A/N: This was originally chapter nine, but it's done before chapter eight, so I'm changing them! I've been on vacation and doing summer work for the past couple weeks, but now I'm updating again! At least fake cheer! I have to do this…I am so sorry. Oh well, you guys did say you liked crackfics, I hope you like this one too!

Disclaimer: Why must I constantly be reminded of the fact that I am not, nor ever will be, Scott Westerfeld…no matter how awesome that would be and how impossible that is. I highly doubt Scott Westerfeld is a fifteen year old girl writing fanfics about his own book series. Oh well, This site demands the disclaimer!


Dylan's POV

I walked up to meet my new captain. I had been admitted into the British Air Service and would be serving aboard the Leviathan. When I walked to the docking site, I saw a man with a moustache standing below the airship.

"Er…Captain Hobbes…?"

"Yes, that's me. Are you my new middy?"

"Oh, er, yes, sir!"

"Good, good. What's your name, son?"


"Well? Spit it out, boy!"

"Dylan Sharp, sir." The captain choked in shock. Dylan smacked a hand to his forehead and heard laughter coming from behind him. Both the captain and Dylan turned around to see Jaspert, Deryn, and Alek laughing at the captain's expression. Jaspert called out.

"Don't worry, captain! He's not hers, he's mine!" Captain Hobbes looked down at the blushing boy.

"You're sixteen? And definitely a boy?"

"Yes and yes, sir."

"Then I'm sure we'll have no problems." Said the captain with a wink.

Regular POV

The captain walked up to the threesome and shook hands with Alek and Jaspert ("His mother decided she would spare you her laughter when you met him. Deryn wouldn't miss it, though!") before turning to Deryn, who hugged him and said,

"Shocked? Jaspert thought it would be dead funny, though it was even better when Dylan decided he wanted to join the Air Service."

"Ah, Deryn! If he's anything like his aunt, this will certainly be interesting." Deryn beamed as they heard a voice call out.

"Dyl-Deryn? Alek?" The two turned around and saw Newkirk running towards them. "Hey! I thought it was you two! I-" Newkirk stopped short and started grinning like an idiot when he looked down to Alek's hand around Deryn's waist. "You two! I knew it! I knew it! Let it be known, on record, that I, Blank Newkirk, knew that you two would end up together! Though I must admit, when I first realized Alek liked Deryn, I thought he was homosexual…but enough about that! Heh heh." Alek stared at Newkirk with a strange expression plastered on his face. "What's wrong, Alek?"

"Well, the truth is that I thought so too…" The group went silent until Jaspert broke the tension with a booming laugh.

"Well, my baby sister, you certainly played your part well. The dashing young airman, though maybe you threw in a little too much swagger. You always did learn fast!" Alek blushed and Deryn slapped Jaspert's back. Dylan walked up to join in on the group. His father, the captain, and the other man were certainly enjoying the conversation. He was vaguely aware of a boy about his age walk past him to stand shyly in front of the captain.

"Erm…sir. I was directed here. Are you Captain Hobbes?"

"Yes, you must be my other new middy!"

"Yes, sir."

"Well, out with it!"


"Your name, boy. I need to know your name!" The boy flushed terribly.

"Oh right! S-sorry, sir! Midshipman Alex Faren, sir!" Everyone went silent; even Jaspert ceased his laughter. It was Newkirk who broke the tension this time.

"This is so weird! I wish this boy were Austrian! You are a boy, right? Oi! Ease up! I was only joking!" Deryn and Alek just looked at each other before joining Newkirk, Jaspert, and the captain in laughter. After all, it was a strange coincidence.


A/N: So…how 'bout them apples? Heh heh. Don't you just love Newkirk? So…what do you think? My first update in a while, review please! I love to hear what you think! Thank you to everyone who reads this! I'm so happy you read all of the chapters! (Unless you just skipped to a chapter that you felt like reading because you didn't want to actually read them all. If that's the case, you get a frowny face sticker on your life. Sorry…it's an expression me and my friends use. You should use it too…it's really fun to say! You just tried it…didn't you?)