Just a random little thing that floated into my head, funnily enough in slightly drunken haze. I'll be doing just three of these (they aren't related to each other though possible set in the same world?): no strings attached kind of writing. Undeep, unmeaningful and completely pointless. In this one, I warn you, there's a very morally questionable plot, underage drinking and a very stupid Hitomi. Read at your own peril.

Let me know if I should bother with the other two.



Disclaimer: I don't own Escaflowne.

Warning:Do not attempt this at home... or in a bar... or anywhere alright! All men are dangerous! *wild look* Trust no one!


Hitomi looked around the bar, befuddled, but still with discomfort.

She suppressed a drunken snort. Only she would worry even when partially sloshed.

'Reduces self-awareness my ass!' She thought rudely as she tried to remember which her right foot was. That was the one that went first wasn't it? According to that fabulous song anyway...

She was still humming that fabulous songhalf an hour later when the door, strategically placed right opposite her by some higher power- God, karma... an author perchance? Who knew?- opened and the coldest draught that had ever 'draughted' hit her.

She shivered.

It was a sign. Well the sixth sign really. She should not have come tonight.

When the taxi broken down ten blocks from her destination, she sighed but didn't give it another thought.

When it began snowing as she walked to her destination, she cursed mildly.

When random, creepy men hit on her as she walked to her destination because she'd decided to slut it up –fishnet stalking! Why?- she glared belligerently.

When, on reaching the destination she realized that her date was yet to arrive and thus she knew no one there she chose to settle down with a very, very strong drink.

When, an hour later she realized that she had been stood up and was drunk enough to be babbling mindlessly- in case there is another way to babble- she decided that introspection was required.

But, that draught settled it. Slow she might but, but thick? Not she! Ominous winds deserve ones' undivided attention. And really she had to get out of here, before someone else 'bought her a drink' or worse she opened her big fat drunken mouth and spewed out dangerous details. For example: she was only seventeen, she didn't have a ride home and so on.

She stood up, and marvelled at how steady she was.

Then she attempted to move.

Understandably it wasn't very... coordinated.

She stumbled through the room and managed to make it to the door only bumping three or four people, spilling one drink and muttering, 'Merci' to the French man she was supposed to be apologizing to.

A success really.

However, even she had to admit that barrelling into a man who was courteously holding the door open for you was a sign of one needing to sober up.

"I'm so sorry." She apologized taking a step away from him and wondering if it would be rude to just leave.

His first reaction was a glare she noticed, but as he gauged her, his face relaxed and he said politely, but she felt with some sarcasm, "Not at all. I was unquestionably in the way."

She looked sheepish and muttered another apology. Now she could leave surely? He'd gotten that little dig in, she was repentant.

"Not so drunk that you can't feel repentant but drunk enough to think out aloud? What put you in this unquestionably uncomfortable state? Should I be wary of the whisky?"

She bit her lip, flushed and then answered in a small voice "And the gin."

Her victim chuckled and said, "Duly noted. And for this useful warning, shall I hail you a cab?"

She shook her head slightly vouching that her friend was just a block away.

She didn't add that a block away he should stay seeing as there was little chance, even in hell, that he'd pick her up outside a bar at two in the morning...

...Or so she thought.

He was looking at her thoughtfully, "Let me guess, underage?"

She felt panic stir in her and turned to flee but discovered that being drunk often inhibits ones abilities to 'run like the wind'

Damn alcohol.

His hand was clamped firmly on her shoulder and he said, "I don't think so. You'll probably run into a tree and that's the last thing I need." She heard him mutter after this, though undoubtedly she wasn't supposed to, "And I'm not even on duty."

"Cop?" She squealed, deciding that her current situation had left her with such little dignity that squeaking could hardly allow her to lose more.

Another laugh, "You really have to stop thinking out aloud. And no, I'm not a cop, though I will be in one year and six months. As you can imagine, I'm not looking forward to dragging you down to the station."

Her eyes widened perceptibly and he noted with satisfaction that she struggled a bit more. Maybe a little fear would do her some good.

She said however with frightening lucidity for someone in her inebriate state, "As a cadet you have no right to arrest me or to report me for any crime you think I may have committed." She paused, "Also I turn eighteen in three days."

He looked impressed but said with amusement, "As a legal citizen two years your senior however I have a responsibility to."

She felt she was getting more sober by the minute, "I could scream rape." She answered.

"My friend owns the bar." He countered, grin widening.

She wondered whether she should just kick him in the shins and make a mad dash for it seeing as she was now decidedly sober.

"Since you're still talking aloud- in third person mind you- I wouldn't recommend trying it. There's still fear of that tree. And you ramming into it."

She watched him with growing dislike, "Do you usually make fun of people you're threatening to throw in jail for a misdemeanour?"

His smile turned unholy as she said this and he replied, "Only when they're pretty seventeen year olds."


"Are you HITTING on me?" She sounded outraged.

"A little." He admitted, not sounding the least bit ashamed.

"That's illegal!" She exclaimed.

He raised an eye brow, "To hit on a minor?"

"You're a cop." She protested.

"A cadet." He corrected with a grin.

"I now demand proof." She... demanded.

He pulled out his wallet and flipped it open.

"Been practising that move haven't you?" She asked conversationally as she peered at his identity card.

"As often as I can." He said solemnly.

"Well good. Nothing is quite as impressive as a cop with a good wallet-flip. So cadet Fanel, why are you hitting on a poor seventeen year old girl? Two years younger than you I might add."

"You turn eighteen in three days." He replied cheekily.

She huffed, "Look, not interested. And my ride will start to wonder where I've gone. We can't have that can we?"

"Why were you even in this wretched place?" he asked with a frown.

She frowned also, but asked lightly, despite knowing the truth "Is that the way you talk about your friend's fine establishment?"

He didn't smile, "I was lying and you know it. Don't change the subject. You aren't in some sort of trouble are you?"

She straightened and said haughtily "Even if I was, it's none of your business. You don't even know my name."

"Well?" He asked, once again slightly amused.

She sniffed, "I've no plans on telling you."

He finally let go of her arm and held out a hand, "Van Fanel, nice to meet you."

She sniffed again, but responded, "Hitomi Kanzakhi. Charmed I'm sure."

"Do you go to college round here Hitomi Kanzakhi?"

"I will in a little while." She replied evasively.

"Suspicious soul, aren't you?" He asked with what she felt was a look approval.

She nodded and said, "This really has been lovely," She smiled to show that she was sincere, "But my ride really is waiting. So I'll have to go."

Van nodded thoughtfully and said, "Do you want an escort?"

She shook her head.

Van smiled brilliantly, "But that gives me no opportunity whatsoever to kiss you."

Hitomi stared. "Excuse me?"

"The walk there would have enabled me to flirt outrageously, ask you out and kiss you. I can hardly do that all in the one minute it'll take you to shake my hand and leave."

She primed her mouth, mostly because she knew she not ought to encourage this possibly insane man. "And what makes you think I would have let you kiss me?"

"It would have been a chaste peck." He assured.

She rolled her eyes and said, "You would have been given no encouragement, denied and slapped soundly across the face."

His eyes danced, "No? Really?"

"Most definitely." She assured. "And you should know better than to hit on unsuspecting girls. Now good bye Van Fanel." She shook his hand and walked to the driveway before he could respond.

He watched her walk away with a faint smile.

She paused, but didn't turn around as she said clearly, "There's an old library on Palais road. Three days time. At four thirty. Creepy policemen are not welcome, but rather cute boys are." She walked on.

He grinned like a moron.

Le Fin.