17Disclaimer - I do not, and most probally never will, own the Harry Potter universe and all of J.K Rowlings lovely characters. But a girl can dream, right?
This is a one shot involving Gred and Forge Weasley educating Hogwarts and all fanfiction writers out there about an extremely serious issue. Yes, you read right, Gred and Forge being serious. I know this makes you want to read :)
It was currently dinner time at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. The ceiling, which is magically enchanted to show the sky and its current weather conditions, was slowly darkening from blue to purple, indicating that evening was closing in. All five tables (including the teachers) were abuzz with lively chatter. However, on one table the talking was focused on one specific point. The topic of conversation could be considered unusual but noone was overly concerned. Gryffindor table was exchanging random and interesting theories about why two people were not present.
You may be wondering why this could be acknowledged as strange. The thing is that the two specific people missing were non other than the Weasley twins. Fred and George ... or was it George and Fred? ... Weasley never missed dinner; come to think of it, they never missed breakfast or lunch either. So it was indeed a strange occurence when the infamous pranksters skipped a meal. Quite a lot of the table were wondering if they were ill. Some others were convinced they were in the midst of creating an amazing prank. Unfortunately, no one knew the precise reason.
"I bet they're running amuck and causing chaos whilst everyone is preoccupied." Hermione said, crossing her arms in a way which channeled Mrs Weasley. "It's a wonder they're even passing their classes." She sniffed in a way which clearly signified she was very displeased with their behaviour.
"Don't be such a spoil sport 'Mione. For all you know they could be studying." Ron responded, trying to hide his smile by burying more food into his mouth. Everyone who heard the comment snorted. The Weasley twins study? Your more likely to see a troll dance ballet.
"You shouldn't be so hard on them Herms ..."
"DON'T CALL ME HERMS!"
"They're probally practising a new charm or something. I mean, they are missing dinner. They'd only do that if its something serious. When have you known Ron to ever skip a chance to consume food?" Harry asked, his eyebrow raised questioning. Hermione just sulked and poked her steak with her fork, quite violently too. The talk soon drifted away from the absence of the Wealsey twins and soon came onto the subject of Quidditch. But before Harry could argue that Puddlemore United were better than The Cannons, a loud bang could be heard from the front of the hall. Above the teachers table was a large banner. It was purple and orange, a very bright purple and orange, and had big bold letters printed across the material .
"SAY NO TO TWINCEST!"
Hermione sighed and looked at Harry and Ron. Silently, she conveyed the message of 'I told you so.' Suddenly, the doors to the Great Hall opened and in walked the Weasley twins. But something was wrong, very wrong. Instead of their usual mischevious smirk, they looked solemn and serious. In the middle of the hall a platform was made and soon the twins jumped onto it. After a quick sonorous charm they were ready to speak. (AN: George will be in italics and Fred will be bold.)
" Ladies and Gentleman ..."
"... Ghosts and Ghouls ..."
" ... Professors and Snape ..."
"... ,we are interupting your dinner for a very ..."
" ... extremlely ..."
"... important matter."
"Dear audience ... "
" ... we are concerned ..."
" ... incredibly so ..."
"... by the amount of fanfictions which include us ..."
" .. The Great Forge and Gred ... "
" ... Gred and Forge ... together!... "
" We do love stories about us ..."
"... it is very flattering .."
"However, we hate ..."
" ... depsise ..."
" ... loathe ... "
"TWINCEST!"
"Twincest is vile. It needs to be stopped ..."
" ... but to stop it, my lovely audience .."
"We need your help."
"We need to unite ..."
"To stand against this ... immoral ..."
"... inhuman ... "
" ... absolutely disgusting ... Thing! "
"Show your support ... "
"... and buy your very own ..."
"Anti-Twincest Badge!"
"They come in house colours!"
"Thank you for listening!"
Fred and George took of the charm and swept into a flourishing bow. Applause swept across the hall. When they left the hall, a puff of smoke covered the students. When it dissapeared, everyone's ears were replaced by animal counterparts. Harry, with his cat ears twitching, looked at Hermione.
"You could of done something like that for SPEW."
"It's S.P.E.W!" Hermione shrieked, her bunny ears standing on end. She threw her fork at Harry and thanks to Harry's seeker reflexes he managed to avoid getting injured. Soon after the speech, Dumbledoor sent everyone to bed.
The next day everyone could be seen wearing badges, even the Professors. The Patil's were handing out leaflets to raise awarness. Lucy and Liam Moon were telling horror stories to the first years about Twincest. What surprised everyone though was Hermione's badge. After a bit of extra spell work, her badge changed from gold to red. The slogan changed with each flash. "Say no to Twincest." "Twincest is wrong!" and Harry's personal favourite "Twincest is for Snakes. 20 points from Slytherin!"
This fic has a very serious moral. Twincest is wrong. Just like Fred and George said, we need to unite. Review and show the world that twincest is wrong!
Thank you for reading,
Tattie Byes :)