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Hermione Undaunted

Chapter 5

Hermione lay in bed for long hours thinking over her third and final detention with Professor Snape. He had told her a lot of things he probably should not have during the first one and then said almost nothing over the course of the next two. She reciprocated in kind and set to pickling rat spleens extracting flobberworm mucus with the same kind of aplomb she usually approached all her work. Even if she was not going to be using the flobberworm mucus herself, there was no reason she could not extract high quality product for the next person. In so doing she helped assuage some of her own guilt of knowingly, and with very little conscience, cheating. Out of all the things Professor Snape had to say to her, that weighed on her the heaviest. Was there a justification for cheating? She was never one to really see things in pure black and white, but perhaps the shades of grey were more numerous than she originally imagined. Snape's admission that Voldemort was aware of her, and that strange detention where he had uncomfortably given her Umbridge's quill did not even weigh as heavily on her mind as his accusations against her character. That, and the way he smelled. That would not really leave her mind either. She was so absorbed in her thoughts that she never even thought to question why she was doing typical potions detention when he now taught DADA.

Nevertheless, the silence between them reigned supreme for hours and hours. What he did do was every so often was look at her and attempt to invade her mind while she worked. His Legilimency was mild and never penetrated deeper than the task she was currently working on, but by the third detention she was able to feel when he was trying to make eye contact and she stopped looking up at him. He seemed satisfied that this was a development and started trying to penetrate her mind without catching her eye. She missed his first few intrusions and he caught he thinking about Amortentia while she was pickling the last of the rat spleens, but she managed to Occlude him quickly at least if not a little sloppily. He still never spoke and she could not even work up the courage to ask him about the potions book. She did not really need confirmation anymore that he was indeed the Half-Blood Prince, but she did want to know why their text was so inept that a mere teenager could run roughshod over it and only do improvement. How was she supposed to learn anything at all? Maybe she would not have to ask. She could simply bring the information to the front of her mind and let him see it for himself.

Hermione was putting a stopper in the last vial of flobberworm mucus with one hand and vanishing her mess with the other when she heard Snape's chair scrape back from his desk audibly. The way he clenched his left fist made it painfully clear he had been summoned and his warnings from a few days previously finally settled inside her. His is a name, you above all people, should learn how to fear, he had said. Was she really that important to Voldemort? Sure she was Harry Potter's best friend and was preparing to make the war go as smoothly as possible for her and her friends, but what chance did she really have against him? She wasn't the only Muggle born out there that he could possibly have a problem with.

"That will be all, Miss Granger."

Hermione glanced at his arm quickly and she knew that he recognized her understanding of why she was being so abruptly dismissed. Her insides still turned a little cold as he directed his angry and stony glare at her. She nodded quickly and stepped through the doorway as he held the door open for her and disappeared out of the dungeons without even looking back.

It had gotten very late and she hoped that Professor Snape was back and unharmed. If only there was something she could do.

..

..

Severus Snape sat back in his chair and silently reveled in the singular joy of watching Albus Dumbledore purple faced with rage and frustration. Severus took great pleasure in making people angry even at the risk of biting the hands that feed him. It was careless and very un-Slytherin like, but then Dumbledore always did say that Severus should have been a Gryffindor.

"You are a spy, Severus," Dumbledore hissed through clenched teeth. "Your duty is to pass information along, not withhold it."

"Not until you explain your little escapades," Severus said calmly picking an imaginary piece of dirt from underneath his fingernail.

Dumbledore pushed his glasses further up on his nose and glared at Severus. "I will dispense information to you as necessary."

"As will I," Snape replied unconcerned. The information he had was not exactly worth the drama, Snape just wanted to make Dumbledore's blood boil. The old man had already asked him for far more than he ever imagined he would have to give and the stress was taking its toll on both of them. "What is it about Potter that makes him so damned important?"

"The prophecy, Severus, the prophecy," Dumbledore said with a longsuffering sigh.

It was Severus's turn to lose his patience. "Forget the sodding prophecy. You and I both know they are self-fulfilling and that I could walk up to the Dark Lord and use the Killing Curse on him myself, and he would still be dead. What have you been doing, and why is it so damned important that Potter's left alive to end this? What have you been teaching him? What do you know?"

"I will dispense that information when the time is appropriate," Dumbledore repeated. "You need to protect Potter and his friends. He will need them and will not be able to complete his mission without them. You will need to trust me."

"Unrequited trust," Severus mused. "It doesn't have the same melancholic notes that unrequited love has does it? Yet it is still romantic, pathetic, and incredibly like you."

Albus, fully recovered from his previous fury ignored the comment. "You must also convince Draco to go into hiding with Order as soon as feasibly possible. After my death they can protect him and his mother."

Severus rolled his eyes. "Draco is a Death Eater now, Albus. There is only way out of that particular club."

"Nevertheless, you must try," Dumbledore insisted.

"Do you remember my friend, Regulus Black?" Severus asked but didn't wait for an answer. "He knew something about the Dark Lord as well. I wonder if your little escapades are similar to his. Of course, he ended up dead as far as we know since his body was never recovered, killed by the Dark Lord himself most likely. Maybe you will kill yourself on one of these trips and solve Draco's problem for him. Perhaps you should share what you are doing with someone besides Potter so that if you do, let's just say, slip and fall; your mission will still be complete."

"When I confirm my suspicions you and Potter both will know what you need to know to complete my mission," Dumbledore replied his temper beginning to flare again.

Severus threw back and laughed. "Ah, so you admit it is your mission and Potter doesn't even know what you are scheming, yet you have convinced him to blindly follow you into the dark as well as me?"

"What's the matter, Severus? Disappointed to learn that you have more in common with the boy than you thought?" Dumbledore asked drily.

Severus made a sound somewhere deep in his throat. He had plenty in common with Potter and he refused to admit to a single bit of it.

"Tut-tut, Severus," Dumbledore chastised. "Take care of your students. That is an order."

"They are your students as well," Severus reminded him.

Dumbledore placed his palms flat on his desk and leant forward towards Severus. "Do not think I have forgotten that."

Severus made no reply. As far as he was concerned the meeting was over.

"Your information, Severus. What did you learn from your last meeting with the Dark Lord?" Dumbledore persisted, the twinkle in his eye dulling to an icy blue.

"Funny how the tables can be turned, isn't it?" Severus asked snidely just to anger the old man even more.

"Remember your oaths, Severus. Do not forget who it was that kept you alive."

"Well, we all make mistakes, don't we?" Severus stood up knowing full well that was going to give Dumbledore the information he wanted and not liking himself for it one bit. "The Dark Lord has narrowed down his candidates for whom he would like to raise to the seat of Minister for Magic when Scrimgeour is assassinated. It might also behoove the Order to appoint a secretary to the Muggle Prime Minister for protection and damage control. It could be months before the Dark Lord has Ministry control, but it shouldn't be too long before the Death Eaters make the magical world undeniably known to the Muggles."

Dumbledore relaxed back in his chair. The satisfied expression he had on his face was enough to make Severus loathe him for the moment.

"Who is on the top of the list for Minister?" Dumbledore asked visibly mulling the news over.

Severus stood up to leave. "Pius Thicknesse."

Severus was all the way to the door before Dumbledore chuckled behind him. "You have to stop avoiding me, Severus. You cannot do this by yourself."

"That's rather hypocritical coming from you, don't you think?" Severus asked. "Perhaps I am simply preparing for when you are gone."

"You are a good man, Severus," Dumbledore told him. They both knew that each was already grudgingly forgiven for their stubbornness. It was a forgiveness borne out necessity for without it neither would make it through the year alive, rather than just the one. Their friendship would weather whatever storms their respective temperaments brewed as they both coped with their future loss. "Take care of my students."

Severus waved a noncommittal hand in the air and left the office. He was tired and grateful that he would be collapsing into bed simply because he needed sleep for once and not because he needed to sleep off the aftershocks of torture or the aftershocks of massive drunkenness as occasionally happened at the rare Death Eater recruiting party. Those, thank the deities, were few and far between these days. Severus sat on the edge of his bed in nothing but his boxer shorts and mulled over bits of the conversation he'd had with the Headmaster. What was it about the Dark Lord that made him so difficult to dispose of? If Dumbledore did not want to tell him, well he was a spy and could find out for himself.

..

..

Severus was pleased to see that conditions outside were ideal for a Quidditch match. Slytherin versus Gryffindor matches were always entertaining and he was not above admitting that his feelings toward Quidditch were rather positive. In another life he could imagine himself playing on a local league and chanting in the stands drunk on sports and beer with the rest of the blokes with season tickets to see their favorite professional team. What he really hoped for was to see Gryffindor squashed by the Slytherin team again. It hadn't happened since Potter joined up as seeker, and just once before he had to leave the castle for good he wanted to see it happen again. Even Minerva, with whom he normally got on rather well, was swept up in support of her house, and their usual amity was temporarily shelved in favor of good natured rivalry.

Weasley looked purple faced with nerves and wasn't shoveling the usual pound or two of food down his gullet like he normally did. Snape could only hope those nerves would bleed into a poor performance. Potter was busy plying him drinks and Severus could tell by the Gryffindor captain's actions that he was desperate to cheer Weasley up. It was about that time that Granger entered the room and argued furiously with Ron and Harry before storming away from the both of them and sitting at the end of the Gryffindor table nearest the Head table instead. She opened a book and pretended to peer at it as she ate her cereal. However, her attention was clearly not focused and Severus felt his lips turn up at the corners at her furious scowl. Was she finally beginning to realize she needed new friends? After a moment she directed her angry gaze at him and he met her eyes with amusement. Her expression hardened some more before she looked away and Severus felt himself deflate. No doubt she was thinking about the little reminder she'd gotten the night before that he was indeed still a Death Eater. He had not even really considered what Granger thought of him before that point, but the realization that it was not positive needled.

Hermione was so angry with Ron and Harry that she hadn't even bothered to check the teacher's table to make sure Professor Snape was there. When she finally did he seemed almost downright jovial for him. Instead of scowling the corners of his mouth were slightly turned up. Any other day she would have been absolutely sure he was under the Imperius, but today she didn't care. He looked healthy and she was more relieved than she probably should have been to see it, but it did nothing to assuage her anger, and part of her directed that anger towards her clueless professor. If he had the nerve to punish Hermione for using a Confundus charm or for helping Ron with his homework when she shouldn't have, then surely Harry would really get it if he knew that there was Felix Felicis in Ron's pumpkin juice. Hermione bit back a growl at the injustice of it all because Harry never got punished for doing anything illegal. Dumbledore always made sure of that and since Hermione would never tell that he used a potion to cheat at a Quidditch match she would have to keep it to herself. It still really gutted her that she would be loyal even though she protested her and they would thank her by giving her the silent treatment.

After Gryffindor won the match, which Hermione really only watched throughout so she didn't know the details, she thought it would be best to try to make peace. Since her damnable hormones told her she still fancied Ron somewhat she figured the only way to make herself feel better would be to pretend the Felix Felicis episode never happened and congratulate him on a game well played. To her surprise and utter delight when she got to the Gryffindor changing rooms, Harry told them both that he had only pretended to put the potion in and that Ron played well all on his own. Instead of being pleased all he could do was round on Hermione and point out that she'd had a problem with Felix Felicis and thought he couldn't play without it. When Ron stormed out of the locker room stinking like sweaty leather she'd finally decided she'd had enough of him.

Hermione didn't go to the party in the Gryffindor common room right away. Instead she stalked up and down the hallways for a little while, narrowly missing a clearly disgruntled Professor Snape by ducking behind a suit of armor, and then retreating to the library. Even the sanctity of her favorite room in the castle did not bring her comfort so she decided to head back to the common room to get a butter beer if nothing else. As soon as she walked into the cacophonous common room her eyes zeroed straight in on Ron and Lavender Brown intertwined so tightly she couldn't tell where one ended and the other began. Despite herself, her eyes filled with tears and she left as quietly as she'd arrived stopping in the first empty classroom she could find.

Hermione conjured a small flock of canaries out of the tip of her wand and watched them fly around in circles above her head while she cried. Conjuring birds really is impressive magic, conjuring anything is advanced magic, but she wasn't even in the mood to celebrate her own private success. How could she have been so daft as to like Ron enough to think that he actually might like her too? They had absolutely nothing in common. Ron was repugnant and she could finally see it. Let Lavender have him, they are perfect for each other. Harry liked Ginny, not that she really fancied Harry in the first place, Cormac was vile even if he was good looking, and there was no other boy in school that made her feel anything at all.

Hermione shook her head both mentally and physically. "No! I have to keep my head together. Harry needs protecting and I have a war to fight." She stared at her birds and thought how wonderful it would be to fly away from it all like one of them.

Harry chose that moment to interrupt her followed shortly by Ron who was tugging Lavender along clearly looking for a private place. Hermione lost control of herself and after sending her lovely birds careening after Ron she tore out of the classroom fighting back sobs. She went to her room grabbed her bag and made a beeline for the library once more. She would immerse herself in research and forget about everything else for awhile. Despite being late afternoon and a Saturday there were still a few industrious students perusing the stacks in the library and hunkering over their books at the tables. Hermione found a dusty corner near the restricted section and settled down to make a list. As she wrote she swiped at furious tears and forced her mind not to wander.

In the end she had decided she needed to learn Legilimency, master Occlumency, brew an antidote to Veritaserum and Nagini's poison, start compiling a list of survival potions she would need to collect, find a way to brew Polyjuice Potion without letting any teachers know, find out how difficult it would be to create another secret tunnel between Hogwarts and Hogsmeade, and learn how to become an Animagus. Hermione sat staring at her list wondering how she was going to fit all that in with her studies. Not having any distractions from boys would make it a lot easier, even if she was having difficulties not thinking about them and the way they could smell like cedar, nutmeg, and violets. No, not boys, it was Snape who smelled like that.

"Ambitious curriculum you have set for yourself, Miss Granger."

Hermione immediately wiped her parchment blank with her wand before turning to face Professor Snape. From the vantage point of her seat he seemed taller than usual. He was stood in his usual position with shoulders scare, arms crossed, and eyes peering down over his large hooked nose as if he did not have the physical ability to tilt his head down and look properly. Hermione knew she was red and splotchy from crying and she tried not to blush even redder from embarrassment.

"I'm sorry, sir?" Playing dumb seemed the safest bet considering the tasks she was planning to embark on broke nearly every school rule and Snape did not seem like he was pleased at all.

Snape rolled his eyes. "Don't act coy with me, Granger. Clearly you need to add practice constant vigilance to your list since I was able to stand behind you long enough to read the entire thing."

Hermione could feel tears pricking at her eyes again. Now even her war efforts were about to be thwarted. Was there nothing that would go right this year?

"It's nothing, sir." Hermione folded up the blank parchment and shoved it into her bag. She stood up to leave, but he was standing so close to her chair that she actually bumped into him with it making her feel even more awkward. "Sorry."

Snape ignored Hermione and sidestepped the chair just to plant himself in front of her again. The look in his eyes was typical Snape. Dark, brooding, condescending, and a little mad. Hermione found herself staring into his eyes wondering if they had ever been filled with anything else, like laughter, calm, or lust. She blushed again and looked away.

"Why aren't you in your common room celebrating with the rest of your housemates?" He bit the last few words out through clenched teeth still stung from the loss of the game. If Gryffindor continued to play that way there would be no chance of the Quidditch cup for Slytherin again.

Hermione snorted in response and then covered her mouth immediately. The last person she wanted to be disrespectful towards was Snape.

"I think another detention is in order."

"Professor, I-," Hermione began, but stopped short when he redirected his glare on her. "Yes, sir."

"Come to my office after dinner. We will begin your detentions tonight."

"Detentions?" Hermione said a little too loudly. "But sir, you said another detention." She stressed the n on the last syllable.

He didn't say anything. He simply stared down his nose at her until she finally nodded her head and walked away. Hermione was crying again by the time she made it into her dormitory. Instead of going down to dinner Hermione waited until she after the dinner hour was over and worked her way to the dungeons. She had gone from feeling sorry for herself to quite surly over the course of the afternoon and all the girls in her dorm had left again quite quickly if they happened to venture in. Lavender never bothered to come in at all because she was no doubt too busy sucking face with Ron.

Snape was not in his office when she arrived so she leaned up against the wall to wait. While she waited she cast her own variation of the shield charm and then cancelled it over and over again so that soon she was turning it on and turning it off in rhythm with her heartbeat. She was so absorbed in what she was doing that she yelped in pain and surprise when a stinging hex slipped through while it was off and hit her on the side of the neck. She looked around wildly for her attacker and saw no one until a Disillusioned Snape revealed himself at the end of the corridor.

"Constant vigilance, Granger," he drawled as he approached her with his robes billowing out behind him. It never ceased to amaze him that even when he was advancing slowly his robes would blow out as if he came with his own personal breeze. "Surely you paid attention in Moody's class?"

Hermione got defensive and tried to not appear intimidated which was difficult to do when her eyes were leaking involuntary tears from the gigantic stinging welt on her neck. She pressed her hand tighter to her throat, but it did nothing to suppress the swelling. "It was not Moody."

Snape waved away her comment as he unwarded his office door and led her inside. He shut the door behind him and motioned for her to sit in the hard straight backed chair he had in front of his desk. "Moody still says it as we both know."

Hermione kept her mouth shut and tried not to look as angry as she felt.

"Your shield is impressive, and will be more so when you learn more control. I notice that it protects you from behind as well." Snape sat down in his more comfortable looking desk chair leaned back and crossed his legs. He laced his fingers over his stomach and managed to peer down his nose at her even from that position. Hermione could not help the little thrill she felt course through her body at seeing him in such a casual arrangement. What in the bloody hell was that? Snape? Ugh.

"Yes, sir, but as you said I do need to learn more control," she admitted trying to keep her voice steady. Thankfully her face was already red from suppressing the pain of the stinging hex so he did not see her blush. She gestured to the welt on her throat. "And I need to practice constant vigilance."

Professor Snape stood up and disappeared out of the office and returned in a moment with some balm for her throat. Hermione took it gratefully and sighed as the stinging immediately went away.

Once Hermione appeared comfortable again, Professor Snape gazed at her with an intense stare. He was one of the few who truly understood the girl's potential, and he understood why Voldemort would be attracted to someone like her. He even understood why Potter and Weasley wanted her around even if they did not truly understand or always appreciate her. What he did not understand was why she latched herself onto them. She did not appear to be vainglorious even if this war was as much hers to fight as it was the Potter's, so her reasoning for needing their friendships above all others mystified him. Still, it was that friendship he needed to exploit if he was going to solve any of the other mysteries he needed to solve in any sort of timely manner.

Hermione was tempted to quail under his gaze, but she held firm and placed her mental shields up as stably as she could. She did not feel any pressure from her professor though.

"Tell me, Granger," Snape drawled and Hermione found she was pleased that he had dropped her honorific. "What are you and your friends up to these days?"

It took a moment for Hermione to get past Snape's honeyed tones and focus on the words he had said. "Sir?"

Snape fought the urge to pinch off the headache growing at the bridge of his nose and to skip the little chat and simply invade her mind. "I imagine you are all plotting some sort illegal activities to carry out before the end of the year. After all, it would hardly be Hogwarts for you three if you did not include something incredibly dangerous and stupid to do right around exam time."

Hermione stiffened her shoulders and her mental shields. "What activities we may have been involved in were certainly not ones we would share with the faculty and I hardly see why we should start now. Sir."

Snape ignored the slightly insolent tone. "Don't you think, Granger, that if any of you had consulted a teacher or the Headmaster in the past when trouble arose that you may have avoided a lot of the situations you found yourselves in?"

Hermione was confused. It was clear he wanted to know if they were planning anything that could get them in trouble like the previous year when they were in the Department of Mysteries, but he was being incredibly vague. Why he was fishing and not outright asking was beyond her, but she would play along.

"I tell Harry all the time to get advice from a more qualified adult, but in his defense the one time we did, no one believed us anyway. Actually that's happened twice now."

"When exactly has this happened?" Snape asked leaning forward slightly. He could not remember any moment in the past when a member of the Gryffindor trio had actually humbled themselves enough to seek assistance.

"First year we went to Professor McGonagall and told her that someone was trying to steal the Philosopher's Stone and she told us to go away." Hermione already knew that Professor McGonagall had relayed the message to Dumbledore when he had returned to the castle that night, but it was not until then that she even thought it important enough.

Professor Snape grunted. "Fine, but when else?"

"Several weeks ago Harry mentioned that he believed Malfoy put Katie Bell under the Imperius Curse and gave her the necklace. As far as we know, no one has taken that complaint seriously," Hermione said.

"Do you take it seriously?" Snape inquired, truly curious.

Hermione stared at the wall pensively for a moment before looking back at Snape. His gaze had remained level on hers. She was beginning to feel slight nudges on the edge of her mind and forced her shields to stay strong while she talked. "At first I thought he was barking mad because I figured there was no way Voldemort would let Draco be a Death Eater, but we already had that conversation. Now, I know that whether I agree with Harry or not it is best to act as if I do because assuming Malfoy is not dangerous would be dangerous. Besides, as I told you before, I saw Malfoy that day. If he was here doing detention with McGonagall then somebody was using Polyjuice or extremely confounded."

"I see," he replied dismissing her words and Hermione felt the mental pressure ease up. "Does Potter share with you what he learns in his private lessons with Professor Dumbledore?"

Hermione sat up straighter to the abrupt change of subject. "Who are you asking for? Yourself, or Voldemort?"

"The name, Miss Granger, careful with the name," Snape hissed and she felt his pressure strengthen against her mind once again, but she was weakening and soon he would learn something she probably did not want him to know. She wanted to trust him, but he was a Death Eater and a spy, and no matter how good he smelled or how silky she thought his voice was that was a recipe for disaster.

Snape gave in to his headache and pinched the bridge of his nose. He summoned a headache potion and downed it before answering her.

"Incidentally, this is information I would like to know for myself. I have my reasons."

Hermione decided she could admit that he did share the information, but that was as far as she would go. "Of course he tells me."

"Did Dumbledore forbid you from discussing it with anyone else?" Snape pushed a little harder in her mind and the shield slipped just enough to give him his answer. Hermione's temples were beginning to throb and she was sorely tempted to reach out for the remainder of his headache potion.

Snape flopped back into his chair sneering. Clearly there was something making him angry beyond the fact that Dumbledore forbade her and her friends from discussing Harry's lessons outside their little group. He seemed to forget she was there as he sat there brooding and she felt immense relief as he disengaged from her mind fully even though he had never fully penetrated it in the first place. Occlumency was exhausting, but when she was finally able to think clearly again something clicked.

"Dumbledore won't even tell you what he is doing with Harry." It was a statement not a question and Hermione fought to keep from clapping a hand over her mouth for having the audacity to speak out loud.

Snape's eyes snapped on her. He was clearly on the brink of rage. He said nothing, but he did not dismiss her so Hermione decided to push her luck a little further.

"Sir, what does this have to do with Malfoy?"

"What?" he snapped.

Hermione fidgeted and struggled to pull her shields up once more as she felt his presence near her mind once again. "You asked how I felt about Malfoy, and then about Harry."

"So you are admitting that Potter's visits with Dumbledore have nothing to do with Malfoy?" he asked.

"I think you already know the answer to that." Hermione was sure that had to be true. There was something in Professor Snape's face that made Hermione feel badly for him. He was clearly enraged that Dumbledore was withholding information, but there was something else too. Something more like regret mingled with sorrow, tossed together with fear. Still she would not trust him. Not yet.

"You are correct. I do know that one has nothing to do with the other." Snape rearranged his face into a blank mask once he realized how intently Hermione was regarding his expression.

"What happened to Dumbledore's arm?" Hermione asked suddenly.

"It was cursed." Snape's blunt reply was dripping with sarcasm, and that was a language she knew well.

"You don't say?" Hermione drawled in return and rolled her eyes.

Snape's black eyes flashed again. "Five points from Gryffindor for your cheek, Miss Granger."

Hermione looked properly chastised. It should have been clear to Snape that she was not going to volunteer any information to him unless he pried it out of her mind and she was tempted to tell he to get on with it because she'd had a long day and wanted to go to sleep. Clearly he had to know that Dumbledore never told Harry what the curse was doing or she would never have asked.

"Dumbledore's dying isn't he?" she asked.

Snape stood up. "This detention is over. I will notify you of the next one."

Hermione stood awkwardly, but gratefully, and left. Snape's reaction to her last question could only mean one thing. Dumbledore was dying, but the question was how much time was left? And would Harry learn all he needed to know before the end?

As soon as Granger was gone, Snape rested his head on his arms. She had kept her shields up incredibly well only letting them slip once. She was a fast learner. The only problem was he was not sure how he was going to gain her trust so that he could get the information he needed. He supposed the best way to do it would be to mentor her in some capacity, or give her answers to the questions she asked. Tit for tat and all that, but that could be dangerous. Would he risk sacrificing Granger to help end the war? The immediate answer that popped into his mind sickened him.