheers Remus, I'd forgotten that we were planning our next moonlight expedition this evening, and I figured we'd be hungry halfway through. Mum always reckons that they don't feed us enough here no matter how many letters Dumbledore sends in reply reassuring her that we're perfectly well fed. She says 'we're growing boys that need constant nourishment otherwise we might have health problems'."
Remus laughed and took the big bag of Mini Cheddars and the block of Fruit and Nut Dairy Milk out of his hands.
"Your mum knows best, of course! Her roast potatoes are legendary. If she feels like sending another care package, I'm sure they'd be well appreciated." Peter grinned and nodded. "I'll pass that on!"
James and Sirius waltzed into the dorm.
"Good thinking Wormy! I like your style. We can never have too much food, in my good opinion." Peter flushed at the praise. James began wolfing down Hula Hoops by the handful and the meeting began.
"By the way, my fellow Marauders ... I may have come up with a plan as to how to win over Miss Evans. Anyone want to hear?"
A/N Hello there to new readers and anyone who is still with me! This is my first proper fanfic, so I hope you're enjoying it so far. If you could review (please be gentle haha) and let me know what you think, that would be lovely. I should probably do a disclaimer – I of course own absolutely nothing in the Harry Potter world, however much I'd like to. Also, a Happy Birthday to Tom Felton for yesterday (forever fangirling), and a big thank you to Natatat10 for being so nice in her comments. Apologies for the really long delay in update, I've had my first week at university and mayhem in between. Thanks for reading!