Warnings: yaoi, extreme silliness, possible ooc, post-war
Disclaimer: As much as I may wish that I had some claim on Gundam Wing and Monty Python I must say that the only thing I own is the story itself.
It was a rainy summer day and five ex-gundam pilots were stuck indoors. Heero had aimed unerringly for the dubious sanctuary of his laptop while Trowa and Quatre barricaded themselves in the music room and Wufei ran for the library. Duo sat staring out the window alone. The minutes ticked by as they waited, waited for the phrase that had spelled the doom of many an unsuspecting Oz soldier in the past. Then they came, the seemingly innocent words of a nineteen year old:
"Guys, I'm Bored!"
They cringed. Somehow the braided wonder had managed to make himself heard all over the house, no one was safe. In the library Chang Wufei sighed and put away his book, across the hall the lovebirds put away their instruments and three doors down the Perfect Soldier shutdown his laptop and went to join the others. They all knew better than to try and ignore their energetic friend. That would only result in the widespread destruction of property and their involvement in the cleanup process. They reached the living room and found the hyper young man waiting expectantly, his violet eyes practically glowing with mischief. All of their minds worked frantically, how to keep him busy!? Quatre walked over to a closet and pulled out a small stack of games: Risk, Monopoly, Scrabble, Taboo, and Twister formed a neat pile on the floor. Trowa located a few C.D.'s and slipped them in, determined to prevent Duo from gaining control of the radio. Wufei and Heero disappeared into the kitchen for a few moments, re- emerging bearing trays laden with snacks and drinks. Desperately hoping that the rain stopped soon they got started.
Risk was first, Duo got himself rooted into a number of small islands and stubbornly refused to be moved. From his momentarily secure position he taunted the other pilots:
"Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries, I fart in your general direction!" He then put his thumbs in his ears and wiggled his fingers while blowing them an enthusiastic raspberry. "Come back so that I may taunt you a second time."
In response Heero twitched all but imperceptibly, Quatre announced that he was going to dispose of that video, and Trowa pushed Duo out of the game. The defeated one grinned cheerfully and teamed up with his lover. Eventually Quatre was crowned King of the World and granted the position of spinner in a game of twister. Wufei wrapped a possessive arm about Duo's waist and silently promised a slow and painful death to anyone who dared touch him unnecessarily. With that the game went underway.
"Left foot red"
"Fei move your hip"
"Heero quit glaring at me I can't help it"
"Damnit Chang, you knee is in the way"
"Right hand blue"
"Somebody just stepped on my braid"
"Yeah well somebody just elbowed me in the back"
"Sorry 'bout that"
"Did anybody hear what the last color was?"
"Left hand Yellow"
"How do you two do that?!"
"Now I see why you tolerate his chatter"
"Good point Trowa, how did we miss that?"
"Fei-love, are you growling?"
1 Round Two
"Left hand Green"
* THUD *
"Wu-chan, you all right?"
"Fine" Wufei picked himself up and joined Heero and Quatre on the side
"Left foot red"
"Hey! I wanted that one!"
"Fine, no need to be rude about it"
"Eh?" The boy in question craned his neck around, "Oh, hey Zechs. Um, can't talk now, this isn't as easy as it looks."
"It doesn't look easy at all. Trowa I expected to be flexible but you Duo….Heero why didn't you ever tell me about this."
"I didn't know, none of us did. Chang has been keeping secrets."
"Right hand yellow"
"You have got to be kidding"
"You first Tro-man"
"Where did we get this mat anyway, It seems to be much larger than normal."
"It came with the house"
"Oh!" They watched in suspenseful silence as the pair arched their backs and twisted slightly to get to the unoccupied dots.
"Left foot green"
"There is no way"
"…. … ….!"
* THUD *
"Ack! Trowa you did that on purpose."
As Trowa stood up and helped Duo to his feet Wufei started putting away the game quietly ranting about the injustice of having his koi ogled. Wasn't bad enough they ignored him all the time. Now they wanted to know how he managed to twist his legs like that. Resisting the urge to grab him by the braid and haul him out of there, he thought back. The others had been genuinely shocked when he and Duo had paired up. They didn't know that the boisterous American could be serious. Or that despite his tendency to play the fool he was really remarkably intelligent. They'd had so many wonderful conversations when the others weren't around. Duo could quote Shakespeare as freely as he did Monty Python and discussed ancient architecture and Quantum Physics with equal fervor and detail. All that and they were getting worked up over a backbend?
"Sorry guys, but I don't think Fei would appreciate it if I did any more tricks tonight."
He smiled, no need to worry about Duo, his angel was ever attentive.
As though to prove the point Duo walked over and took the game from him, putting it away with the others. Then he took an arm and gave a gentle tug.
"Goodnight guys, thanks for the games."
Wufei grinned wickedly, said goodnight, and followed his beloved to bed.
The rest of the small group sat for a moment, vaguely dumbfounded. It was Quatre who broke the silence.
"They had a good idea. Goodnight everybody."
And so it was that the one time Gundam Pilots, previously the most feared terrorists on Earth and Space, survived the hurricane that is Duo Maxwell yet again.
Well that's it. Opinions? Suggestions? Care to ask me what I'm on?