Dear Diary,

I'm scared. I'm scared of going out into a world that has so much evil, so many bad people. I'm afraid of leaving the rose-tinted bubble of Hogwarts; I've been so happy here, more than I ever thought I could, will things ever be the same? Will I ever fit into a place as well as I do here?

I'm scared of losing my friends, not only metaphorically. I don't know who I would be without them, they define who I am and what I stand for. They have been there through so much. I will miss the little moments, the smiles, the laughter, the familiarity with each other. My greatest fear is that we will lose that, that we'll drift apart, find new friends and change, become unrecognizable to each other. I miss them already: Alice, Marlene, the Marauders. James.

Oh God James. I can't lose him, I just can't. He feels like the missing part of me, I just couldn't live without him. I prided myself on being independent, on not needing to lean on anyone but then he came along...he changed everything. I did not know how much better it felt to let someone in for a change, to not only dependent on myself. But now I've left myself vulnerable, what will I do if he leaves? How will I ever be able to manage again? I'm worried, more than you can know, what happens when he leaves these enchanted walls and has every girl he comes across throwing themselves at his feet. Prettier, smarter, more charmer, less argumentative girls. Then why would he still want me? How could he still want me?

I ache when I think of all the summer days with James-the best of my life. Sneaking off to go kiss in a broom-cupboard, laying next to him stargazing, snuggling beside the fire and just talking. I do not know what I did to deserve someone as breath-taking as James, there are no words to describe how amazing he is. He is fiercely loyal, selflessly brave, generously caring and everything that is good in this world. I pray to God everyday that we will stay the same, that fate will never snatch him away from me, like it did Sev.

Please, just don't take away James.

Lily